The sluttiest girl at Penn State.

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IT'S THE MOST UNIVERSAL THING...IN THE WORLD!

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Let's talk sex, hugs and handjobs

By Kristina Helfer
Collegian Staff Writer

By now — my junior year of college — I have seen and been involved in some unusual romantic and even casual circumstances.

Though I am only 20, I feel like I am finally beginning to figure out human physiology… and maybe even relationships. You could say I’ve been around the block a few times, but I’m still experiencing new things every day, especially in Happy Valley, on the weekends.

I love sex.

I love talking about it, I love having it, and I’m sure I’m not the only one, male or female, who feels the same way.

Someday, all of us will be having sex — unless you’re still living in your mom’s basement — and it won’t be a big deal.

Maybe you’re having sex right now, while you’re reading this column (lucky you), maybe you had it last night, or maybe you’ve never had it at all, but sex is all around us.

We’re at the point in our lives when we are coming into our sexuality.

We’re learning the mating game.

Who knows, between hook-ups and the need to be “Facebook official,” we might even be the generation that completely kills relationships.

Have you had dirty thoughts about that cute kid at your internship? Have you wondered what your partner would say if you wanted to have sex on the 50-yard-line?

Well, I have, too.

Often, sex is taboo. We can’t discuss what goes on behind the closed doors of the bedroom,

or in my case, under a crabapple tree once.

If you’ve ever watched MTV’s Cribs, you know the first thing anyone says when they enter their bedroom is, “This is where the magic happens.”

Do they really need to say that? Are they sure they’re good enough to really call it magic?

At Penn State, it’s more than in the bedroom — it’s a lofted bed, a walk-in closet at a fraternity or the Nittany Lion Shrine.

For some, it’s a moment of true intimacy, for others it’s just another good night.

Sex is the most universal thing in the entire world. Almost every species — except for asexual ones — has sex in one form or another.

We were given these parts for a reason, so why not take advantage of them?

The thrill of having sex is like nothing else. It’s exciting, and everyone’s talking about it.

College is the time when those whispers become a reality, when people take others’ virginity and roommates are sexiled.

And it’s about time we start talking about it.

I’m not going to tell you to change your beliefs and go crazy, but it’s time to start being open.

It’s time to break society’s chains (or not), and look at sex from a different perspective.

Losing control draws me toward all of this.

I am not a thrill seeker, per se. I hate heights; I will never go skydiving. I don’t ski or mountain bike or do any sort of extreme sports that give you the “rush” people describe, so I have sex.

Don’t think for a minute that sex is a less dangerous version of an extreme sport.

And frankly, I don’t think any extreme sport could give you the feeling that a white-knuckle, toe-curling orgasm does.

The pleasure runs up and down your entire body, and just for a moment — or if you’re lucky, quite a few moments — you disconnect from the stressful world.

There is no better time to have a little fun and explore than in college.

We have few responsibilities, and there will never be as many willing people around to experience the same things with.

It’s also the time when were most unsure about how to go about sex.

I doubt any of us can call ourselves sex aficionados, so let’s dive into a sea of fondling, fellatio and frisking, and figure it out.

Let’s get our minds — and hopefully pelvises — moving, and really delve into what’s important.

Everyone has that crazy story or awkward encounter with a partner that is worthy of being told, and I can relate, so let’s talk about sex, hugs and hand jobs.

You may have thought you could drain away all of your weekend shenanigans, just like that beer bong at last weekend’s football tailgate, but I am here bring them back to the surface.

We are Nittany Lions.

And we’re mounting everyone.

Kristina Helfer is a junior majoring in English and Spanish. She is The Daily Collegian’s Thursday columnist for the Collegian’s sex column, Mounting Nittany.