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Out drinking one night got a booty call from an old “friend”. Having nothing better to do, and face time with a movie sounds good, I head over to his house.
We chill on the couch, drink a few beers, and watch a bit of whatever movie was playin. Movie was boring so we head back to his room. It’s dark; we get naked and start playing around. Next thing I know he’s all gruntin and huffin and puffin. I’m thinking WTF? And then I realize “holy shit! I think, HE thinks, he’s ****ing the hell outta me!!” so as I lay there, his sweat dripping off his face and onto my chest, my inner voice says, “damn! Now I remember why I quit ****ing him years ago! He has the smallest dick ever seen!” So with that I ramp up ol’ Meg Ryan and he gets off. well I get up, throw on my clothes, tell him thanks for the romp but I have to get home. You know, early workday and all.
The bad thing about all of this is, as I was telling this story to a friend a few years back. The look of utter shock and fear crossed her face, and it confused me. I told her it was no biggy since he had moved off and we hadn’t fooled around since then. And as she stared into my eyes and shook her head “no” she said Kindra, you do not have an inner voice, not even sober. There is no way in hell you all of a sudden got an “inner voice” when you were drunk.
And you know I thought about it and thought about it. I can be a cold hearted bitch when needed, but there’s no way, even after a few beers, that I told him he had a small dick.
And I know there was no whiskey involved that night.
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