Well, certainly some wisdom in this thread already. El Borracho's point is certainly true. Noswad's system works if it works for you, though it's not one I'd recommend.
Here's the thing, in my opinion -- poll after poll shows that married couples fight as much or more about money than anything else in their relationship. Fights over money cause tremendous stress on a marriage, and can be one way the two partners are engaging in what is fundamentally a power struggle. It can also reflect a mentality of having one foot out the door which I think is very counterproductive to a successful marriage.
The first thing that needs to happen is full faith and trust in each other. Lay it all out there. You're married now, so if it's going to work, you need to have full disclosure on both sides. Here's what I make, here's what you make. Here are my deductions and here's my take home.
Then run through the debt. This is what I owe to whom.
Then run through the unavoidable monthly expenses. Figure out what are common to both of you (rent/mortgage, electrical, gas/heat, etc.).
I would recommend a common plan to pool the funds, and attack the debt as fast as possible, especially the CC debt which is a complete killer with the 18% interest or whatever. If you are paying interest, then use CC games to transfer balances if you're confident you can pay attention to the details and not get murdered.
Oh, and make a pact -- until all the CCs of both parties are paid, you cut up your cards. Can't use them. Cash only.
Once you are BOTH out of hock, you'll both be relieved of alot of stress.
At a more 30,000 foot level, I'd suggest adopting Ugly Duck's plan.
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Originally Posted by Ugly Duck
Or... Pool the income, pay the bills, put some away & then figure out a reasonable amount of "disposable" dough. Split the "disposable" in half & dole it out in cash... no more credit cards. Can't get in trouble that way & there'll be nothing to argue about. Well... at least no more arguing about money...
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Your current system to me is one I would call "recipe for divorce."