Life One of my colleagues from college married a former student of his - Page 2

**RealSNR** · 02:08 PM

I found this out via facebook.

I went to grad school with this guy. We were acquaintances, but never really friends. Ideal facebook friends, in other words.

He got a job teaching at a college. In his first year he would have taught her when she was a freshman. She's two years removed from being his student. He's 12 years older than her.

There's nothing immoral about this, but am I wrong in thinking this is just a taaaaad bit creepy?

I mean, if they were doing this the right/moral way, they wouldn't have had any romantic involvement with each other whatsoever two years ago. Meaning they had two years to decide they wanted to elevate the mentor/mentoree relationship to something intimate. Then they had to get engaged and married. All in two years. That's it. Two years.

Whatevs. They're happy, I guess. Just... oh who am I kidding. That's gross. That's ****ing gross. It's weird and disgusting and I don't like it. Blech.

EDIT: Not that this matters since the conversation is dying down now, but to be clear my issue with the relationship is NOT about age. She could go marry a 100-year old incontinent man. I don't give a shit. My issue is that there was very likely stuff going on between them while he was still her professor. No, it's not a big deal to me. It's just off-putting and sets off the alarm.

The next person who posts, "there's nothing wrong with that my dad was 34 years older than my mom..." gets a big fat **** you.

BWillie · 07-01-2012, 01:06 AM

Don't find anything wrong with it, hell, I saw grad student/TA's banging students in their discussions when I was in college. Not like it was a high school teacher and then a high school student, that would be creepy

**pr_capone** · 07-01-2012, 01:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

It seems very unlikely to me that these two wouldn't have been porking on the side when she was his student. In those two years she was doing her grad work (in the same field) at Texas-Austin while he was back teaching in Iowa. Meaning in order to foster a relationship in between breaks for the both of them, they must have decided to be romantically involved before then. Because part of those two years also involved planning out a wedding.

Okay, now I sound like the creep for being nosy in the details, but I'm not the only one from my graduating class who knew this guy who thinks this is a little funky. A few of my old friends even called me up to say "WTF?"

Lots of assumptions here. You don't know they were "porking". Also, your assumption that they had to have decided to become romantically involved before then is also a big assumption. You see, there are communication devices in place that let you correspond both via text and/or video over long distances. Technology is amazing meng... makes long distance relationships no so long distance.

I met my wife to be, dated, and married her all under a year and a half. Granted, it wasn't online but the point stands. There is nothing inappropriate about their relationship as long as he didn't fall in love with her while she was blowing him for an A.

**RealSNR** · 07-01-2012, 01:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DRU

So you get more pleasure out of that, too? Interesting hobby you've got there.

This little event has irrevocably changed my life. When biographers tell my life story, they will point to the time my acquaintance from grad school got married to a former student of his as the moment shit changed in my life.

I mean, I posted a thread on Chiefs Planet about it? Eegads! I am so distraught! Don't even try to counsel me! This means soooooo much! I mean, for ****'s sake, I posted a thread on CHIEFS PLANET about this! Ohh the huge manatee!!!!

Ultra Peanut · 07-01-2012, 01:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pr_capone

You said that is pretty gross... I'm sure people have felt the same way about you and your situation.

"Ignorant dumb****s may think a thing you did was gross, ergo you can never call anything gross ever." - Noted philosopher pr_capone

Quote:

Originally Posted by pr_capone

These two people care for one another and made a commitment to build a relationship. Why should they ignore how the feel because society tells them that its kind of icky?

They... shouldn't? =o

If they are happy, that rules. All I was saying is that it's a super awkward situation and it sucks to doubt the motivations of someone you otherwise like a lot. I'm not proposing that we adopt a legal age range for marriage or shun anyone in such a relationship.

**pr_capone** · 07-01-2012, 01:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ultra Peanut

"Ignorant dumb****s may think a thing you did was gross, ergo you can never call anything gross ever." - Noted philosopher pr_capone

They... shouldn't? =o

Damn, never mind. You get to be the only one that flaunts societal "norms" and damn what others think. You go... girl?

**RealSNR** · 07-01-2012, 01:13 AM

I used to eat my own boogers when I was 2. Can I call this gross?

Ultra Peanut · 07-01-2012, 01:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

This little event has irrevocably changed my life. When biographers tell my life story, they will point to the time my acquaintance from grad school got married to a former student of his as the moment shit changed in my life.

I mean, I posted a thread on Chiefs Planet about it? Eegads! I am so distraught! Don't even try to counsel me! This means soooooo much! I mean, for ****'s sake, I posted a thread on CHIEFS PLANET about this! Ohh the huge manatee!!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by pr_capone

Damn, never mind. You get to be the only one that flaunts societal "norms" and damn what others think. You go... girl?

eat my poop

**pr_capone** · 07-01-2012, 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

I used to eat my own boogers when I was 2. Can I call this gross?

Nah... booger eating is perfectly normal and some docs think it is even healthy.

http://www.damninteresting.com/you-c...ick-your-nose/

**RealSNR** · 07-01-2012, 01:21 AM

Anyway, as much as DRU is purporting this to mean I picketed their wedding Fred Phelps-style, that's not true at all. I appreciate people like Dave, Phobia, and pr_capone who are politely disagreeing with my interpretation. I just happen to still think it's a little bit sketchy. Whatever.

**pr_capone** · 07-01-2012, 01:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ultra Peanut

eat my poop

No thanks. If I am going to eat poop... I prefer it come from less angry and judgmental people who are looking for the slightest provocation. Not as bitter and typically nothing gets stuck in the teeth.

DRU · 07-01-2012, 01:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

This little event has irrevocably changed my life. When biographers tell my life story, they will point to the time my acquaintance from grad school got married to a former student of his as the moment shit changed in my life.

I mean, I posted a thread on Chiefs Planet about it? Eegads! I am so distraught! Don't even try to counsel me! This means soooooo much! I mean, for ****'s sake, I posted a thread on CHIEFS PLANET about this! Ohh the huge manatee!!!!

It's just interesting to me how so many people talk shit on so many other people. I hear it all the time in every day life. Get a group of people together and you hear a lot of shit talking about other people.

This is just the online equivalent of it. Like sitting in a room watching all the people, and turning to your buddy to talk shit on them when you don't even know anything about anything about them.

Why exactly are you or is what you're doing any better than anybody else? Why waste your time having that conversation as oppose to some positive conversation?

Ultra Peanut · 07-01-2012, 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pr_capone

No thanks. If I am going to eat poop... I prefer it come from less angry and judgmental people who are looking for the slightest provocation. Not as bitter and typically nothing gets stuck in the teeth.

gosh, why would i snidely respond to yet another in the endless stream of "ur a tranny" posts from the luminaries at Chiefs Planet Dot Com

like, i seriously edited my posts to be less seemingly-abrasive because i didn't want anyone to get the idea that i thought it was this HORRIBLE sinful no-good thing that is worse than anything ever, even before i saw your responses. but no. it is not enough to keep you from being patronizing and dense as all hell.

**RealSNR** · 07-01-2012, 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ultra Peanut

"Ignorant dumb****s may think a thing you did was gross, ergo you can never call anything gross ever." - Noted philosopher pr_capone

Pretty sure that was Spinoza, actually. Pr_capone's nothing but a big phony!

DRU · 07-01-2012, 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

Anyway, as much as DRU is purporting this to mean I picketed their wedding Fred Phelps-style, that's not true at all. I appreciate people like Dave, Phobia, and pr_capone who are politely disagreeing with my interpretation. I just happen to still think it's a little bit sketchy. Whatever.

I'm definitely giving you shit, but you're kind of doing it again. If you knew me at all you'd know that while I can definitely be sarcastic, I generally do it with a smile on my face and I'd gladly shake your hand and buy you beer if we ever met simply for being a Chiefs fan.

Don't jump to so many conclusions.

"It's...a jump to conclusions mat!"

**pr_capone** · 07-01-2012, 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

Anyway, as much as DRU is purporting this to mean I picketed their wedding Fred Phelps-style, that's not true at all. I appreciate people like Dave, Phobia, and pr_capone who are politely disagreeing with my interpretation. I just happen to still think it's a little bit sketchy. Whatever.

You know me... I'm nothing if not an argumentative trouble maker. Without knowing all the facts or even who they are, I would rather give them the benefit of the doubt seeing as how they are getting/got married as a result.

Typically I am a cynical person and everyone is out for themselves but I like to allow myself to believe that there are really people out there that truly care for one another and damn what society tells them. My wife is 7 years older than me and EVERYONE she knew tried to talk her out of it because of how it would look.

I'm glad she didn't listen. I hope your friend and his girl find the same kind of love from a similar circumstance.

07-01-2012, 12:11 AM
RealSNR Special Teams ACE!!! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Where the hell is SNR Casino cash: $-1304792	One of my colleagues from college married a former student of his I found this out via facebook. I went to grad school with this guy. We were acquaintances, but never really friends. Ideal facebook friends, in other words. He got a job teaching at a college. In his first year he would have taught her when she was a freshman. She's two years removed from being his student. He's 12 years older than her. There's nothing immoral about this, but am I wrong in thinking this is just a taaaaad bit creepy? I mean, if they were doing this the right/moral way, they wouldn't have had any romantic involvement with each other whatsoever two years ago. Meaning they had two years to decide they wanted to elevate the mentor/mentoree relationship to something intimate. Then they had to get engaged and married. All in two years. That's it. Two years. Whatevs. They're happy, I guess. Just... oh who am I kidding. That's gross. That's **ing gross. It's weird and disgusting and I don't like it. Blech. EDIT: Not that this matters since the conversation is dying down now, but to be clear my issue with the relationship is NOT about age. She could go marry a 100-year old incontinent man. I don't give a shit. My issue is that there was very likely stuff going on between them while he was still her professor. No, it's not a big deal to me. It's just off-putting and sets off the alarm. The next person who posts, "there's nothing wrong with that my dad was 34 years older than my mom..." gets a big fat ** you. Last edited by RealSNR; 07-01-2012 at 02:08 PM..
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07-01-2012, 01:06 AM	#16
BWillie Are you ready to Rumble? Join Date: Apr 2006 Casino cash: $-1238759	Don't find anything wrong with it, hell, I saw grad student/TA's banging students in their discussions when I was in college. Not like it was a high school teacher and then a high school student, that would be creepy
Posts: 52,415