Life Old People Thread - Page 25

kozzman555 · 10:12 PM

Hello old people of CP! Do you ever think about wanting to talk about problems you and other old people have? Is this football forum the only place on the internet you know how to get to? Well look no further! This old man thread is here for you to talk about your trials and tribulations.

Have an itch to complain about how the young generation doesn't know what hard work is? Post it in here! Are there some birds that need yelled or do you have neighbors that play music too loud? We'd love to hear about it! Did you fill your diapers and want to complain about the poor quality of Chinese products? Please regale us!

So if you can barely see letters in this thread without zooming in, but refuse to give up your drivers license, we'd love to read what you have to tell us! Come on in, bring your Werther's candy, and folksy tales of how things used to be!

Zebedee DuBois · 04-17-2023, 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kman34

I fart way more than I used to…

Your fart-count will drop in half once your hearing goes.

FlaChief58 · 04-17-2023, 08:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kman34

I fart way more than I used to…

It helps with propulsion. Think nitrous for geezers

seclark · 04-17-2023, 12:13 PM

I have barn swallows building a nest over the door where my mud room goes into my garage. Been sweeping the ****ing steps for 2 days before I looked up.
I hate myself.
sec

BEAVER · 04-17-2023, 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Maybe the brownouts are a portal to another realm, and you can only reach it by breaking through a sleep barrier in your brain. Sleep is an artificially introduced phenomenon by the aliens to keep your brain from traveling through the portal.

Is there probing involved?

**Shiver Me Timbers** · 04-17-2023, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zebedee DuBois

Your fart-count will drop in half once your hearing goes.

Great point

**srvy** · 04-17-2023, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark

I have barn swallows building a nest over the door where my mud room goes into my garage. Been sweeping the ****ing steps for 2 days before I looked up.
I hate myself.
sec

Attack dive bombing lil bastards.

ChiefsFan63 · 04-17-2023, 04:28 PM

I love my barn swallows. They are bug eating machines! Of course that is followed by cra**ing machines. Gotta take the bad with the good. I prefer no bugs out here in the country.

**Rain Man** · 04-17-2023, 05:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BEAVER

Is there probing involved?

Stay awake and find out.

**Rain Man** · 04-17-2023, 05:52 PM

I wonder how long we'll use the phrase "hang the phone up". 99 percent of the population does not actually "hang up" their phone, and I bet 50 percent have never done so. Will the phrase survive forever due to habit, or at some point will a more accurate phrase take over?

scho63 · 04-17-2023, 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kman34

I fart way more than I used to…

I'm a human gas machine.

scho63 · 04-17-2023, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stryker

I turn 60 June 5th.

I beat you by one day!

Geminis rock!

Stryker · 04-17-2023, 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dark Horse

Yeah it came out really small it’s supposed to be cheers. Nice list I would add Motörhead, Saxon, Armored Saint, Clutch, Black Label Society, Wasp, Rainbow, Montrose, Skidrow and Slayer

YES! Of course!

Stryker · 04-17-2023, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by scho63

I beat you by one day!

Geminis rock!

Of course they do!

You get 2 men in one!

Stryker · 04-17-2023, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dark Horse

Yeah it came out really small it’s supposed to be cheers. Nice list I would add Motörhead, Saxon, Armored Saint, Clutch, Black Label Society, Wasp, Rainbow, Montrose, Skidrow and Slayer

Yes, I love your choices! Count me in! LOVE the new Saxon - The Pilgrimage

scho63 · 04-17-2023, 07:21 PM

I did something this weekend for the first time in my life at close to 60 years old: I gave myself a complete haircut using one of those men's grooming kits.

I was nervous as hell thinking I was going to hack out a huge patch of hair somewhere in the back of my head in error. By using one of the plastic guide attachments I was able to control the depth and not **** it up. Even trimmed up my neck with just the razor part minus the attachment.

I had let my hair go wild and it was a long, stringy mess that made me look like a cross between a crazed Nick Nolte and Larry of the Three

.

When I was done, cleaned up all the hair and flushed it down the toilet, I jumped in the shower.

I was shocked how great it came out. Better than some haircuts I got in the past including a butchering I took one time at Supercuts.

I'm pretty sure only old people do this and then brag that they saved $30 bucks.

04-11-2023, 08:37 PM
kozzman555 Starter Join Date: Apr 2020 Location: Omaha Casino cash: $2530400	Old People Thread Hello old people of CP! Do you ever think about wanting to talk about problems you and other old people have? Is this football forum the only place on the internet you know how to get to? Well look no further! This old man thread is here for you to talk about your trials and tribulations. Have an itch to complain about how the young generation doesn't know what hard work is? Post it in here! Are there some birds that need yelled or do you have neighbors that play music too loud? We'd love to hear about it! Did you fill your diapers and want to complain about the poor quality of Chinese products? Please regale us! So if you can barely see letters in this thread without zooming in, but refuse to give up your drivers license, we'd love to read what you have to tell us! Come on in, bring your Werther's candy, and folksy tales of how things used to be! Last edited by kozzman555; 04-11-2023 at 10:12 PM..
Posts: 299

04-17-2023, 12:13 PM	#363
seclark MVP Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: nemo Casino cash: $1149900	I have barn swallows building a nest over the door where my mud room goes into my garage. Been sweeping the ****ing steps for 2 days before I looked up. I hate myself. sec __________________ "Mr. seclark. Wrong for gravy, wrong for jelly, wrong for biscuits." -rj "If every Planeteer who was disliked by another Planeteer stopped being a Planeteer we wouldn't have any Planeteers." -rj
Posts: 13,408

04-17-2023, 04:28 PM	#367
ChiefsFan63 Starter Join Date: May 2022 Location: Butler County Kansas Casino cash: $-4499500	I love my barn swallows. They are bug eating machines! Of course that is followed by cra**ing machines. Gotta take the bad with the good. I prefer no bugs out here in the country. __________________ Over 50 years of Chief fandom
Posts: 319	1 0

04-17-2023, 05:52 PM	#369
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $2778491 VARSITY	I wonder how long we'll use the phrase "hang the phone up". 99 percent of the population does not actually "hang up" their phone, and I bet 50 percent have never done so. Will the phrase survive forever due to habit, or at some point will a more accurate phrase take over? __________________ I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,864

04-17-2023, 07:21 PM	#375
scho63 Politically Incorrect Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Scottsdale, AZ Casino cash: $2231110	I did something this weekend for the first time in my life at close to 60 years old: I gave myself a complete haircut using one of those men's grooming kits. I was nervous as hell thinking I was going to hack out a huge patch of hair somewhere in the back of my head in error. By using one of the plastic guide attachments I was able to control the depth and not ** it up. Even trimmed up my neck with just the razor part minus the attachment. I had let my hair go wild and it was a long, stringy mess that made me look like a cross between a crazed Nick Nolte and Larry of the Three . When I was done, cleaned up all the hair and flushed it down the toilet, I jumped in the shower. I was shocked how great it came out. Better than some haircuts I got in the past including a butchering I took one time at Supercuts. I'm pretty sure only old people do this and then brag that they saved $30 bucks. __________________ "The only difference between sex for free and sex for money is that sex for free costs you a WHOLE LOT more!" ~Redd Foxx~** ~~2018 2019 2020 20212022 2023~~ 2024 Adopt a Chief - Clark Hunt and Brett Veach "The men who drafted Patrick Mahomes"
Posts: 51,025