Intelligent conversations are not allowed? You mean I can't post the standard "old timer" intelligent responses that literally fill this forum by the thousands like:
"This."
or
or
"n00B"
(And really, what kind of nub spells noob like they are really trying to be l33t?)
or
Geez, I don't know what I'm going to do in such a situation. I am befuddled.