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Have you seen any of the shorts about when a man says "I'm fine"?
I recently had a milestone birthday and have done a lot of self-reflection on these items, and I've come up with a few things that I'm changing and a few things I'm not happy with even though I have a ton of reasons to feel good about where I am now vs where I started.
Part of being an achiever with goals is to be self-critical. The same things that make you successful are also going to chew on you at night. No one will ever be harder on me, than I am. I'll never not question myself in some ways for my career and if I should make a change for my personal happiness, or if I'm the best husband I can be, or if I'm doing enough for my kids.
What I did decide during this past birthday is that my years are growing shorter to do something, and I'm going to put more focus on people and things that are important to me and spend a lot less on things that just cause me grief.
My dreams tell me a lot about how things are going. This week I'm dreaming I'm in a dark, damp basement, down in a cistern made of stones. I'm digging hand holes to climb out, and there is little crab-monster thing the size of a ping pong ball trying to jump on me. Every time I smash it, it cracks open the shell and grows larger. I have no idea what this is telling me about what's going on, but at least I'm not wading through the large fountain pool of dark water full of crocodiles, using a broken broom handle to fight my way to get to this little kid they're trying to eat.
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