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Old 03-12-2013, 10:21 PM  
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Alex Smith is a frog that won't sing or dance
There's this hilarious post on reddit that was made by a Bengals fan right after their playoff loss to the Houston Texans for the second consecutive year.

Quote:
"ANDY DALTON THROWS 47 TOUCHDOWNS IN HIS FIRST TWO YEARS, GOOD FOR 3RD ON THE ALL TIME LIST IN THAT NARROW CATEGORY BUT WHEN EVERYONE LOOKS, HE TURNS INTO THAT GODDAMN FROG IN THE HAT THAT WON'T SING OR DANCE!"
For people who don't know what the hell he's talking about:


And here's what happens when the guy tries to show the frog to a talent agent:



I mean, it's brilliant on a few levels. One is its connection to Andy Dalton as a TCU Horned Frog. The other is the portrayal of the hobo who discovers him, who knows that if he can make the frog sing and dance at any important event in front of any important talent agent, he'll have all the success and money he could dream of. The reality is very few coaches are able to make their Andy Daltons sing and dance like this, and very often it can be the very thing that gets them fired. At the end of this cartoon, the man puts the frog back in the box and buries him deep under ground, haunted by his explosions into song. Another guy digs up the box by accident, discovers the frog talent, and the process begins all over again. Another *****, another Cassel. Another Gailey, another Fitzpatrick.

And dare I say... another Reid another Alex Smith?

Look, you have Bengals fans that are getting sick of Dalton's shit. You have Texans fans getting sick of Schaub's shit. I have no idea if Falcons fans are sick of Ryan's shit, but it wouldn't surprise me if they were.

My point is I think Alex Smith is doomed. Because at his BEST, he's a singing and dancing frog that performs for the talent agents, but when he gets on stage for an audience, he turns into a ribbitting piece of crap. And you already have fans of these teams that HATE their singing and dancing frogs.

We haven't had a singing and dancing frog since Trent Green. We've been hobos for a long ****ing time. Cassel sang and danced once, but that was only because we were on acid. If we're lucky enough for Alex to be a singing and dancing frog, we're just going to want him replaced anyway.

Umm... actually I don't really have a point here. But there it is anyway.
Last edited by RealSNR; 03-12-2013 at 10:36 PM..
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Old 03-12-2013, 10:58 PM   #31
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This is in the top 3 of your best threads ever.
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Old 03-12-2013, 10:58 PM   #32
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Originally Posted by KC native View Post
THE FIESTA BOWL ISN'T THE GRANDDADDY OF THEM ALL. ANDY DALTON WAS ON ONE OF 5 NON-PAC12 OR BIG10 TEAMS TO WIN THE ROSE BOWL. **** THE FIESTA BOWL.
The rose bowl is a ****ing joke. Hence the badgers being in it this year. How many losses did the badgers have this year?5??

Thats the grand daddy of them all?
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Old 03-12-2013, 10:59 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by DJ's left nut View Post
If you think Dalton isn't in the bottom 1/3 of the league in arm strength, you don't watch him play much.

He is the AJ Green JUGS machine and little else. Without Green going up and stealing the floated, underthrown ducks that Dalton chucks up there, he'd have hideous numbers.
Gee, im not the only one who gets it.......

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Old 03-12-2013, 10:59 PM   #34
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Alex Smith's passes have the zest of Ben Steins voice.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:01 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by Demonpenz View Post
Alex Smith's passes have the zest of Ben Steins voice.
His arm is bigger than chase, or cassel, or quinns. And defintely bigger than ****ing andy i have no soul daltons....
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:01 PM   #36
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Originally Posted by RunKC View Post
Another thread bashing Alex Smith. Couldn't we just keep it to the 5 we already had?
Alex Smith needs more threads to bash him in.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:02 PM   #37
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Originally Posted by DJ's left nut View Post
If you think Dalton isn't in the bottom 1/3 of the league in arm strength, you don't watch him play much.

He is the AJ Green JUGS machine and little else. Without Green going up and stealing the floated, underthrown ducks that Dalton chucks up there, he'd have hideous numbers.
Actually have watched quite a bit of Dalton since the Chiefs have been so wonderful for the last couple of years. He was terrible this year compared to last. Not sure why he took such huge steps back but he didn't really play that well this year. He tried to do too much at times and not enough at others. I expect he will have a much better year this year as that kid is a competitor and will work to get better.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:02 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by KC Tattoo View Post
Alex Smith needs more threads to bash him in.
He does. Certainly. He should be booed from the get go because the chiefs brass decided he was worth trading for. Hes okay with it though. He will go out, play like a professional, and go home to his hot wife while bitchy little girls sit on a forum board pissed because they didnt get their way.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:03 PM   #39
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The rose bowl is a ****ing joke. Hence the badgers being in it this year. How many losses did the badgers have this year?5??

Thats the grand daddy of them all?
YOU ARE A ****ING MORMON SLURPING reerun. THE ROSE BOWL IS THE PINNACLE OF COLLEGE SPORTING ACHIEVEMENTS.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:03 PM   #40
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All these hate threads just make me hope Alex ends up successful here. I would literally enjoy seeing success in any measurable way at all. It would be wonderful really enjoyable on this board.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:03 PM   #41
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This is in the top 3 of your best threads ever.
This is the kind of shit that Hootie never looks at. He's always going on about me needing that "one" post that makes me a CP legend. Yet he shoots this kind of stuff down all the time.

The man doesn't know what's good for him, I tell ya!
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:04 PM   #42
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His arm is bigger than chase, or cassel, or quinns. And defintely bigger than ****ing andy i have no soul daltons....
So do you watch football or just read about it?
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:04 PM   #43
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Originally Posted by KC native View Post
Actually have watched quite a bit of Dalton since the Chiefs have been so wonderful for the last couple of years. He was terrible this year compared to last. Not sure why he took such huge steps back but he didn't really play that well this year. He tried to do too much at times and not enough at others. I expect he will have a much better year this year as that kid is a competitor and will work to get better.
What? Alex Smith doesnt work his ass off to get better? If you respect how Dalton plays even though he regressed in your opinion, I just think they got film on him and exposed him, and Alex Smith was playing his best in his career, whats your ****ing problem? Where is your optimism? You are sitting here sucking off a short, weak armed qb, at least alex smith is the proto typical size of a qb.

man up.....whats your deal?
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:06 PM   #44
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What? Alex Smith doesnt work his ass off to get better? If you respect how Dalton plays even though he regressed in your opinion, I just think they got film on him and exposed him, and Alex Smith was playing his best in his career, whats your ****ing problem? Where is your optimism? You are sitting here sucking off a short, weak armed qb, at least alex smith is the proto typical size of a qb.

man up.....whats your deal?
ALEX SMITH IS A MORMON. MORMONS HAVE NO SOULS.

Seriously though, I'd take Andy Dalton over Alex "I've been benched for other shitty QBs several times" Cassell all day every day.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:06 PM   #45
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**** Alex Smith.



Every ****ing clueless fan likes him because they feel sorry for him. They give their ****ing opinions based on emotions and not ****ing performance.
This is some of the funniest shit ever posted on this BB. We have a one of the highest rated NFL QBs of the last 2 seasons. We have a very QB friendly coach. Yet you cling to the the chaos earlier in AS's career and throw childish tantrums because the sweet Geno brand candy that you so wanted is put on a higher shelf.

I am not an Alex Smith fan. Not yet anyway. I do not feel sorry for him. He can buy and sell you and I 10 times over. I just feel hopeful based on the combination I mentioned. The least YOU can do is take a wait and see attitude. Unless you want to hold your breath and pout like a spoiled toddler until your face goes grey.
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