News Clinically Depressed Poodle Mauls Former French President Chirac

R&GHomer · 01-22-2009, 01:38 PM

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,481426,00.html

What kind of wussy gets mauled by a poodle. Laughing so hard I'm about to pee myself.

Former French President Jacques Chirac was rushed to a hospital after being mauled by his pet dog who is being treated for depression, in a dramatic incident that rattled the ex-president's wife.

The couple's white Maltese poodle, called Sumo, has a history of frenzied fits and became increasingly prone to making "vicious, unprovoked attacks" despite receiving treatment with anti-depressants, Chirac's wife Bernadette said.

"If you only knew! I had a dramatic day yesterday," she told VSD magazine. "Sumo bit my husband!"

Mrs. Chirac, 74, did not reveal where the former president was bitten, but said, "the dog went for him for no apparent reason."

"We were aware the animal was unpredictable and is being treated with pills for depression. My husband was bitten quite badly but he is certain to make a full recovery in weeks."

Chirac was taken to a hospital in Paris where he was treated as an outpatient and later sent home.

The 76-year-old was president of France for 12 years until 2007.

Pablo · 01-22-2009, 01:41 PM

How exactly does one get 'mauled' by a poodle?

Rooster · 01-22-2009, 01:42 PM

Now that is change I can believe in. Thanks Obama.

R&GHomer · 01-22-2009, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GonzoRox88

How exactly does one get 'mauled' by a poodle?

Guess the poodle wasn't willing to accept his surrender.

**morphius** · 01-22-2009, 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GonzoRox88

How exactly does one get 'mauled' by a poodle?

In his defence the dogs white color confused him into thinking the dog was actually giving up, as the French are so well known to do.

Or is it taking bribes, I can't remember which.

seclark · 01-22-2009, 01:51 PM

if big daddy were here...
sec

jwazzie · 01-22-2009, 01:44 PM

This is why people make fun of France, they think they are a power, but where your former PM has to go to the hospital because of a crazy bitch bite, you are put down in the standings as a power.

**Donger** · 01-22-2009, 01:44 PM

Of course. I presume the poodle is white?

Otter · 01-22-2009, 01:45 PM

You know what's even funnier? Do an image search on Maltese poodle.

seclark · 01-22-2009, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Otter

You know what's even funnier? Do an image search on Maltese poodle.

vicious looking bastards
sec

**DeezNutz** · 01-22-2009, 01:50 PM

Standard Poodles are actually ass kickers, believe it or not.

A Maltese Poodle, on the other hand, doesn't sound too tough...

R&GHomer · 01-22-2009, 01:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeezNutz

Standard Poodles are actually ass kickers, believe it or not.

A Maltese Poodle, on the other hand, doesn't sound too tough...

LOL.. ok, if you say so. I would have been practicing 50 yrd field goals with its little azz.

Radar Chief · 01-22-2009, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by R&GHomer

LOL.. ok, if you say so. I would have been practicing 50 yrd field goals with its little azz.

A “maltese poodle” you could, but a regular poodle is about the size of the average yellow lab. Not a big dog, but not small either.

**DeezNutz** · 01-22-2009, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Radar Chief

A “maltese poodle” you could, but a regular poodle is about the size of the average yellow lab. Not a big dog, but not small either.

Standards are usually around 50-60 lbs, but they offer legit protection for their owners.

Chief Faithful · 01-22-2009, 03:51 PM

Can somebody please send President Chirac some antifreeze so he can resolve the issue with the depressed Poodle?

01-22-2009, 01:38 PM	Topic Starter
R&GHomer Veteran Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Olathe Casino cash: $10004900	Clinically Depressed Poodle Mauls Former French President Chirac http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,481426,00.html What kind of wussy gets mauled by a poodle. Laughing so hard I'm about to pee myself. Former French President Jacques Chirac was rushed to a hospital after being mauled by his pet dog who is being treated for depression, in a dramatic incident that rattled the ex-president's wife. The couple's white Maltese poodle, called Sumo, has a history of frenzied fits and became increasingly prone to making "vicious, unprovoked attacks" despite receiving treatment with anti-depressants, Chirac's wife Bernadette said. "If you only knew! I had a dramatic day yesterday," she told VSD magazine. "Sumo bit my husband!" Mrs. Chirac, 74, did not reveal where the former president was bitten, but said, "the dog went for him for no apparent reason." "We were aware the animal was unpredictable and is being treated with pills for depression. My husband was bitten quite badly but he is certain to make a full recovery in weeks." Chirac was taken to a hospital in Paris where he was treated as an outpatient and later sent home. The 76-year-old was president of France for 12 years until 2007.
Posts: 3,900

01-22-2009, 01:41 PM	#2
Pablo Ultrabanned Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Northland Casino cash: $-1660644	How exactly does one get 'mauled' by a poodle?
Posts: 43,789

01-22-2009, 01:42 PM	#3
Rooster Draft a QB Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: JoCo Casino cash: $9961689	Now that is change I can believe in. Thanks Obama. __________________ When Reno Hightower was a prick he was the best damn quarterback in the history of Kern County.
Posts: 5,753

01-22-2009, 01:51 PM	#6
seclark MVP Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: nemo Casino cash: $-410100	if big daddy were here... sec __________________ "Mr. seclark. Wrong for gravy, wrong for jelly, wrong for biscuits." -rj "If every Planeteer who was disliked by another Planeteer stopped being a Planeteer we wouldn't have any Planeteers." -rj
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01-22-2009, 01:44 PM	#7
jwazzie Big Headed Baby Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Somewhere in the US Casino cash: $10004607	This is why people make fun of France, they think they are a power, but where your former PM has to go to the hospital because of a crazy bitch bite, you are put down in the standings as a power.
Posts: 465

01-22-2009, 01:44 PM	#8
Donger "Think BOOM!" Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: 33.675° N 106.475° W Casino cash: $6949900 VARSITY	Of course. I presume the poodle is white? __________________ I think the young people enjoy it when I "get down," verbally, don't you?
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01-22-2009, 03:51 PM	#15
Chief Faithful Predicting Chiefs Victory Join Date: Sep 2001 Casino cash: $9966500	Can somebody please send President Chirac some antifreeze so he can resolve the issue with the depressed Poodle?
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