Misc What do I do? - Page 4

Titty Meat · 08-03-2013, 08:32 PM

I'm sure in tasteless fashion this thread will get a lot of jokes most of them won't be funny but oh well..

This girl I went to high school with made a depressing status on Facebook saying how she's given up. After talking with her in private she revealed she's going to lose her child in a custody battle and when she does she is going to kill herself. I've talked with her for 30 mins she said her mind is made up and it will be quick and painless.

Obviously my thought process is to call the authorities but here's the thing

A) what if she's over exaggerating the case. I call the police and then shell definitely lose the case.

B) She actually does follow through. Ill feel somewhat guilty.

What would you do in this situation?

BlackHelicopters · 08-04-2013, 06:08 AM

What method is she going to use that is quick and painless?

Nickel D · 08-04-2013, 06:23 AM

Antifreeze.

Lonewolf Ed · 08-04-2013, 06:33 AM

I went through something similar with a friend from school on FB. She wrote something cryptic about understanding her sister at last, who did commit suicide many years back, and something about hoping her daughter would understand. She also wrote about wishing she could change the pages already written in her "book" and that the story was over. Well, it turned out she is a hell of a drama queen, and after a few weeks of that sulking, she fell back in love with her man and everything was peachy again! Until the next time she went into dark drama mode...

That isn't to say the situation is the same in your friend's case, but my friend started up with that crap again and I changed it so I can't see anything she posts now. The last time she posted, "I hate him and I'm never trusting him again!!!!!!! (can't remember exactly how many ! she used, but it was more than I did...) that was the last straw. She is on permanent mute!

**Rausch** · 08-04-2013, 06:50 AM

Doesn't sound to stable.

Kid might be leaving for good reason...

Rasputin · 08-04-2013, 06:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rausch

Doesn't sound to stable.

Kid might be leaving for good reason...

This, the kids will be better off going to their dads. She needs get help for herself and get over it.

Mr_Tomahawk · 08-04-2013, 07:00 AM

Sounds like a great mother.

Mr_Tomahawk · 08-04-2013, 07:03 AM

Hydrae · 08-04-2013, 07:38 AM

Talk to her. Get her to talk about what is going on. She may not have anyone she can share this stressful time with and that is what is building up the pressure for her. Maybe just having a sympathetic ear will help her get past the darkness she is fighting now. She needs to be able to see the rest of the world and life, not just the depression of losing her child.

ghak99 · 08-04-2013, 08:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr_Tomahawk

Sully · 08-04-2013, 08:15 AM

I've discussed this story before...

When I was young, my parents divorced. At first, tey had joint custody, and everything was about 50/50.
As I went through junior high, my real mom began to really play up the single life. She was out a lot, brought people home late, even married a guy in order to keep him in the country. She also spent all my child support money on her own things.
Meanwhile, my dad remarried, moved into a nice place in a nice school district, and had a really stable place.
One Christmas, the plan was that I spent Christmas Eve with my dad and Christmas Day with my real mom. Christmas Eve went great, but the Christmas morning my mom picked me up and everything went to shit. My mom was on a tear, berating me for not being a good son, for being excited about the gifts my dad could buy me that she couldn't, etc. I was 12, and it took all the courage I had to tell her that I wasn't going to spend Christmas this way, and that she should take me back to my dad's.
The next day, I was back at my mom's. it was difficult and awkward. She proceeded to tell me, in great detail, how she had tried to kill herself the day before, putting the blame on me for abandoning her. You have no idea how that ****s with a 12-year ild's mind. I finally moved in with my father a few years later and cut off all contact with her for years. As I was in my 20s, we began to try and rebuild a relationship. Thing is, she was still the same. Guilt trips, not "getting enough" from me as her son, etc. after a particular weekend where she needed money and I had none to give, and refused to go to friends to borrow any, it happened again.
She called me asking me to come take her to the ER, because she was having "insulin problems." After a few hours at KU Med, it got weird. I was asked into a private room with a doctor and asked if I could be around her for a few days to keep an eye on her. I said I would, and figured it was a health issue. On the way home, though, she let me know she had tried to kill herself, and if I was a better son, she wouldn't have felt so hopeless.
It's been 10 years since we've had a relationship. We've talked a couple of times, but I refuse to expose myself, and now my family, to that type of abuse and manipulation. I am ****ed up in so many ways because of her.

My long-winded point is this...
Good. It's good she's losing custody. She's unable to be a stable influence on her child and can do more damage than good. I pray to God she doesn't take her life, and that she finds the help she needs. But my thoughts are with that kid, and hoping he or she doesn't have to go through the shit I have.
I don't have an answer for your question, but I just felt very strongly about this, and I apologize for the hijack.

Mrs. Loopner · 08-04-2013, 08:57 AM

You need to call the Suicide Hotline and tell them what you know. They know best how to handle it and will contact her.

Don't wait for someone else to call. That's like when the electricity goes off, you think someone else will then no one does.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SomeRandomGirl

Suicide Prevention

National Hopeline Center (800) SUICIDE (784-2433)

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800) 273-TALK (273-8255) (800) 799-4TTY (799-4889)

Pasta Little Brioni · 08-04-2013, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KC Tattoo

Fathers deserve to get the kids too. I have no sympathy for her if she loses custody of them kids.

It is devastating I know that, but it is about time the courts are fair to dads. She can get over her self pity pot and be supportive of the kids anyways by paying child support and get visit time with them.

Yup. She isn't entitled to shit just because she is female.

Titty Meat · 08-04-2013, 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sully

I've discussed this story before...

When I was young, my parents divorced. At first, tey had joint custody, and everything was about 50/50.
As I went through junior high, my real mom began to really play up the single life. She was out a lot, brought people home late, even married a guy in order to keep him in the country. She also spent all my child support money on her own things.
Meanwhile, my dad remarried, moved into a nice place in a nice school district, and had a really stable place.
One Christmas, the plan was that I spent Christmas Eve with my dad and Christmas Day with my real mom. Christmas Eve went great, but the Christmas morning my mom picked me up and everything went to shit. My mom was on a tear, berating me for not being a good son, for being excited about the gifts my dad could buy me that she couldn't, etc. I was 12, and it took all the courage I had to tell her that I wasn't going to spend Christmas this way, and that she should take me back to my dad's.
The next day, I was back at my mom's. it was difficult and awkward. She proceeded to tell me, in great detail, how she had tried to kill herself the day before, putting the blame on me for abandoning her. You have no idea how that ****s with a 12-year ild's mind. I finally moved in with my father a few years later and cut off all contact with her for years. As I was in my 20s, we began to try and rebuild a relationship. Thing is, she was still the same. Guilt trips, not "getting enough" from me as her son, etc. after a particular weekend where she needed money and I had none to give, and refused to go to friends to borrow any, it happened again.
She called me asking me to come take her to the ER, because she was having "insulin problems." After a few hours at KU Med, it got weird. I was asked into a private room with a doctor and asked if I could be around her for a few days to keep an eye on her. I said I would, and figured it was a health issue. On the way home, though, she let me know she had tried to kill herself, and if I was a better son, she wouldn't have felt so hopeless.
It's been 10 years since we've had a relationship. We've talked a couple of times, but I refuse to expose myself, and now my family, to that type of abuse and manipulation. I am ****ed up in so many ways because of her.

My long-winded point is this...
Good. It's good she's losing custody. She's unable to be a stable influence on her child and can do more damage than good. I pray to God she doesn't take her life, and that she finds the help she needs. But my thoughts are with that kid, and hoping he or she doesn't have to go through the shit I have.
I don't have an answer for your question, but I just felt very strongly about this, and I apologize for the hijack.

Holy shit man I'm sorry you went through all of that.

Sully · 08-04-2013, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bo's Pelini

Holy shit man I'm sorry you went through all of that.

I really don't say all that for sympathy. I just say it as someone who has (maybe) some insight to that type of situation. And someone who hopes beyond hope that this woman can get help, if she needs it, for her child... rather than leaving some pretty big scars.

Mr. Laz · 08-04-2013, 10:03 AM

calling the cops will ensure that she does lose the child and lead to more depression

keep talking to her, she wouldn't of told you if she didn't want attention

change subject a little bit ... slowly try to talk about less depressing stuff

don't try to get laid ... you're a man, don't act like it wasn't crossing your mind to be the hero and get some

need to contact a close friend and/or family of hers to get help with making a better support system for her

jmo

08-03-2013, 08:32 PM
Titty Meat Inmem 2.0 Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: My house Casino cash: $2307558	What do I do? I'm sure in tasteless fashion this thread will get a lot of jokes most of them won't be funny but oh well.. This girl I went to high school with made a depressing status on Facebook saying how she's given up. After talking with her in private she revealed she's going to lose her child in a custody battle and when she does she is going to kill herself. I've talked with her for 30 mins she said her mind is made up and it will be quick and painless. Obviously my thought process is to call the authorities but here's the thing A) what if she's over exaggerating the case. I call the police and then shell definitely lose the case. B) She actually does follow through. Ill feel somewhat guilty. What would you do in this situation?
Posts: 75,057

08-04-2013, 06:08 AM	#46
BlackHelicopters Spiraling down the Drain Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Dante's Ninth Circle Casino cash: $2740588	What method is she going to use that is quick and painless? __________________ "We're both part of the same hypocrisy, Senator, but never think it applies to my family." "Fredo. You are my brother, and I love you. But never take sides against the Family again. Ever." 2019 Adopt a Chief - Travis Kelce #87 Last edited by BlackHelicopters; 08-04-2013 at 06:25 AM..
Posts: 31,661

08-04-2013, 06:23 AM	#47
Nickel D Veteran Join Date: Mar 2011 Casino cash: $11006781	Antifreeze.
Posts: 1,321

08-04-2013, 06:33 AM	#48
Lonewolf Ed Veteran Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Olathe, KS Casino cash: $10606233	I went through something similar with a friend from school on FB. She wrote something cryptic about understanding her sister at last, who did commit suicide many years back, and something about hoping her daughter would understand. She also wrote about wishing she could change the pages already written in her "book" and that the story was over. Well, it turned out she is a hell of a drama queen, and after a few weeks of that sulking, she fell back in love with her man and everything was peachy again! Until the next time she went into dark drama mode... That isn't to say the situation is the same in your friend's case, but my friend started up with that crap again and I changed it so I can't see anything she posts now. The last time she posted, "I hate him and I'm never trusting him again!!!!!!! (can't remember exactly how many ! she used, but it was more than I did...) that was the last straw. She is on permanent mute!
Posts: 3,774

08-04-2013, 07:00 AM	#51
Mr_Tomahawk Prestige Worldwide Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Spring Hill, KS Casino cash: $3070526	Sounds like a great mother. __________________ Adopt-A-Chief: John Dorsey
Posts: 18,384

08-04-2013, 07:03 AM	#52
Mr_Tomahawk Prestige Worldwide Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Spring Hill, KS Casino cash: $3070526	__________________ Adopt-A-Chief: John Dorsey
Posts: 18,384

08-04-2013, 07:38 AM	#53
Hydrae Sandbox: Leander Lasercats Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Austin, Tx Casino cash: $2357000	Talk to her. Get her to talk about what is going on. She may not have anyone she can share this stressful time with and that is what is building up the pressure for her. Maybe just having a sympathetic ear will help her get past the darkness she is fighting now. She needs to be able to see the rest of the world and life, not just the depression of losing her child.
Posts: 14,684

08-04-2013, 08:15 AM	#55
Sully It Goes On Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Lees Summit Casino cash: $10026331	I've discussed this story before... When I was young, my parents divorced. At first, tey had joint custody, and everything was about 50/50. As I went through junior high, my real mom began to really play up the single life. She was out a lot, brought people home late, even married a guy in order to keep him in the country. She also spent all my child support money on her own things. Meanwhile, my dad remarried, moved into a nice place in a nice school district, and had a really stable place. One Christmas, the plan was that I spent Christmas Eve with my dad and Christmas Day with my real mom. Christmas Eve went great, but the Christmas morning my mom picked me up and everything went to shit. My mom was on a tear, berating me for not being a good son, for being excited about the gifts my dad could buy me that she couldn't, etc. I was 12, and it took all the courage I had to tell her that I wasn't going to spend Christmas this way, and that she should take me back to my dad's. The next day, I was back at my mom's. it was difficult and awkward. She proceeded to tell me, in great detail, how she had tried to kill herself the day before, putting the blame on me for abandoning her. You have no idea how that **s with a 12-year ild's mind. I finally moved in with my father a few years later and cut off all contact with her for years. As I was in my 20s, we began to try and rebuild a relationship. Thing is, she was still the same. Guilt trips, not "getting enough" from me as her son, etc. after a particular weekend where she needed money and I had none to give, and refused to go to friends to borrow any, it happened again. She called me asking me to come take her to the ER, because she was having "insulin problems." After a few hours at KU Med, it got weird. I was asked into a private room with a doctor and asked if I could be around her for a few days to keep an eye on her. I said I would, and figured it was a health issue. On the way home, though, she let me know she had tried to kill herself, and if I was a better son, she wouldn't have felt so hopeless. It's been 10 years since we've had a relationship. We've talked a couple of times, but I refuse to expose myself, and now my family, to that type of abuse and manipulation. I am **ed up in so many ways because of her. My long-winded point is this... Good. It's good she's losing custody. She's unable to be a stable influence on her child and can do more damage than good. I pray to God she doesn't take her life, and that she finds the help she needs. But my thoughts are with that kid, and hoping he or she doesn't have to go through the shit I have. I don't have an answer for your question, but I just felt very strongly about this, and I apologize for the hijack. __________________ "And I don't wish that girl any bad luck," he said, "but I hope she gets hit with a car." - Tommy Lasorda
Posts: 18,295

08-04-2013, 10:03 AM	#60
Mr. Laz Don't Tease Me Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: KS Casino cash: $11047037	calling the cops will ensure that she does lose the child and lead to more depression keep talking to her, she wouldn't of told you if she didn't want attention change subject a little bit ... slowly try to talk about less depressing stuff don't try to get laid ... you're a man, don't act like it wasn't crossing your mind to be the hero and get some need to contact a close friend and/or family of hers to get help with making a better support system for her jmo __________________
Posts: 95,626