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[Over-Head]

Ok,
speklling is gonna be shit here cuz well I’m half in the bag.
Why?
This is one of thoes threads, where, a guy really has NO WHERE else to turn, but hif he doesn’t let it out, he’s just gonna sit here getting
drunker,
more stoned,
and more depressed
The wife’s asleep,sick on medication for an infection.
sos’s the son. He’s out cold, and right now even though I love the boy, a 2 year old ain’t ehat I need.
I guess the only one I’m reasly hurting herte is me.

This may be just a message board who I get pissed at like everyone else does time to time.
But for a few of us, it’s like a "second life" so to speak where we know whats going on with certian ones bvy the way we interact.
Anyway.
Overr thte years it’s also become a place where by the "secrecy of internet hidden identity" we can vet and let our real life problems out to people we don’t have to look at or deal with in real life.
I started a few thereads a while ago (to those newr folks to catch you up to speed )

http://chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?p=5381468#post5381468

Well here’s a new twist
Dad’s got Prostate cancer. Check
Mom is in the final stages of lung/bone cancer. Check
Find out today, my brother
(who I dispise with a passion, and have been dreaming about what it would be like IF I could go meet him again at mom’s funeral and shit kick him for disrespecting my son when I went back home at x-mass time, knowing I can’t.)
was taken to the hospital Monday night with hart faliure.
He’s 4 years older than me.
I got the news about 4 hours ago, and have pritty much cried my eyes dry. I guerss I still love my brother too much to let him go. Even though I want to kill him as I was never able to stand up to the bully for my self. But refused to let ANYONE EVER do any harm great or small to my son.
Seeme’s ven after his hart stoped twice he still begged the nurses NOT to call his parents as mom who was dieing of cancer had spent lat week in hospital and probably coulnd’t take the news.
So if it’s not asking too much, could I ask a favore?
Could you say a prayer for a guy who’s about to lose 3/4 of his family in the next few mjonths
That I might just be able to get drunk, pas out, and wake up tomorow NOT seing this thread turn into a "Goatboy’s still a verigin let’s get him laid thread?
I can be an idiot at times.
But about the only other person in the world who could actualy make any scence to me about now is a woman I’ve only ever met once in my life for a job interview, who 10 years later has bcome a sister I never had and love with all my hart.
Theortugh a thelephone we have endured and shared both the hart ach of losing family to the birth of my son, is on vacation and unavaliable until nexct week.
If you’ve never experienced the feeling of being truly all alone with no one to talk to.
I can tell you right now through eyes so full of pain it makes typing hard
It ain’t ****en fun
I know gewtting drunk won’t help things one biut. AND DON"T F***EN LECTURE ME
But ya know what. Noting else went right today.
I’m probably gonna rambel a bit before I finally pas out please for give me in advance.
I’m kinda ****ed up right now.
And I really need some one, any one jyust to shoot the dshit with and let me vent before I
go out in the yard and start screaming at a tree

I've spent almost 9 years here, how about cutting a guy some slack.
For a while a few years of my life existed in the fact the Chiefs planet was the only family I had.
we've all had our ups and downs.
well folks, O-H is real ****en down ATM

[Halfcan]

Hang in there bud-Best wishes!!

[Hydrae]

Wow, that is rough OH. You may be a Raider fan but you have always been one of my favorite posters around here. I hope getting ****ed up last night and venting on here helped take some of the pressure off for you. Hang tough for your little one, he needs you and will for many years to come.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

I hope you're well, bro. I'm truly sorry to hear that you're dealing with so much.

[bevischief]

That is messed up. Sorry to hear, best wishes.

[FAX]

I actually read this last night (early morning), Mr. Over-Head, and have been thinking about it on-and-off ever since.

I'm reminded how, in my life, so many of the people I have known and loved have fallen away. As is the case with all of us, my family is growing smaller and many of my friends are now also gone. The essential thought I'm left with is how difficult it is to be a man in the face of all the grief and sadness. It's undeniable that, eventually and ultimately, we will all be alone - if only for a brief time. Our family and those upon whom we rely in our youth leave us with only ourselves to depend upon. Our friends and those with whom we learned to enjoy life and with whom we shared the best of times leave us to somehow find happiness within ourselves. The rock upon which we built our life erodes and, eventually, turns to dust.

And when that rock disappears, we're left to find the courage and substance within ourselves to transition from reliance and fellowship to another way of being that begins and ends within ourselves. Alone.

It is a very difficult thing to accept - and even harder to internalize. Can we stand in solitude and in that loneliness find joy? Can we become the man upon whom others rely and in whom others can find happiness? Can we be the rock upon which others can build?

I am very sorry for your difficulties, Mr. Over-Head. But I believe that you will find the strength not only to carry on, but to carry others. I urge you to look around and count the blessings you have, my friend.

Best,

FAX