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Old 12-24-2012, 12:42 PM   #1
jd1020 jd1020 is offline
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Originally Posted by htismaqe View Post
Yeah, that what I meant by "we are hearing all of this 2nd hand".

Are you 14?
You seemed pretty confident when you said "She said considerably more than that" so I just figured you read them. My bad.
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Old 12-24-2012, 12:56 PM   #2
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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Originally Posted by jd1020 View Post
You seemed pretty confident when you said "She said considerably more than that" so I just figured you read them. My bad.
No problem.

It's the inherent issue with discussing these types of topics on a message board. We are getting ONE persons 2nd hand account of the actual story.
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Old 12-24-2012, 12:58 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by htismaqe View Post
No problem.

It's the inherent issue with discussing these types of topics on a message board. We are getting ONE persons 2nd hand account of the actual story.
Even this one sided story isn't that lopsided.

The quotes we have are a non-issue.

The whole snooping on your fiance, however...

OP clearly doesn't need to be in a relationship.
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Old 12-24-2012, 01:01 PM   #4
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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Originally Posted by jd1020 View Post
Even this one sided story isn't that lopsided.

The quotes we have are a non-issue.

The whole snooping on your fiance, however...

OP clearly doesn't need to be in a relationship.
Yeah, they are an issue. Successful marriages have a few basic building blocks, some of which are missing in the OP.
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Old 12-24-2012, 01:04 PM   #5
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Yeah, they are an issue. Successful marriages have a few basic building blocks, some of which are missing in the OP.
I guess I just don't see how someone putting a front on to be polite to your family even though they aren't thrilled with being there is an issue.
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Old 12-24-2012, 01:09 PM   #6
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I guess I just don't see how someone putting a front on to be polite to your family even though they aren't thrilled with being there is an issue.
Because it is duplicity......she can be honest with him and polite with the parents. That solves the trust issue and also could resolve any concerns about whether she is the right person to marry.
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Old 12-24-2012, 01:18 PM   #7
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Because it is duplicity......she can be honest with him and polite with the parents. That solves the trust issue and also could resolve any concerns about whether she is the right person to marry.
Nothing is going to solve this trust issue...

The OP admits to being "paranoid from past relationships" and "never seeing this side of her."

So he's really had no reason to snoop through her text messages and the only reason he did was because of someone he used to date that has no connection to this new girl what so ever.

Ya'll want to turn this into an issue on the girl because she doesn't like his mothers cooking but is still going to play nice and have Christmas with them, yet we wouldn't even know she didn't like his mothers cooking unless dipshit didn't snoop through her phone.

And there seems to be a popular belief that if he didn't snoop through her phone and find out these "horrible" truths that when they eventually came out it's going to be a trailer park brawl.
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Old 12-24-2012, 01:11 PM   #8
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I guess I just don't see how someone putting a front on to be polite to your family even though they aren't thrilled with being there is an issue.
Because she's being fake.

If she doesn't like his family, and he can't reconcile that, they're going to have a continuous stream of disagreements that stem from it.

Like someone else mentioned, it's one thing for her to "gut it up" for Christmas. What happens when Grandma wants to keep the kids?

Again, if the way she feels about his family is agreeable to him, even partially, then they don't really have a problem. They compromise and move on.

But if that we're the case, we wouldn't be here. She would have told HIM instead of her sister and her feelings wouldn't have come as a total shock.
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