[-King-]

Originally Posted by Saul Good

#85 BigRedChief

BigRedChief is the single most self-indulgent poster on this board. He tries to come across as everyone's buddy, but every thread he starts is nothing more than a vehicle for humble-bragging. We get it, BRC...you make a bunch of money, but you could make a lot more if you weren't so dedicated to serving others...what a great guy you are. Basically, he's the upper-middle class version of Dane. I'd say he's like Dane minus the part about treating twelve year old's sphinctors as pinky rings, but I've seen pictures of him, and if he doesn't have to turn off his lights and close his curtains on Halloween, he should. Also, he's the kind of guy who calls his
curtains "drapes".

He decorates his house in 1980s artwork that focuses on nearly nude drawings of women with butch haircuts. They remind him of his younger days when he was a keytar player in a Styx cover band. He claims that he is some black belt in karate, but the closest he comes to working out is when he invites frazod over to jack off to Jane Fonda movies on VHS.

Pros: Once got away with ripping off Columbia House by purchasing 8 tapes for a penny and then claiming to move out of the country to avoid having to buy the rest. Can wear Zubaz pants, and it actually works for him.

Cons: Calls black people "coloreds". Chews nicotine gum while smoking. Cleans his ears with safety pins.

Outlook for 2014: Exactly the same as this year. Nothing about him has changed since 1982. Why should next year be any different?

On par or maybe even better than Hooties roast.