Alex Smith is a frog that won't sing or dance

[RealSNR]

There's this hilarious post on reddit that was made by a Bengals fan right after their playoff loss to the Houston Texans for the second consecutive year.

"ANDY DALTON THROWS 47 TOUCHDOWNS IN HIS FIRST TWO YEARS, GOOD FOR 3RD ON THE ALL TIME LIST IN THAT NARROW CATEGORY BUT WHEN EVERYONE LOOKS, HE TURNS INTO THAT GODDAMN FROG IN THE HAT THAT WON'T SING OR DANCE!"

For people who don't know what the hell he's talking about:


And here's what happens when the guy tries to show the frog to a talent agent:



I mean, it's brilliant on a few levels. One is its connection to Andy Dalton as a TCU Horned Frog. The other is the portrayal of the hobo who discovers him, who knows that if he can make the frog sing and dance at any important event in front of any important talent agent, he'll have all the success and money he could dream of. The reality is very few coaches are able to make their Andy Daltons sing and dance like this, and very often it can be the very thing that gets them fired. At the end of this cartoon, the man puts the frog back in the box and buries him deep under ground, haunted by his explosions into song. Another guy digs up the box by accident, discovers the frog talent, and the process begins all over again. Another *****, another Cassel. Another Gailey, another Fitzpatrick.

And dare I say... another Reid another Alex Smith?

Look, you have Bengals fans that are getting sick of Dalton's shit. You have Texans fans getting sick of Schaub's shit. I have no idea if Falcons fans are sick of Ryan's shit, but it wouldn't surprise me if they were.

My point is I think Alex Smith is doomed. Because at his BEST, he's a singing and dancing frog that performs for the talent agents, but when he gets on stage for an audience, he turns into a ribbitting piece of crap. And you already have fans of these teams that HATE their singing and dancing frogs.

We haven't had a singing and dancing frog since Trent Green. We've been hobos for a long ****ing time. Cassel sang and danced once, but that was only because we were on acid. If we're lucky enough for Alex to be a singing and dancing frog, we're just going to want him replaced anyway.

Umm... actually I don't really have a point here. But there it is anyway.

[Hammock Parties]

Originally Posted by notorious

[King_Chief_Fan]

Originally Posted by notorious

do you have a picutre of a frog sitting on a drivers side mirror

[FringeNC]

I'm not thrilled about the trade, but I am not as upset as many. A few quick questions for the board:

1) What numbers do you think Alex Smith will put up for 2013?
2) What numbers would Alex Smith need to put up for 2013 to make this a good trade?
3) What numbers do you think Reid/Dorsey are expecting from Alex Smith?

[Sorter]

Originally Posted by Go to Hell

That is awesome.

[HolyHat]

Originally Posted by Alex Smith Fan

Alex Smith on national TV, in a divisional game against the saints, not ONCE but twice scored in the last 4 minutes. Including one of the most clutch throws of all time.



To all the Alex Smith haters. Suck a dick.

Once out of 8 years. Not bad

[milkman]

Originally Posted by KC native

ANDY DALTON HAS THE SOULS OF TEN THOUSAND MEN IN HIS HEART.

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts

I'm not reading this thread because I'm so over this shit. However, this is a gem from the OP. I knew exactly what he was talking about when I read the thread header. Yep. I'm old.

I bet you were watching that cartoon at the same time that my legitimate children were.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Originally Posted by milkman

I bet you were watching that cartoon at the same time that my legitimate children were.

**** you, Dad. I'm legitimate too.

[milkman]

Alex Smith is an upgrade from Matt Cassel at QB.
That is beyond question.

That upgrade, however, is similar to upgrading from a broken digital clock that is right once a day, to a broken analog clock that is right twice a day.

[milkman]

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts

**** you, Dad. I'm legitimate too.

Sorry.

I was just referring to the children that aren't still standing by the mailbox, waiting for the suuport checks.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Originally Posted by milkman

Sorry.

I was just referring to the children that aren't still standing by the mailbox, waiting for the suuport checks.

If I'd just gotten one, I would've known you cared.

[candyman]

Originally Posted by SNR

We haven't had a singing and dancing frog since Trent Green.

I was with you until this comment. Trent Green wasn't a singing and dancing frog. Trent Green played great in that playoff game against The Peytons. Had it not been for our turnstile defense, Gonzo's BS offensive pass interference that wiped off a TD, and Priest's fumble we would have won that game. I dont count the 2nd playoff game against the Peytons under Herm, Trent's brain was already scrambled by then.

[Rausch]

Originally Posted by candyman

I dont count the 2nd playoff game against the Peytons under Herm, Trent's brain was already scrambled by then.

If we wouldn't have wasted an entire half running LJ for none yards and a cloud of dust we might have had a chance in that game as well...

[Frankie]

Originally Posted by cdcox

Nope. Bill Walsh's WCO made its debut in Cincinnati under a singing frog by the name of --- --------.

I wasn't sure about the origin. But I know that Walsh and Montana made it NFL vogue in SF, and that was my point.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

If we had just taken a chance and drafted a QB in 2013....that'll be the next one. Guaranteed. By ALL.
Posted via Mobile Device

[Deberg_1990]

Originally Posted by htismaqe

Who cares if he's actually GOOD.

He's better than Cassel, problem solved!

It appears the short term plan is to stablize the franchise. I t doesn't appear Clark/Dorsey/Reid was willing to take another chance on a slow rebuild again. Basically another 3 or 4 win season. Can't risk losing more of the fanbase.
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