Quote:
Originally Posted by MTG#10
I dont know why Im posting this thread, just need to vent. I know I shouldnt be feeling this way, its been almost a year since my wife left but I feel like I just missed the birth of my own child. I knew it was going to happen soon and I thought I was mentally prepared but when her dad called me and told me this morning I quickly realized I wasn't. I cant believe I still love her after everything she's done to me and put me through both emotionally and financially. I would take her back and help her raise her baby in a heartbeat. Thats how much I love her. ****ing pathetic I know. When's this shit going to end? Its been 10 months and it still hurts just as much as the day I found out. Its so hard to keep face in front of my kids, they are so excited to have a new baby sister and I have to pretend Im happy and excited for them but its killing me. I know I have to be strong for my kids and I will but when they are gone I dont know what to do.
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Anytime someone has a baby we feel a little joy, that's what new life does. Your children are excited to be a part of something that is one of the greatest miracles of living. And your envy of that is completely normal. It's ok that you feel hurt and some love towards your ex in this new life. It's normal you want to be a part of it. And it sucks. There's no great way to get through this, except that the same thing that pulls you out of bed in the morning and gets you through the day, will be the same thing that gets you through this. Rejoice in your children's joy, help them to be good siblings and teach them loving ways, just to take the focus off you ex, put your focus on them. And when they leave, cry, throw things, do what you need to do to get your feelings out, and one day there will come a time when things seem normal and you'll have moved on and feel better for it. Right now you just have to live in hope and never let it die.