Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ's left nut
I'll say this, and it's advice I'll at least give to my son and probably my daughters as well.
If something is important, act like it.
I've only known a few people who have gotten divorced in my circle of friends/family (I mean, excluding my parents and then my dad again), but to a person they did some chintzy wedding or got married at the courthouse.
If your marriage is disposable, sure - treat the wedding like it is. But if it's serious, treat it like it's serious. This goes for any event. I won't go to church without at least a jacket and damn sure won't do weddings or funerals without a suit, even if I'm not in them.
Now I do agree that things have gotten excessive in a lot of ways. But it was important to me that I make a sacrifice to get that ring. I ended up having to wait another 6-7 years to get a motorcycle because the money I'd have spent on it, I spent on her ring instead. I could've spent a couple hundred bucks and still been married, but again - if it's important, act like it.
I also understand people that think that's a load of shit. But I'm betting more of them end up divorced than people that look at it like I do. Put some skin in the game or how serious about this are you, really? And if you're not serious enough to make a sacrifice, you probably shouldn't be getting married.
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I hold the same position. The way I phrase it is "pay it the respect it deserves."
The logical side of me says it doesn't ****ing matter. But the practical side of my life pretty much exclusively shows that if you do little shit (like dressing up for important shit) it does something to the psychology of yourself.
That being said, there is nuance and exceptions. Some people it doesn't change things psychology. RE: Divorce, some people can take it seriously and shit goes off the rails. People change, people weren't grown up enough to understand real life, shit happens. But I'd agree. Taking it seriously and doing "right" improves the probability of success.