Life My ex had her baby last night... - Page 23

MTG#10 · 03-21-2010, 08:05 AM

I dont know why Im posting this thread, just need to vent. I know I shouldnt be feeling this way, its been almost a year since my wife left but I feel like I just missed the birth of my own child. I knew it was going to happen soon and I thought I was mentally prepared but when her dad called me and told me this morning I quickly realized I wasn't. I cant believe I still love her after everything she's done to me and put me through both emotionally and financially. I would take her back and help her raise her baby in a heartbeat. Thats how much I love her. ****ing pathetic I know. When's this shit going to end? Its been 10 months and it still hurts just as much as the day I found out. Its so hard to keep face in front of my kids, they are so excited to have a new baby sister and I have to pretend Im happy and excited for them but its killing me. I know I have to be strong for my kids and I will but when they are gone I dont know what to do.

Amnorix · 03-22-2010, 10:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

Ive been with 4 other girls since my wife left, didnt help at all. None of them were as good in bed as my wife and I could barely even get off with any of them. Most of the time I didnt.

Obviously I have issues but what about her? What kind of woman is ok with ****ing two guys that both care about her and hurting them both? What about him? He know's she's ****ing me and he still wont leave her. He gets mad and yells at her about it but she does it again and again and he still stays. **** it I dont need counseling, probably just more time. Im going to get drunk and watch some b-ball.

Sounds like she's a master manipulator who is good in bed. Great for her. Sucks to be you (or the other guy). Let her go manipulate someone else for a change.

I'm sorry but I'm done with this thread. You don't listen to good advice (get counseling) and watching this slow motion train wreck isn't fun. You need to get counseling because you are clearly emotional damaged -- and it has nothing to do with whether or not you can handle her having another guy's baby. You are a complete disaster. You NEED counseling. Right now in your life your priorities basically need to be air, water, food, counseling.

MTG#10 · 03-22-2010, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katipan

They just had a brand new baby sister and you are actively trying to break up your wife and her boyfriend. The daddy to their new sister. The guy they see kiss their mother. The guy thats around when they're around their mother.

You have zero clue how your little pebbles of hatred and despair effect anyone.
Not even yourself.

They dont care about their mom's new bf, my daughter wants us to get back together and my wife says my boys wont even talk to him.

Jilly · 03-22-2010, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

They dont care about their mom's new bf, my daughter wants us to get back together and my wife says my boys wont even talk to him.

Please please PLEASE get counseling. I can look into some sliding scale places if you can't afford it.

**DaFace** · 03-22-2010, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

They dont care about their mom's new bf, my daughter wants us to get back together and my wife says my boys wont even talk to him.

The fact that you think this means anything is indicative of the overall problem.

Amnorix · 03-22-2010, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

I just set up a free phone consultation with Tri-Lakes Relational Center here in Springfield. I dont know if Im going to be able to afford their services yet but I guess I'll find out when they call. I feel a lot better today, not as depressed as I have been. Maybe because the sun is out I dont know. Yesterday was just really bad because of the baby being born. I thought I was mentally prepared to handle it but I wasn't.

I skipped to the end of the thread. Great. Good to hear.

Here's a clue -- STOP seeing her when the kids aren't around. You should only see her to drop off / pick up. Presumably you can control your sexual urges then. Otherwise, forget it. DO NOT see her when the kids aren't around. The sex may be great physically, but it's destroying you emotionally and mentally, so STOP.

MTG#10 · 03-22-2010, 10:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaFace

The fact that you think this means anything is indicative of the overall problem.

I know my kids dont like him, and thats all I need to know. It even bothers my wife. He ignores them, they ignore him and my daughter has asked both me and my wife more than once if we would get back together.

Katipan · 03-22-2010, 10:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

They dont care about their mom's new bf, my daughter wants us to get back together and my wife says my boys wont even talk to him.

Of course your daughter wants you back together and your boys are raging. Thats what kids do and feel during a breakup. If they hated the guy like your oh so honest wife declares and you lap up like a puppy dog then they WOULDN'T be excited about a new baby. Regardless of how much they love their mom. But instead of finding a sort of relationship with their mother that is in the best interests of ALL the parties involved, you just want to **** because TIGER WOODS IS ADDICTED SO YOU ARE TOO.

I don't see how your hands are any less stained than all the whores involved. Thats fine. I've been wiping mine on shit for years. But I own it.

Hydrae · 03-22-2010, 10:55 AM

Your kids are probably not as clueless as you may think. Even at their young age they are more aware of things than we like to give them credit for.

My wife asked me to point out to you that this will have an affect on them in the long run. They learn how to deal with adulthood by watching the adults in their life. If you are not careful, they will find themselves perpetuating these issues in their own lives. For their sake, you need to find a way to end this for good.

I am very glad to see you have found a resource to get some help. If you ever need anything, let me know. I may not be in the area but at the very least I can be a shoulder to lean on if needed.

Brock · 03-22-2010, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

I know my kids dont like him, and thats all I need to know. It even bothers my wife. He ignores them, they ignore him and my daughter has asked both me and my wife more than once if we would get back together.

If you want to make your kids happy in the short term, go for it. Just be aware you'll be spending years in an atmosphere of poisonous resentment. Obviously, you're going to do what you're going to do though.

03-22-2010, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

Im not doing anything to my kids, for the third time they have no clue whats going on. My wife is doing it to me as well, and am I really supposed to feel bad for what this is doing to her boyfriend? The guy that has a fetish for married women? The guy that slept with two other married girls at my wife's work before her? **** him.

No, you aren't supposed to feel badly for him. Nor should you feel badly for your wife. But I'll bet your kids are about 20x more aware than you think. I am glad you're doing your best to shelter them from it. That's smart. But don't pretend they don't know something is wrong.

MOhillbilly · 03-22-2010, 11:10 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCyaXh-VZco

threebag · 03-22-2010, 11:11 AM

Mtg do what makes you happy just get on the same page with the other player (wife). Maybe she will go with you later in your counciling mention it to her if she takes the bait go for it if she gives you some song and dance work on an exit stratagy to accomidate for you and your family (kids). If she is that stoopid then all of you need space from her anyways

Mr. Plow · 03-22-2010, 11:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTG#10

Im not doing anything to my kids, for the third time they have no clue whats going on. My wife is doing it to me as well, and am I really supposed to feel bad for what this is doing to her boyfriend? The guy that has a fetish for married women? The guy that slept with two other married girls at my wife's work before her? **** him.

No, I don't expect you to care about what it does to him. Afterall, you feel like he broke up your marriage. In reality, your wife broke up your marriage and yet you seem to not want to hold her responsible for it. You said that you would STILL take her back which I find absolutely ridiculous, but that's me. Loving her is one thing. Accepting the reality that she really doesn't give two shits about you and moving on with your life is another.

But, in the end the situation has been reversed on you. You've become the boyfriend. You are breaking up a home. A home that now has a new baby in it. A new baby that your ex wife had with another man.

Whether or not you actually see what this is all doing to your kids is irrelevant, because it is. Will it show up in the next week....no. But somewhere down the road, you'll see it - and you will feel like an asshole for putting them through it. More than likely when they get into the serious relationship stage of life.

Like I said, you need some counseling. You need help. You need someone - anyone - who can see this from an outside perspective and say to you "What the **** are you doing? Move on with your life." I hope you find it because it sounds like you have 3 great kids that need you - whether they directly express that to you or not.

MOhillbilly · 03-22-2010, 11:17 AM

That place across the street from parkview is cheap. You wont get meds and shit but itll atleast get your foot in the door.

Groves · 03-22-2010, 11:25 AM

Too many officers here. Lots of good advice mixing with the bad. Get some help, there's plenty of offers here to find it.

If all that fails, I hear that pigs are good listeners. I know where you can get one sorta local, pretty cheap!

03-21-2010, 08:05 AM
MTG#10 Mammoth penis Join Date: May 2006 Location: Springfield Casino cash: $7014386	My ex had her baby last night... I dont know why Im posting this thread, just need to vent. I know I shouldnt be feeling this way, its been almost a year since my wife left but I feel like I just missed the birth of my own child. I knew it was going to happen soon and I thought I was mentally prepared but when her dad called me and told me this morning I quickly realized I wasn't. I cant believe I still love her after everything she's done to me and put me through both emotionally and financially. I would take her back and help her raise her baby in a heartbeat. Thats how much I love her. ****ing pathetic I know. When's this shit going to end? Its been 10 months and it still hurts just as much as the day I found out. Its so hard to keep face in front of my kids, they are so excited to have a new baby sister and I have to pretend Im happy and excited for them but its killing me. I know I have to be strong for my kids and I will but when they are gone I dont know what to do.
Posts: 11,437

03-22-2010, 10:55 AM	#338
Hydrae MVP Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Newport, Or Casino cash: $-1103000	Your kids are probably not as clueless as you may think. Even at their young age they are more aware of things than we like to give them credit for. My wife asked me to point out to you that this will have an affect on them in the long run. They learn how to deal with adulthood by watching the adults in their life. If you are not careful, they will find themselves perpetuating these issues in their own lives. For their sake, you need to find a way to end this for good. I am very glad to see you have found a resource to get some help. If you ever need anything, let me know. I may not be in the area but at the very least I can be a shoulder to lean on if needed. __________________ My 2024 Adopt-A-Chief: Rashee Rice
Posts: 14,855

03-22-2010, 11:10 AM	#341
MOhillbilly Mama Tried Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Missouri Casino cash: $9949903	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCyaXh-VZco __________________ True Son of Liberty
Posts: 23,371

03-22-2010, 11:11 AM	#342
threebag Snacks Are Under My Apron Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The Edge Casino cash: $-1022380	Mtg do what makes you happy just get on the same page with the other player (wife). Maybe she will go with you later in your counciling mention it to her if she takes the bait go for it if she gives you some song and dance work on an exit stratagy to accomidate for you and your family (kids). If she is that stoopid then all of you need space from her anyways
Posts: 26,230

03-22-2010, 11:17 AM	#344
MOhillbilly Mama Tried Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Missouri Casino cash: $9949903	That place across the street from parkview is cheap. You wont get meds and shit but itll atleast get your foot in the door. __________________ True Son of Liberty
Posts: 23,371

03-22-2010, 11:25 AM	#345
Groves Turning the Corner Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Springfield, Missouri Casino cash: $-851459	Too many officers here. Lots of good advice mixing with the bad. Get some help, there's plenty of offers here to find it. If all that fails, I hear that pigs are good listeners. I know where you can get one sorta local, pretty cheap!
Posts: 2,387