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Old 03-25-2020, 09:21 AM  
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Missouri Wal Mart Deodorant Licker Apprehended!

https://www.aol.com/article/news/202...ifFLIGW6N0Z29w

A man who police accused of licking items in a Missouri Walmart has been charged with making a terrorist threat.

Cody Lee Pfister, 26, was charged by the Warren County Prosecuting Attorney's Office with making the threat after police said he made a video of himself licking items in a Walmart store.

A video posted to social media shows a man saying to the camera: "Who's scared of the coronavirus? Don't touch your mouth" before licking a row of items on the store shelf.

A statement from the City of Warrenton Police Department on Monday said that "a local resident who took a video of themselves licking the merchandise after making a 'Corona Virus' statement at Walmart and posting it to social media has been taken into custody."

Pfister was then charged by the Warren County Prosecuting Attorney's Office with a terrorist threat in the second degree, The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported.

In Missouri, making a terrorist threat in the second degree means ignoring the risk of "causing the evacuation, quarantine or closure of any portion of a building" and is a class E felony, which means it can be met with a prison sentence of up to four years and a fine.

A hearing is scheduled for Wednesday, according to the Post-Dispatch.

The Warrenton Police Department said on Facebook that people around the world had been in touch to complain about the video. The department said it "received numerous reports about the video from locals, nearby residents, as well as people from the Netherlands, Ireland, and the United Kingdom."

"We take these complaints very seriously and would like to thank all of those who reported the video so the issue could be addressed."

Pfister's attorney did not respond to a message from the Post-Dispatch as of Tuesday. According to the Post-Dispatch, he has previously pleaded guilty to charges including burglary and stealing a firearm.

The US Centers for Disease Control has warned that the coronavirus could stay on various surfaces for hours or days, meaning that people could become infected from touching an item that someone infected has touched.

The CDC says that "a person can get COVID-19 by touching a surface or object that has the virus on it and then touching their own mouth."
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Old 03-25-2020, 09:33 AM   #2
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As if we needed more reasons to never shop at Walmart.
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Old 03-25-2020, 09:39 AM   #3
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You could argue that anyone entertained by said video is a bigger dumb ass than the perp, who is a plenty big dumb ass.
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Old 03-25-2020, 09:43 AM   #4
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just duct tape a go pro to his forehead, and thwo him out of an aiirplane at 10k feet w/out a parachute; then upload to youtube.
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Old 03-25-2020, 09:44 AM   #5
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Old 03-25-2020, 09:46 AM   #6
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:06 AM   #7
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Cody Lee Pfister of Warrenton is being outsmarted by a virus.
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:07 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dayze View Post
just duct tape a go pro to his forehead, and thwo him out of an aiirplane at 10k feet w/out a parachute; then upload to youtube.
Now that’s entertainment!
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:13 AM   #9
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He probably thinks he's smarter than 50% of the population too.
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:14 AM   #10
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:19 AM   #11
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I see the previous arrests of Cody Lee Pfister for burgarly and stealing a firearm, and I suddenly had an epiphany.

We should make the death penalty cumulative. Even if you don't murder a bunch of people, you can still be put to death if you lead a life of constantly being problematic to society.

Maybe something like this.

1. 1,000 lifetime penalty points gets you the death penalty.
2. We have a table of penalty points that is public. Something like this.

1,000 points - 1st degree murder
500 points - Burglary
500 points - Armed robbery
250 points - Licking stuff in Wal Mart during a pandemic
200 points - DUI
100 points - Assault
50 points - Hit and Run
25 points - Shoplifting
10 points - Throwing stuff onto the field at a football game
5 points - More than 15 items in an express lane
1 point - Squeezing the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.

3. You hit 1,000, you get taken out back and shot.

It's a good system because we all know that there are petty criminals out there who do no good to society, but they also don't do the really bad stuff to get themselves offed. This will force them to straighten up and fly right at some point, or they're going to get executed for stealing a Snickers Bar.
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:23 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post
I see the previous arrests of Cody Lee Pfister for burgarly and stealing a firearm, and I suddenly had an epiphany.

We should make the death penalty cumulative. Even if you don't murder a bunch of people, you can still be put to death if you lead a life of constantly being problematic to society.

Maybe something like this.

1. 1,000 lifetime penalty points gets you the death penalty.
2. We have a table of penalty points that is public. Something like this.

1,000 points - 1st degree murder
500 points - Burglary
500 points - Armed robbery
250 points - Licking stuff in Wal Mart during a pandemic
200 points - DUI
100 points - Assault
50 points - Hit and Run
25 points - Shoplifting
10 points - Throwing stuff onto the field at a football game
5 points - More than 15 items in an express lane
1 point - Squeezing the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.

3. You hit 1,000, you get taken out back and shot.

It's a good system because we all know that there are petty criminals out there who do no good to society, but they also don't do the really bad stuff to get themselves offed. This will force them to straighten up and fly right at some point, or they're going to get executed for stealing a Snickers Bar.
How many points for GMs who passed on Patrick Mahomes?
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:30 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smithandrew051 View Post
How many points for GMs who passed on Patrick Mahomes?
250 if you didn't trade up within the top 10, 950 if you did.
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:38 AM   #14
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Old 03-25-2020, 10:40 AM   #15
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