[JohnnyV13]

In the Beginning, there was Adam, the first quarterback. Adam cavorted on the green field alone, running and cutting and throwing and God saw that it was good. But God knew that Adam was lonely and needed a companion. Thus, God caused Adam to slam his head into the field and rendered him unconscious. While he was knocked out, God took from Adam all his common sense, and shaped it into a new form. This new creature God named "head cheerleader". Eve danced and pranced on the field, admiring all of Adam's exploits while waving her pom-poms. Adam was no longer lonely, and now ran up and down the Field with abaondon. God saw all that he had made and saw that it was Good.

God was not yet finished. To give Adam's running and jumping direction and purpose, he created "Touchdown" and "Field Goal". In the days of their innocence, Adam and his friends ran and played on the field, Eve and her friends cheered, while the stands filled with Students who then became known as Fans. Shouts of joy filled the air and God knew that what he had created was Good.

One dark night after a Game, Eve wandered across the Field and Lo! a serpent spoke to her from the grass. "Why is it that you play the great game of football and only God above can witness your feats? Would it not be better to share the spectacle with the rest of the world through the medium of Television?" The serpent then presented a contract to Eve and said unto her, "Have the quarterback Adam sign this document, and the masses shall worship you on Sundays."