[suzzer99]

One thing that helped me was reading that teenagers brains aren't wired correctly yet. I forget all the details, but basically they're predisposed to all kinds of mood swings, impulsive behavior, judgement errors, bad ethical decisions, faulty reasoning, etc. For me anyway, putting it in that light helped me not take any of that stuff personally, or fear my kid was going to turn out that way.

Instead I looked at it more as a problem of how to get through to her w/o pushing her away or laying it on too thick. For example, one of my favorite moves is to tell some story about how stupid I was in HS on some point I want to get across to her. That way instead of a confrontational lecture, I get the same point across with an entertaining story. Luckily I ****ed up about every way imaginable in HS, and so have an endless repertoire of stories in this area.

To be sure, getting through to a teen is a very tricky problem, and a constantly moving target. But if you can eliminate the personal aspect, it becomes a little more manageable imo. Good luck!