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Old 08-22-2012, 09:34 AM  
Frankie Frankie is offline
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LOL,.. I went Clint Eastwood on someone's ass and paid for it!

The townhouse sits rather high on the edge of the drive shared by the rest of the neighborhood townhouses, making the approach to the garage somewhat steep and getting in and out of your vehicle rather difficult.

So, about a month ago, I had some buckets of paint in the back of my pick up truck as I had parked it in front of the garage overnight. Evidently while loading the paint buckets onto the truck some crack or puncture had developed at the bottom of one of the buckets and in the morning I discovered about a gallon's worth of white latex had oozed out and dripped onto the asphalt from the back of the truck (due to said steepness). I tried to hose it out of the asphalt, but by the time I had discovered it it was next to impossible to wash. I felt embarrassed but there was not much to do about it but to let nature eventually fade it out. Now the asphalt here is pretty ugly anyway with sloppy black patches and some oil drippings from cars all over it.

Fast forward to last Saturday. I drove to the townhouse and parked in front of the garage again. As I was getting out I heard somebody calling on me. I turned around and some 60ish dude, about my height and square jaw of perhaps an ex-marine officer (totally my judgement and comparison) walked up to me from a fair distance, put his hands on his sides and in the angry tone of an inquisiting warden, with his eyes fixed on the old paint stain, asked:

"WHAT IS THIS EYESORE?!"


Startled at his rude abruptness and consumed with the urge of not backing down, I looked him directly in the eyes and said,

"I didn't catch your name."

Ignoring what I said he went on, "I SAW THIS DRIPPING DOWN FROM YOUR TRUCK THE OTHER NIGHT!"

"And you didn't bother to knock on my door to tell me as it was happening." I said adding a bit of sarcasm, "You are a real caring citizen!"

"I DON't LIKE THIS," he declared still admiring his testosterone.

Increasingly agitated, I gave him a stare and said, "And you are the queen of WHERE?!"

At this point he backed out, angrily shaking, turned around and walked away.

Well, This morning someone has keyed the side of my pick up truck full length. Not once, but twice. Guess who's my #1 suspect.

(Footnote: I actually find this funny in its patheticness. My truck has already a lot of dents and scratches from all the building material and backyard brush that in the last few years it has carried.)

Just thought I'd share.
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Old 08-22-2012, 08:49 PM   #121
SAUTO SAUTO is offline
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Check your reps, bottom feeder, and heed the message. You will do well to do so.
Post the rep message donger
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Old 08-22-2012, 08:49 PM   #122
Frankie Frankie is offline
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Now back to your original programing.
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:16 PM   #123
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Check your reps, bottom feeder, and heed the message. You will do well to do so.

Oh shit....someone just went dirty harry.



If one is looking for the positive response to the line of jokes, it would have been a good place to insert a quip about installation of a wind turbine in the yard to provide power to a small city free of charge.
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:29 PM   #124
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It's true that I may have overreacted to a projecting pervert. Only one who actually lusts after and masturbates to his own mother can think of a question like that. To him it's a natural human behavior because he has grown up that way.

Now again, back to the show in progress.
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:34 PM   #125
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Yes, back to the show.

You were getting ready to tell us about how you made Michael J Fox physically tremble by your steely gaze?

Or is it about the time you beat Ken Jennings at a game of scrabble? no, no...it's the time you beat Michael Baden at a game of Operation, by Milton Bradley?
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:36 PM   #126
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Yes, back to the show.

You were getting ready to tell us about how you made Michael J Fox physically tremble by your steely gaze?

Or is it about the time you beat Ken Jennings at a game of scrabble? no, no...it's the time you beat Michael Baden at a game of Operation, by Milton Bradley?
Go to bed. This is grown up time.
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:41 PM   #127
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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I can see why you might be confused about my status as a student, but it would be more appropriate to call me a bus driver, since I just took your wrinkled ass to school.
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:42 PM   #128
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Go to bed. This is grown up time.
This whole supremecy thing you do when you get your ass kicked would be hillarious if it was being done for effect instead of being pathetic because you are serious.
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BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.BIG_DADDY has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:44 PM   #129
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Old 08-22-2012, 10:46 PM   #130
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Frankie once lifted Vern Troyer above his own head with both arms!
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Old 08-22-2012, 11:07 PM   #131
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Go to bed. This is grown up time.
Congrats on making your neighbor key your truck.
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Old 08-23-2012, 12:25 AM   #132
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a gallon covers four hundred square feet...if you punctured a paint can that could bleed out the whole gallon, that had to be a hell of a puncture or hole.

something's not right with this story.
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Old 08-23-2012, 01:06 AM   #133
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a gallon covers four hundred square feet...if you punctured a paint can that could bleed out the whole gallon, that had to be a hell of a puncture or hole.

something's not right with this story.
I'll bet he accidentally set off an IED and the paint was used to cover the blast area.
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Old 08-23-2012, 05:52 AM   #134
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Frankie, if you wish to engage me, I'd rather do it out here.

No, I will not retract my very simple question. I don't care if you are "serious," "sure that I will" or not.

If you don't want to answer, that's fine.
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Old 08-23-2012, 06:06 AM   #135
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