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Old 08-21-2004, 09:09 PM   #1
bricks bricks is offline
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alright! I'll give this a shot. I'm probably gonna get laughed at anyway and critized, not that I care. Are you ready shark lovers? Probably a few of you r anxious enough to hear what I'm gonna say. Ok, anyway I'll get to the point, you wanna have sex with this one? I would be damn right honest about tha whole fucking thing! No fuck'n head games, none of this flirting b*llsh*t, no fucking pick-up lines. Just be yourself, fuck! Get the right timing on this one. Try and find a good setting with her first. Once you get the setting down pack, your all settled in with her, prime her up like you want her to feel horny about you. Once you mastered that, then just be honest, something simple like "hey, I'm very attracted to you. I can't help myself right now, I'm feeling very horny, are you? If she says yes. Well then, do you happen to be in the mood for some sexual intercourse? Cause I am". Don't ask her to fuck right off the bat it's one of the biggest mistakes and it's stupid. Unless, of course, she says so.
if she says she not feeling horny, then you'll have to catch her another day.

*BTW, if it works, great! If not, then who gives a fuck! Move on, get the next one, or go home alone, and yes jerking off is always an option.
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Old 08-21-2004, 10:16 PM   #2
Mr. Kotter Mr. Kotter is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bricks
alright! I'll give this a shot. I'm probably gonna get laughed at anyway and critized, not that I care. Are you ready shark lovers? Probably a few of you r anxious enough to hear what I'm gonna say. Ok, anyway I'll get to the point, you wanna have sex with this one? I would be damn right honest about tha whole fucking thing! No fuck'n head games, none of this flirting b*llsh*t, no fucking pick-up lines. Just be yourself, fuck! Get the right timing on this one. Try and find a good setting with her first. Once you get the setting down pack, your all settled in with her, prime her up like you want her to feel horny about you. Once you mastered that, then just be honest, something simple like "hey, I'm very attracted to you. I can't help myself right now, I'm feeling very horny, are you? If she says yes. Well then, do you happen to be in the mood for some sexual intercourse? Cause I am". Don't ask her to fuck right off the bat it's one of the biggest mistakes and it's stupid. Unless, of course, she says so.
if she says she not feeling horny, then you'll have to catch her another day.

*BTW, if it works, great! If not, then who gives a fuck! Move on, get the next one, or go home alone, and yes jerking off is always an option.
That's a lot of BS, for "You Wanna fuck?" If not, jerk off.
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Old 08-21-2004, 10:17 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bricks
I can't help myself right now, I'm feeling very horny, are you?
I really am, but I'm not really feeling you, dude. Thanks for asking nicely and not pawing all over my body, though. Maybe next weekend.

Hugs
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Old 08-21-2004, 11:32 PM   #4
Raiderhater Raiderhater is offline
Tried it on and it fit
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bricks
alright! I'll give this a shot. I'm probably gonna get laughed at anyway and critized, not that I care. Are you ready shark lovers? Probably a few of you r anxious enough to hear what I'm gonna say. Ok, anyway I'll get to the point, you wanna have sex with this one? I would be damn right honest about tha whole fucking thing! No fuck'n head games, none of this flirting b*llsh*t, no fucking pick-up lines. Just be yourself, fuck! Get the right timing on this one. Try and find a good setting with her first. Once you get the setting down pack, your all settled in with her, prime her up like you want her to feel horny about you. Once you mastered that, then just be honest, something simple like "hey, I'm very attracted to you. I can't help myself right now, I'm feeling very horny, are you? If she says yes. Well then, do you happen to be in the mood for some sexual intercourse? Cause I am". Don't ask her to fuck right off the bat it's one of the biggest mistakes and it's stupid. Unless, of course, she says so.
if she says she not feeling horny, then you'll have to catch her another day.

*BTW, if it works, great! If not, then who gives a fuck! Move on, get the next one, or go home alone, and yes jerking off is always an option.


And just remember Roy, gobricks here is the one who paid a whore $500 to screw his friend.....


And then his friend never paid him back.
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Old 08-22-2004, 03:41 AM   #5
Rausch Rausch is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by raiderhader
And just remember Roy, gobricks here is the one who paid a whore $500 to screw his friend.....


And then his friend never paid him back.


And if VaginaHader here is knocking a guys boot-knocking skills, he's got problems. Seriously.

If you want to make sex just try. If she truly cares about you the fact that you fumbe and bumble about with no clue will only endear her more to you. Just tackle the gal and let her know you're "going for the 2 pts bay-bah!"
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Old 08-22-2004, 03:48 AM   #6
tk13 tk13 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch


And if VaginaHader here is knocking a guys boot-knocking skills, he's got problems. Seriously.
Harsh.
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Old 08-22-2004, 09:38 AM   #7
Jenny Gump Jenny Gump is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bricks
Well then, do you happen to be in the mood for some sexual intercourse? Cause I am".

If not, then who gives a fuck! Move on, get the next one, or go home alone, and yes jerking off is always an option.
Ok, seriously, if some guy asked me if I was "in the mood for some sexual intercourse", no way would I let him sink the cream machine.

Bad advice.
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Old 08-22-2004, 09:41 AM   #8
suds79 suds79 is offline
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Man to bad I'm really late jumping into this one.

I don't know to many people who go "So, are you ready to have sex now?".... Other person - "Sure. Lets do this."

Just try to get to some heavy makin out slick and just let it happen.

You'll quickly find out how far it'll go.

You don't ask to make out do you?
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Old 08-22-2004, 09:43 AM   #9
Bowser Bowser is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyGump
Ok, seriously, if some guy asked me if I was "in the mood for some sexual intercourse", no way would I let him sink the cream machine.

Bad advice.
OK, seriously, if some girl asked me if I wanted to "sink the cream machine", no way would I sink said "machine".

Bad mojo.
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Old 08-22-2004, 09:44 AM   #10
Bowser Bowser is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bowser
OK, seriously, if some girl asked me if I wanted to "sink the cream machine", no way would I sink said "machine".

Bad mojo.
Allright, allright!! Who am I kidding? I'd be all over that!!!
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Old 08-22-2004, 10:02 AM   #11
Jenny Gump Jenny Gump is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bowser
Allright, allright!! Who am I kidding? I'd be all over that!!!
That's what I thought.
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Old 08-22-2004, 04:39 PM   #12
Over-Head Over-Head is offline
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Jenny, you know ANY man would be all over ya in a new york minute,,,but thats another story

Did our poster boy for virginity get laid this weekend or what?
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Old 08-22-2004, 09:54 PM   #13
Rausch Rausch is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyGump
Ok, seriously, if some guy asked me if I was "in the mood for some sexual intercourse", no way would I let him sink the cream machine.

Bad advice.
Yeah, just wink at 'er and ask "Would you like some EXTRA pepperoni with that pie mah'm?"

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Quote:
"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).
Quote:
Originally Posted by rico
I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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