Quote:
Originally Posted by memyselfI
I have no way supported his actions. I'm trying to understand them. I'm also trying to make the distinction between his actions and what his teammates feel. There is a very real distinction whether you choose to see it or not.
If this happened in an office we wouldn't be privy to how people mourned their friend. Likewise, the attachment an office worker feels to a coworker is nothing compared to what teammates feel for each other. These men are mourning in a fishbowl and subjected to standards and conditions they are apparently supposed to behave by to be considered mourning, grieving, dealing and coping 'appropriately.'
I'm simply saying there is no such thing.
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What you were saying was that it was appropriate for the team to "honor their fallen teammate" and that they should treat his "loss" as "significant". Those are terms you use with showing respect for the deceased. That's not appropriate in these circumstances.
I understand that the situation is psychologically complicated and that they will, indeed, have to grieve in their own way, but it's not ever going to be appropriate for them to do ANYTHING either officially, or unofficially,
as a team to "honor" him as a teammate. You can go to the funeral and grieve, and try to console his family, but the rest doesn't belong here. Those are the comments that you originally made that I was talking about.
We had a police officer in Dodge that murdered his girlfriend. Did the other officers all know him and feel terrible? Yes. But if they had done anything of the type that you are describing, then they would've been pilloried, and rightfully so.
Should the Carolina Panthers have held a commemorative banquet "going away" party for Rae Carruth?