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Have you thought about a .22 or a .22mag for your mom? You mentioned small hands and a hard time with the slide on a semi-auto. Not near as noisy and minimal recoil. A well placed 22 round is just as lethal as a poorly placed .38 and she'll be able to get a follow-up shot easier/faster and more accurately if needed. Not as glamorous but might be a better fit for the situation.
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An armed member of society is a citizen, an unarmed member is a subject.
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