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I find my first class seat,
Aboard the American Standard Throne.
I Open up this months' Field and Stream
to Enjoy 5 minutes time alone.
I hear the scratching at the door,
I see the handle turn.
This is one of those moments
From which my child should not learn.
"no no!" doesn't do the trick,
and before me she now stands
"Daddy, daddy Whachu Doin?"
this 1 year old Demands.
"Woman get her out of here!"
the Alpha Male now Shouts.
What a lovely family gathering,
Now all of you get out.
In shock and some embarrassment,
Forced to pinch off the angry beast.
What does a man have to do at home,
for time to deficate in peace?
I hear the wife a laughing,
And what else could she do?
The child shouts outside the door,
Daddy! Daddy poopy! peee yeeeeeeeeeew.
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