I've only been here a short time, and I'm pretty sure the only thing going DOWN is your penis. Again. As in, "drooping with sadness at another unfulfilled night".

Here's a tip: right before a date, whack off. And then whack off again. And then do it a third time. That way, your kiwis will be empty and you'll feel less of a need to be a manipulative sex-obsessed f**ktard on the date, and instead will actually do all sorts of weird shit, like "talk to her as if she's a real person and not a sperm receptacle" and "try to build a rapport and connection with her". I know. It's a wild idea. Give it a whirl sometime, though.

Unless, of course, you're just looking to get your pink flashlight tugged on, and you're not looking for an actual girlfriend. If that's the case, just go to a hooker once a month. The amount of time and money you seem to spend on fruitless dates, it would probably be cheaper.

I hope you're able to keep it up this time.

"Ooh, yeah, baby, c'mon, let's unbuckle these jeans so I can... uh oh... oops! Aww, don't worry 'bout it baby, it happens to everyone, let's just get you cleaned up..." LMAO

:LOL:

whiskey dick...when your in your 20s for someone that doesn't "drink" ....
bad nerves or the "hair" trigger. ROFL

i can't believe this thread is still going

No shit. I barely even remember the date I went on that I actually started this thread about.

Well, dinner was lovely! What a delightful young woman! We tentatively scheduled another meeting for Wednesday!

Also, this ice cream is delicious!

Sex before marriage is wrong!

Put your penis in her laddie .. she'll buy next time ....

LMAO

If you stick your pee-pee in the ice cream, it'll make the swelling go down. LMAO

http://static.reelmovienews.com/imag...heenanajar.jpg

And in these conjugal visits....you can have sex with women?

I was going to try to read this whole thing to see how it went, but after looking at this response... ya'll prolly ain't married, huh?

Three hours door to door on a Saturday night date? Good luck getting the next date to materialize.

Just as a point of reference on how they're supposed to go, my 2nd date last night ran from 8 until 4.

lol, we had a one-hour dinner date.

That was it.

Little girls shouldn't waste my time.

(GODDAMMIT WHERE ARE THE SLUTTY ONES?!?!?!)

Dude, go for the 21+ chicks. Alcohol is your friend.

I was out with 29, 22, 19 this week.

The 29-year old was the most physical...lol....

The key is to hang onto the Ice-Cream Social Girl.

The Sluts will only let you down..

That is the way to do it. Just meet for lunch.

If you both connect you will know. If not then you met a person seeking romance as you. Wish her the best and go on.

Why should he care how much it costs? It doesn't cost him anything. His mom pays for it. Seriously.

lol, that would be embarrassing. I assure you I pay my own way.

Paper route?

I rip tickets at the tilt-a-whirl!

And give head on the side.

Guess I have another date. Tonight. roflcopter

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Well, I just got dumped in the middle of a date for the first time. Un-****ing-believable.

I meet this girl at the movie theater - that's all I wanted, some company for the moves, and something else, too, heh heh - and she's totally smoking. Drop-dead hottie. Only five feet tall, too, which I love. Anyway, she smiles and says "You look just like your pic!" Yes, bitch, I'm hot and you love it. High five.

So we go into the move theater and have a nice enough chat. It's not awkward, I put my arm around her and the movie begins. We laugh and talk about the movie.

About an hour into it, she says she's going out to get a drink and go to the bathroom. Cool, fine.

10 minutes pass....no girl.

20 minutes pass...no girl.

The movie ends...where the **** is she?

I go out into the lobby, she's nowhere to be found. Text her "u leave??" No reply, I leave, pissed the **** off, what the **** just happened, what a bitch, she has no soul. OMFG. I call Simply Red and whine to him for awhile. He's my intellectual whore.

Anyway, what the ****. Women can be total ****s. Was she married? Was she using me for a free movie? Who the **** knows.

Time for some ****ing ice cream.

And "surrogates" sucked ass. But in a good way.

Ouch. I've been on some awful dates, but at least both of us were nice enough to see it through.

Ditched while watching a shitty movie. ROFL

Also, the bitch I went out with Saturday apparently doesn't care for me either, despite agreeing to see me again.

WOMEN HATE ME
http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...uy_suicide.gif

Why the **** would she wait an hour to leave?

I've had things like that happen to me a few times, its horrible! I laugh about it now but back then it felt awful.

Too soon, and the going to the bathroom excuse seems forced.

Eh, brush that bitch off.

Have some "me" time and go to sleep.

Some chicks are just flakes.

Maybe she was cheating on her husband and felt guilty and decided otherwise?

Who the **** knows.

Women...can't live with 'em and they can't pee standin' up.

LOL, you must be doing something to creep them out..

Without question.

I'm getting really insecure about it. I should find some girl to go out with and tell me what the **** is wrong.

Do you have any female friends that can help you with this?

lol, there's luv

And I'm sure Amanda would do it but she lives in Austin...and probably wants to bone me...I'm not interested in her that way.

It was the arm around her thing.
No woman wants to feel like she's with a possible stalker/possessive type.

Chill with the "having to touch people" and let things run it's course.
If she's into you it'll happen. If not then she won't up and leave since you didn't smother her with your arm/affection.

Less is more.

Yeah, I doubt it. She said her back hurt in the position she was in and I removed my arm about 10 minutes into the movie.

She left waaaaaaaaay after.

By the way, I could just NOT make a move at all...you know, the thing I got criticized for when I took the last girl to a movie.

DAMNED IF I DO
DAMNED IF I DON'T

http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/i...uy_suicide.gif

Handing the 16 year old at the box office your mother's money isn't the same as paying your own way.

You don't (read: never) have a job.
You live in your mother's basement that she pays for....
You use utilities that your mother pays for....
You eat food that she pays for....
You wear clothes that she pays for....
You drive a car that she paid for....
You have car insurance that she pays for....
You use gas that she pays for....
You type on a computer that she paid for....
You text on a phone that she pays for....
And yet you you expect us to believe that you pay for your movie tickets and dates?

The reason why you get dropped in the middle of a date is because women smell that momma's leech stench coming off of you. It is overpowering and you can't hide it. Until you grow up, welcome to the rest of your life.

Fat Elvis knows everything about my life apparently...

Trust me... I'm spot on.
Her back hurting was an excuse for you to get your big ass arm off of her 5 foot frame. No matter when she left... she wasn't feeling your overbearing demeanor.

you really need to hit on chicks in person instead of meeting them over the net. You need some face to face success.

I put my arm on her for five minutes and I'm overbearing.

Crock of shit.

And it's still hypocritical given the advice I received the last time I was in a movie theater with a girl.

Not hypocritical from me...
1st off... movie = date.
Date = relationship/get to know someone.

If you want to hit it... you gotta stop doing these get to know people dates.

Safe dates for booty calls.
clubbin or over someone's house to watch a movie or drinkin with someone. That's about it.

These freakin dinner dates 9 times outta 10 isn't going to get you any ass.
In the long run maybe but that's too much effort for someone that just wants some ass.
You'll disregard my logic or ideology but you're the one keep doing dumb stuff that doesn't add up or make sense.

Eh, I went "clubbing" last week with a girl.

No ass.

And I got closer to getting ass after a dinner date with a girl....so it's a crapshoot either way.

Do you bathe regularly? Just covering all the bases.

And don't tell her how you spent all last weekend making egg salad.
Posted via Mobile Device

I don't think it is just women..... FYI.

GoChiefs:

Buy a Corvette. Take a girl out in said Corvette. You will get laid that night.

His mom can't afford a Corvette.

Feel free to correct me where I am mistaken. For starters, name your job. Secondly, where do you live?

Put those two together and it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that the rest just kind of falls in place.

Yeah and make sure you wear your collar popped and the aviator shades all through the date, if your going with the Vette advice you might as well go full on douchebag.

Wow. Really? Are you sure? There are some really good deals out there on good condition used models.

Douchebag or not, most chicks dig 'em. And that's what makes the world go 'round.

Sorry bro but the Wutabrutha is right on the money. First of all the arm around the lady thing is played out. Especially on the first date. Seems stalkerish. Second, the same gameplan doesn't work with the same chicks. You have to read the vibes from her. She may not like some stranger's paws all over her five minutes into the date. But on the other hand it was way bad form for her to bail on the date and just split. Classless really. My rule (when I was single)was always that movies make for bad dates. Virtually no way to get to know your date, much less score. I mean how can you throw any game at her in the dark where you can't talk or make her laugh? You are learning and making progress though. Good luck next time!!!
Posted via Mobile Device

Very well. You are mistaken.

This!

That way you get shot down BEFORE you spend money on them!

Any chance your date snuck back in and sat somewhere else so she could finish the movie? You were just a free pass in?

I'll bet she just sat somewhere else to finish the movie.

Just for future reference, movie dates are for married people who don't have to make an effort anymore. Don't take women to movies anymore, that's a lame, lame date. I don't care if it's her idea and blahblahblah. Don't do that anymore.

A movie is a HORRIBLE idea for a 1st date, IMO.

Heh, I was actually gonna say that. Luv seems like she has a head on her shoulders, might be a good idea.

I just find it hilarious that we all experienced this between 8th-11th grade, but GOChiefs is finally getting around to it in his late 20s.

To be fair, puberty doesn't hit everyone at the same time.

Dude. You DO realize that most chicks, even dumb blonde ones, have enough gray matter between their ears to Google you before a date, right? To make sure you're not a serial killer? And you do know that said Googling will bring them right to this site, right? Where your exploits, or lack thereof, are legendary? And people call you a momma's boy, and you act like women are nothing but semen receptacles? Gee, I wonder why you have such a hard time.

And, yes, by the way, putting the moves on a chick on a first date at the movies is pretty slimy.

Women can smell desperation. It's like a bad cologne.

You want to get laid? Stop trying to get laid.

You want to meet chicks and date them? Stop trying to meet chicks and date them.

Trust me. It's bizarre backwards logic, but it works. When you give up on the idea, and don't seem so desperate, women will flock to you. They can sense a man who's secure in himself. Why do you think so many married guys attract attention from women? Or, if a guy's single, he can't find chicks, but if he has a chick then OTHER chicks suddenly want him?

Of course, the other option is to try some penis. Because your whole problem could be that you're gay. I'm serious here. Women have the same issue; many lesbians think they're straight, or that they should be straight, because that's how they were raised, and they have unfulfilling relationships with boyfriends and even husbands, until they finally try some hair pie and realize what the issue was all allong. So do it, man. Just one. Suck a dick. See if it works for ya. I'm just here to help. :)

ROFL

JD has a solid point. have u ever tried to find something like a tape measure, batteries, etc around the house? Then, just when u decide to give up and stop looking, u find the item(s)? Stop trying so hard to get laid! There is truth to the "women can sense desperation".

LMAO

I think he has a better point about GoChiefs being gay; the guy did have the name "Meatpeeker" after all....

This is true, but don't forget the gazillion variables that accompany th^t

I was like him, once. Sure, I was only 22 at the time, LOL, but still. I'd never been on a date. I couldn't attract girls if I had a roll of $100s around my neck. I was pissed off, morose, lonely, desperate. So I made the decision finally, I said, "F**k it. I don't care any more. I'm gonna stop trying. Women don't like me, and that's all there is to it. So what. It'll mean a lot of :whackit: and it'll be cheaper to dine out 'cause I'm not paying for someone. Whatever." And, literally, as soon as I made that decision, my attitude improved, I stopped giving off the SENSE of desperation, and I found a girlfriend. During that relationship, I learned how to actually talk to other women, as if they weren't "women, the prospective semen receptacles" but just "human with boobs and a vajayjay". (In other words, how to talk to women normally, as if friends, without any sex pressure underlying things.) When that relationship ended, after years, I said, "Oh, well, no big, maybe I'll find another and maybe I won't." Boom! Second one right away, that one also lasted for years.

Women KNOW if you're desperate. They KNOW if you're out for nothing but sex. And if that's the vibe they get, they probably won't give it to you. Unless they're real sluts, LOL. But he can't seem to find those either. :) But, then again, that's part of his issue, I think. In the first place, he doesn't know if he's looking for sex or a girlfriend. In the second place, I'm not sure if he knows if he likes men or women. No wonder he's having issues.

I d/k. He's really chauvinistic when it comes to women. Referring to them as "bitches" and "hoes", etc. Gay men don't do that... well unless they're putting on an act to look macho. Hmmmmmm. :hmmm:

that sucks

"do U liek me? circle one. yes no"

:LOL: Whoa, I just had a flashback.

The two of them should just hook up and get it over with!

Damn Clay I have never been dumped like that. I would be embarrassed if I was you. :D

I agree with the others that movie dates aren't very good unless you follow the right plan.

Next time try this:

1. Dinner
2. Movie
3. Bed

It was pretty funny, actually....she asked me if I was gay right before the movie started....I was like, WTF!

Are you really this reeruned?

I don't do that in real life.

Ding. Ding. Ding. That is a definite indication that the date wasn't going to pan out. Regardless, that was a shitty thing for her to just leave. Did she ever respond to ur txt?