Chiefs Late night bullshit: Direckshun is a slut bucket.

**RealSNR** · 09-24-2014, 09:30 PM

29. Direckshun

Welcome to the LNBS Lounge, where tonight Direckshun is the guest of honor.

These threads usually go one of two ways depending on the topic. If it's a football thread, Direckshun will lay out a detailed and well-considered blueprint or opinion that begins with something reasonable like, "The Chiefs need to get better secondary help" and will devolve into crazy bullshit such as, "Kurt Coleman is going to be the key to a successful playoff run at the playoffs." If it's a non-football topic, he'll project his real life cosplay interests into the discussion parameters. For example, he'll pretend to be a bartender who listens to your problems. Or he'll be the engineer of a magical train that will take you back to any moment in your life that you'd most like to re-live.

Tonight we're not doing either of those things. We're going to skip his stupid folksy-nouveau way of conversing, where you call a random stranger "my brother" or say "swing and a miss" when people say something that doesn't line up.

Tonight we're going to rape Direckshun. He seems like a nice person, but he frustrates us all in so many special and varied ways. I'd like us to share those Direckshun moments with each other, whatever they may be.

Since I'm supposed to be roasting him, I'll go first. Feel free to share as much or as little as you want.

1. Direckshun talks like a ****ing weirdo

Usually shows up as a symptom when involved in a political conversation with a surly opponent. He talks to the guy like he's a character from a Homestar Runner cartoon who is physically in the same room as the person he's talking to. "Pete. Pete. Listen to me. Stop saying words." He's also awful at insults, even just as playful jabs. I think he once said, "SNR eats whale dung." That's weird.

2. Direckshun never fights back

Direckshun is great for this forum in many ways because he generates content and conversation, especially in football matters. He's like a bad-tasting oral laxative when CP is having trouble passing football topics onto the front page. But he's got his share of dumb ideas, and he has plenty of people like Clay who will mercilessly tear into him even when it's not warranted. Milkman calls him a dumbass. How does Direckshun respond? "Hoho, you're probably right. I CAN get carried away with my mocks, can't I? I'll take your advise and shut the **** up next time!" He won't defend his idea politely or even leave a nice little "Blow me."

3. From the tone of his posts, you can tell that he's a stupid hipster

I've never read a Direckshun post where I couldn't smell the PBR stench in the wifi that transmitted it to my computer screen. Every time he writes something, it's got that shitty subtley ironic tone. The dolphin wearing a helmet thread? I actually like that thread. I love comedic false outrage threads. But when Direckshun does it, he somehow makes it... trendy. I could see him and his shitty beard (come on, you just KNOW he ****ing has one) trying to start some Rob Schneider catch phrase around the office or wherever the **** he works. "Because we're the Chiefs." It's even worse now because he's got all of YOU ****ing saying it. Now whenever he posts some awful shitty prediction, as long as it's glass-half-empty, he can say "Because we're the Chiefs" to justify it, and everybody will go along with it.

That's all I got for now. When I think of more, I'll post them and update this OP, because that's something easy and quick that I can do for any person who might enjoy this thread.

Snapplez · 09-24-2014, 09:34 PM

Sweet Daddy Hate · 09-24-2014, 09:35 PM

Man, that's suaav'e

**TribalElder** · 09-24-2014, 09:36 PM

Hell yeah, the OP has been updated

lcarus · 09-24-2014, 09:37 PM

Direckshun you ignorant slut

Mennonite · 09-24-2014, 09:39 PM

I hate it when people make animated gifs from scenes that don't have any action. What's the point of this? Why not just make a still pic?

I suppose if you couldn't see Jeff Goldblum's lips moving some people might get confused by the subtitles and think that the massive heap of manure was making a snide remark about Goldblum.

rico · 09-24-2014, 09:43 PM

rico · 09-24-2014, 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mennonite

I hate it when people make animated gifs from scenes that don't have any action. What's the point of this? Why not just make a still pic?

I suppose if you couldn't see Jeff Goldblum's lips moving some people might get confused by the subtitles and think that the massive heap of manure was making a snide remark about Goldblum.

Be afraid of Jeff Goldblum. Be very afraid of Jeff Goldblum.

**TribalElder** · 09-24-2014, 09:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rico

Is that Alfs methhead cousin?

Dante84 · 09-24-2014, 09:47 PM

I quite like Direckshun.

Rasputin · 09-24-2014, 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rico

Be afraid of Jeff Goldblum. Be very afraid of Jeff Goldblum.

**SAUTO** · 09-24-2014, 09:53 PM

Way too low on the list
Posted via Mobile Device

rico · 09-24-2014, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TribalElder

Is that Alfs methhead cousin?

No, thats's Direckshun's furry cousin. Both are part of the Bucket family along with his previously poverty stricken (before finding that golden ticket), white-trash cousin, Charlie Bucket:

**RealSNR** · 09-24-2014, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rico

No, thats's Direckshun's furry cousin. Both are part of the Bucket family along with his previously poverty stricken (before finding that golden ticket), white-trash cousin, Charlie Bucket:

That explains why Mr. Bucket wants you to put your balls into him. He must be Direckshun's uncle.

Direckshun · 09-24-2014, 10:06 PM

*whispers quietly as he lays his head to rest*

Joffrey. Tywin Lannister. The Mountain. SNR.

09-24-2014, 09:30 PM
RealSNR Special Teams ACE!!! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Where the hell is SNR Casino cash: $-1294792	Late night bullshit: Direckshun is a slut bucket. 29. Direckshun Welcome to the LNBS Lounge, where tonight Direckshun is the guest of honor. These threads usually go one of two ways depending on the topic. If it's a football thread, Direckshun will lay out a detailed and well-considered blueprint or opinion that begins with something reasonable like, "The Chiefs need to get better secondary help" and will devolve into crazy bullshit such as, "Kurt Coleman is going to be the key to a successful playoff run at the playoffs." If it's a non-football topic, he'll project his real life cosplay interests into the discussion parameters. For example, he'll pretend to be a bartender who listens to your problems. Or he'll be the engineer of a magical train that will take you back to any moment in your life that you'd most like to re-live. Tonight we're not doing either of those things. We're going to skip his stupid folksy-nouveau way of conversing, where you call a random stranger "my brother" or say "swing and a miss" when people say something that doesn't line up. Tonight we're going to rape Direckshun. He seems like a nice person, but he frustrates us all in so many special and varied ways. I'd like us to share those Direckshun moments with each other, whatever they may be. Since I'm supposed to be roasting him, I'll go first. Feel free to share as much or as little as you want. 1. Direckshun talks like a ing weirdo Usually shows up as a symptom when involved in a political conversation with a surly opponent. He talks to the guy like he's a character from a Homestar Runner cartoon who is physically in the same room as the person he's talking to. "Pete. Pete. Listen to me. Stop saying words." He's also awful at insults, even just as playful jabs. I think he once said, "SNR eats whale dung." That's weird. 2. Direckshun never fights back Direckshun is great for this forum in many ways because he generates content and conversation, especially in football matters. He's like a bad-tasting oral laxative when CP is having trouble passing football topics onto the front page. But he's got his share of dumb ideas, and he has plenty of people like Clay who will mercilessly tear into him even when it's not warranted. Milkman calls him a dumbass. How does Direckshun respond? "Hoho, you're probably right. I CAN get carried away with my mocks, can't I? I'll take your advise and shut the ** up next time!" He won't defend his idea politely or even leave a nice little "Blow me." 3. From the tone of his posts, you can tell that he's a stupid hipster I've never read a Direckshun post where I couldn't smell the PBR stench in the wifi that transmitted it to my computer screen. Every time he writes something, it's got that shitty subtley ironic tone. The dolphin wearing a helmet thread? I actually like that thread. I love comedic false outrage threads. But when Direckshun does it, he somehow makes it... trendy. I could see him and his shitty beard (come on, you just KNOW he ing has one) trying to start some Rob Schneider catch phrase around the office or wherever the he works. "Because we're the Chiefs." It's even worse now because he's got all of YOU **ing saying it. Now whenever he posts some awful shitty prediction, as long as it's glass-half-empty, he can say "Because we're the Chiefs" to justify it, and everybody will go along with it. That's all I got for now. When I think of more, I'll post them and update this OP, because that's something easy and quick that I can do for any person who might enjoy this thread.
Posts: 93,267

09-24-2014, 09:34 PM	#2
Snapplez Starter Join Date: Aug 2013 Location: Ft. Worth, TX Casino cash: $10027795	Tru
Posts: 588

09-24-2014, 09:35 PM	#3
Sweet Daddy Hate Unsparing Join Date: Aug 2008 Casino cash: $10004900	Man, that's suaav'e __________________ 1. Merciless, severe. 2. Given freely and generously. 100% refusal to overrate 20 year Head Coaches with ZERO **ing rings as a Head Coach. CP's Official Professor of 'Dem Blues for 2019/2020!**
Posts: 77,135

09-24-2014, 09:36 PM	#4
TribalElder Arrowhead Trail of Tears Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: KansasCity Casino cash: $-449559	Hell yeah, the OP has been updated __________________ Pressure is a privilege, and champions adjust
Posts: 29,545

09-24-2014, 09:37 PM	#5
lcarus Everybody Lies. Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Casino cash: $-1709887	Direckshun you ignorant slut
Posts: 17,816

09-24-2014, 09:39 PM	#6
Mennonite Veteran Join Date: Jun 2014 Casino cash: $10258572	I hate it when people make animated gifs from scenes that don't have any action. What's the point of this? Why not just make a still pic? I suppose if you couldn't see Jeff Goldblum's lips moving some people might get confused by the subtitles and think that the massive heap of manure was making a snide remark about Goldblum.
Posts: 3,378

09-24-2014, 09:47 PM	#10
Dante84 Tossed Salad & Scrambled Eggs Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: ATX & OPKS Casino cash: $-1828004 VARSITY	I quite like Direckshun. __________________ ..
Posts: 20,446

09-24-2014, 09:53 PM	#12
SAUTO Shit Join Date: Jun 2008 Casino cash: $10039067	Way too low on the list Posted via Mobile Device
Posts: 55,715

09-24-2014, 10:06 PM	#15
Direckshun __ Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Springpatch Casino cash: $2133447	whispers quietly as he lays his head to rest Joffrey. Tywin Lannister. The Mountain. SNR.
Posts: 59,688