Out on stage comes New York resident and the former host of The Late Show, David Letterman!
(Letterman walks out as Paul Shaffer plays a jaunty tune. Letterman peeks at a large written card.)
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm delighted to present to you the Top Ten reasons why we are drafting this particular fellow.
10. We enjoy watching him hit people.
9. He's not afraid to walk through the city at night.
8. His fashion color wheel says that Giants Blue will be dreamy on him.
7. He is willing to fight Lawrence Taylor to wear the number 56.
6. He can look at a group photo of all 32 NFL head coaches and identify Brian Daboll.
5. He agreed to take the locker on the end of the row where you constantly get bumped by people opening the door.
4. He is using Lamar Jackson's agent.
3. He misunderstood what his pro day was, and bought prostitutes for the Giants' coaching staff.
2. He begged us to not let him get drafted by the broncos.
And the number 1 reason to draft this guy is ...
1. Mahomes isn't available.
The New York Giants select Brandon Joseph, S, Notre Dame."
