Why do I do it to myself?

[Hootie]

I went to the movies last night...bought a large tub of popcorn...extra extra butter...lots of salt...(I was a little drunk) and proceeded to max out on the thing and eat 80% of it (way too much)...

Right now I am so uncomfortable...I can't move. This has happened before. One time in high school I had mono, and it was the worst month long feeling I've ever had.

I compare this feeling to what, at that time, felt like my deathbed. I can't quite describe it...my stomach feels awful...if I move I feel like I'm going to vomit...and all I can taste is that disgusting butter taste and it makes me think of that popcorn which in turn makes me want to vomit even more.

And then I look around at my apartment that apparently went through a mini tornado last night and my roommates dirty dishes which again, make me want to vomit and off myself.

I hate life right now.

[Hootie]

Originally Posted by Katipan

So I go to a party at Hooties house. Some funky smelling chick barfs on me and I need to take a shower. While showering I feel someone else's pee running down my legs?

I'd be more vengeful than Bloody Mary. There would be blood scattered throughout the room. Millions of shards of glass. And a missing toilet plunger.

First off, no one would pee on you...or invade your privacy. We're not tools or perverts, and none of us are aggressive or make women feel uncomfortable. I can promise you that. We're not creepy.

Secondly, I wouldn't shower in our shower. I cringe when I walk into our bathroom.

Third, while we often have people over after hours, I can't remember the last time we had anyone puke on themselves. It happened when we were 19...but, despite what I say about 15 year old girls, we usually hang out with girls of drinking age...and usually those girls can handle their liquor (especially if they are still going at 3 AM)...

['Hamas' Jenkins]

Crawling across the floor naked to draw attention to yourself satisfies 1, 2, 4, and 6 just by itself. Your other behavior on this board displays 3.

And "intimacy" doesn't just mean sexual intimacy or a dating relationship. Telling people you work with about water sports and tooth picks up the urethra? That's a pretty solid descriptor of 8.

[Hootie]

Originally Posted by keg in kc

There's your first mistake.

Everything after that's your own damned fault.

Are you kidding me?

I'll openly invite anyone to hang out with me when I'm in KC next...I guarantee you'll change your opinion of me.

I'm a fun person to drink with.

[stevieray]

were you neglected as a kid?

[Hootie]

Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins

Crawling across the floor naked to draw attention to yourself satisfies 1, 2, 4, and 6 just by itself. Your other behavior on this board displays 3.

And "intimacy" doesn't just mean sexual intimacy or a dating relationship. Telling people you work with about water sports and tooth picks up the urethra? That's a pretty solid descriptor of 8.

Well, I guess there are worse things...

If I'm choosing from disorders, I guess this one sounds ok to me.

[luv]

Originally Posted by Hootie

Are you kidding me?

I'll openly invite anyone to hang out with me when I'm in KC next...I guarantee you'll change your opinion of me.

I'm a fun person to drink with.

Isn't it amazing how much we can misrepresent ourselves on the internet?

[Katipan]

Originally Posted by luv

Isn't it amazing how much we can misrepresent ourselves on the internet?

It's amazing that people would even bother.
Hootie I think is exactly how he claims to be.

[keg in kc]

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm just as lovable in person as I am on here.

[Hootie]

Originally Posted by stevieray

were you neglected as a kid?

What suggests that I was neglected?

This makes no sense.

My friends and I have crazy stories that apparently don't fit the social norm. I'm ok with that.

However, I come from a totally normal and supportive family.

I understand a lot of you are considerably older and Steve always jokes and says things like..."god damn my dad would kill me if he saw this etc. etc. etc."

Don't act like we don't get it...it just doesn't bother me.

Dude Steve hates having pants on...we had these friends from U of I (both GENIUSES, smartest dudes ever, engineers, they never partied...we were poker buddies who played the shit out of Smash Bros. and had a basketball team at the rec)...these dudes would never get naked and I would never imagine being naked in front of them...Steve, however, decides in the middle of a poker game he's done with his pants and sits on a paper towel and plays poker the rest of the night with no pants on...naked.

These dudes find it hilarious...

If you realize the context in which we do things, I think you'd realize we are far from 'gay'...I swear to God...Steve is always far more open to this shit when we meet new people...I moved to Chicago and met a new guy who was my roommate (he was friends with the guy we knew who's house we moved into)...he thought steve and his nakedness was weird as shit...and eventually he realized the context and now the dude seriously considers us his best friends...

It just isn't gay or weird to us...and to anyone else who knows any of my friends personally.

I don't know how else I can describe it.

[Katipan]

I think it would be funny if someone took their pants off in the middle of a poker tournament.

Not so much with the funny once they start peeing on stuff and sticking toothpicks into pee holes. Then it's more of a raised eyebrow maybe I need to leave before the cops or paramedics arrive kind of thing.

[luv]

Originally Posted by Katipan

It's amazing that people would even bother.
Hootie I think is exactly how he claims to be.

I think it's easy for people to find their niche, or fall into one, and then continue to portray that personality (which may/may not be all inclusive of their actual personality). Hootie tells the drunken stories of him and his friends, he acts like he's a sports genius, etc. We form our opinions of him based solely on what he posts. Who knows? There could be a decent, normal, personable side to him, too.

[Hootie]

Originally Posted by luv

Isn't it amazing how much we can misrepresent ourselves on the internet?

I guarantee you that...

If this board put me and 'Hamas' together as roommates...and we had to hang out and blah blah blah and if we made it a year, we'd each get $1,000,000...

We'd be best ****ing friends at the end of the year.

Steve has always been the insta-likable one. When people meet Steve, they love him...he's super charismatic, and personable...a lot of people either like me or hate me at first (no in between), because I'm always face value...but everyone always ends up liking me and liking me more than Steve...I'm so laid back and easy to get along with it's scary.

I've lived with Steve and some other people for YEARS...and none of us have ever gotten into a fight. Never.

I feel bad for anyone who doesn't have 5 friends like I do...

Steve especially. It's hilarious that we know each other so well, that at any time any place when something happens, we know exactly what the other is thinking...

[Katipan]

Originally Posted by luv

I think it's easy for people to find their niche, or fall into one, and then continue to portray that personality (which may/may not be all inclusive of their actual personality). Hootie tells the drunken stories of him and his friends, he acts like he's a sports genius, etc. We form our opinions of him based solely on what he posts. Who knows? There could be a decent, normal personable side to him, too.

Of course there is. But it's hardly misrepresentation. He's still all the other stuff too.

[DeezNutz]

luv appears willing to plumb the depths of Hootie. Be careful, though. Those toothpicks are sharp.

[Bob Dole]

Originally Posted by Iowanian

I ran with some wild bastards over the years and none of the shit frootie is describing is either funny, normal, or heterosexual. You live in a roman bathhouse for morAns.

Hootie might not suck a dick, but Bob Dole would bet he'd hold one in his mouth until it went soft.