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Old 10-30-2018, 03:56 PM  
rabblerouser rabblerouser is offline
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I'm depressed
So, I'm not really happy...on the surface things seem great, I have a decent job, Chiefs are kicking ass, I have a nice crib in the country, a couple cars, play some music on the weekends...

But I'm absolutely depressed. I miss my daughter, I miss my ex-girlfriend, Brittney...

I want to move to NY, but I have to wait for my job.

So, it seems like I'm stuck here, at least for a bit...

Not much is bringing me pleasure, I was so depressed today at work...I get weird thoughts, not like I want to hurt myself, but just...musings on the pointlessness of going to work every single day, just to pay to exist, just to really pay for the kid that I never see...

I'm actually pretty damn lonely, even in a roomful of people.

It sucks.
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Old 10-31-2018, 11:10 PM   #121
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Holy shit, it's time to end the Billays mom joke. I feel awful now about that. Jesus.
Dont feel bad at all. My moms sense of humor was just as sick as all of you mother****ers. I'm the same way. That's how I know her energy never left. Lifes too short not for laughs keep on keeping on. I laugh at most of your jokes
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Old 10-31-2018, 11:54 PM   #122
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You may not miss those things at all. You may have depression and because you feel that way you blame it on outside shit. I have horrible depression. Just getting through the day is terrible and when I asked for help it led me to spend thousands of dollars with doctors and hospital that got me no where other than the fact that I just got to go one day at a time.
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Old 11-01-2018, 02:07 AM   #123
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Seek professional help. Modern medicine has been successful treating depression. There is no shame in getting professional help. Remember to be thankful and grateful for all that you do have. This is especially true if your physical health is good. Help those that are less fortunate than you. There is great solace in helping others.
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Old 11-01-2018, 05:38 AM   #124
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Some people legitimately have imbalances of chemicals in their brain. It doesn't make you less of a man to take something to help. I don't know if you exercise or not but that helps tremendously with mood and the way you feel.
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Old 11-01-2018, 05:51 AM   #125
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Hey Rabble,

I'll open up a bit. This time of the year is tough on my depression. Seems like it's always ****ing dark.

Today was the last day this shitty diner was open. It used to be good. Anyway when I first discovered it was really ****ing good. It was when my mom was dying of cancer. Literally going there alone was my "safe space" for those few hours all the stress and sadness of seeing her dying was my getaway to some good food with interesting people watching and good oldies music being played. I didnt smoke or drink back then going there was literally my get away how stupid is that? I was the first customer in line today. The meal ****ing sucked I didnt even finish it which probably added to my depression but it also brought back all those memories of the shit I went through with my mom and even the good times. Sorry this post is emo. Just know theres people struggling with ya and I'm always here to talk. Things will get better brother.
People watching the clientele at Chubby's is a great way to feel better about yourself. Similar to watching WWII and Vietnam docs.
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Old 11-01-2018, 07:34 AM   #126
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People watching the clientele at Chubby's is a great way to feel better about yourself. Similar to watching WWII and Vietnam docs.
yes! The shit I've seen there I could write a book on.
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Old 11-01-2018, 07:51 AM   #127
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Everyones going to have an opinion on this and I'm not sure if everyone is right or wrong but here is my two cents.

I used to be a drug rep for several years and depression was my specialty. If you ever decide to go that route ( and it can work) its hard to know which one works best. I hate to say it but drug reps play a big role in what doctors RX, you would like to think its what they think is best for you but most of the time its whichever rep calls on them the most or who they like the best. If you ever want any info let me know but again just my two cents.

On the side I coach crossfit, doesn't really matter what kind of trainer but I do know from working with hundreds of people that those who workout with other people ( in a class format) not only look better but feel much better. We have a could of people that were in the military who have PTSD who have said that exercising with other people, nice loud music, get your aggressions out, have not only changed their life but saved their life.

Your diet can play a big role as well but I won't preach that to you.

Reach out to family or friends but those are my tips.
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Old 11-01-2018, 09:24 AM   #128
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Start working out, listen to music, drink plenty of water, eat healthy and don't watch the news.
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Old 11-01-2018, 10:06 AM   #129
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Thank you all...this thread is helping.
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Old 11-01-2018, 10:15 AM   #130
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Well, I don't have any great words of advice. I do have some anectodal musings though.

I'm a kid of divorced parents. Only, my mom married 4 times and divorced. We moved alot. Mostly around KC and the midwest. I have some experience with what I'd call a feeling of being lost, directionless, and uncertain about past, present, and future choices.

I don't know that what I felt for several years would be considered clinical depression or just a bunch of aftermath from a pretty ****ed up childhood. What has done the trick for me is surrounding myself with successfull, funny, fun loving, adventurous, and most importantly, unconditionally loving friends and now my family. That changes everything. Go to the people that you know care about you. Hang out. Go do things you like to do with them. You will feel better as you realize that people care about you.

Hope you get to feeling better
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Old 11-01-2018, 10:42 AM   #131
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Start working out, listen to music, drink plenty of water, eat healthy and don't watch the news.
There is actually a lot to this that is right on the money. 30 minute workouts daily are fine. Cut out grains and processed food and eat as healthy as possible. The one thing I would add is get enough sleep. Don't watch TV or do anything stressful before sleep and you will get higher quality sleep.
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Old 11-01-2018, 01:15 PM   #132
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Hey Rabble,

I'll open up a bit. This time of the year is tough on my depression. Seems like it's always ****ing dark.

Today was the last day this shitty diner was open. It used to be good. Anyway when I first discovered it was really ****ing good. It was when my mom was dying of cancer. Literally going there alone was my "safe space" for those few hours all the stress and sadness of seeing her dying was my getaway to some good food with interesting people watching and good oldies music being played. I didnt smoke or drink back then going there was literally my get away how stupid is that? I was the first customer in line today. The meal ****ing sucked I didnt even finish it which probably added to my depression but it also brought back all those memories of the shit I went through with my mom and even the good times. Sorry this post is emo. Just know theres people struggling with ya and I'm always here to talk. Things will get better brother.
i used to love chubby's too
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Old 11-01-2018, 02:12 PM   #133
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Some people legitimately have imbalances of chemicals in their brain. It doesn't make you less of a man to take something to help. I don't know if you exercise or not but that helps tremendously with mood and the way you feel.
This cannot be emphasized enough.
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Old 11-02-2018, 05:17 PM   #134
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So...does anyone have any info, or does anyone know if someone on CP is a NY family law attorney?

Not asking for a friend.
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Old 11-02-2018, 05:19 PM   #135
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Damn, Chubby's closed?

Used to go there for after gig meals back when I was jamming at Blayneys and GE...

Time waits for no one. Not even Chubbys diner.
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