Married members: Did you seek permission/blessing?

[okoye35chiefs]

my inlaws are off the boat Italians from the old country! I wasn't going to chance it.

Asked her dad and swear to God he said "if you ever hurt her I have Cement shoes in the basement, and guess what they are one size fits all." in his italian accent.

True story!

[eazyb81]

Of course I did.

You're a fcking pussy if you don't man up and show her father respect by asking for his blessing.

[okoye35chiefs]

i think today you can just send a facebook message to the parents...

[ptlyon]

Ok, so I'm reading a lot about showing the father respect.

But what about if the father has since passed? Would you feel the same as for the mother?

[eazyb81]

Originally Posted by ptlyon

Ok, so I'm reading a lot about showing the father respect.

But what about if the father has since passed? Would you feel the same as for the mother?

Ask the mother or oldest brother.

It is a sign of respect to her family.

[InChiefsHeaven]

Since I had to explain that I knocked her up, I think the marriage thing was a foregone conclusion. I never asked. You'd have to know my FIL...it would not and did not matter.

Having said that, I've explained to my son that he needs to do that, and I've explained to my daughter that I'd appreciate it some day if someone were to want to marry her to get our blessing.

Live and learn. I probably should have, but given the circumstances...well...shit, I was 19. Whattayagonnado?

[Jenson71]

Originally Posted by InChiefsHell

Since I had to explain that I knocked her up, I think the marriage thing was a foregone conclusion. I never asked. You'd have to know my FIL...it would not and did not matter.

Were you planning on marrying her before she became pregnant?

[InChiefsHeaven]

Originally Posted by Literature

Were you planning on marrying her before she became pregnant?

No. I was just graduated and she had a couple years to go. Basically after surviving getting her pregnant without her father killing me, I figured I'd see how things were going. We wound up moving in together first and so it naturally led to marriage.

I don't recommend that course of action, by the way. We were lucky and blessed. Most high school marriages over a baby wind up failing.

20 years and counting for us.

[bevischief]

My father inlaw predicted it long before I ask her.

[JBucc]

Yeah but I couldn't do it in person so I sent a quick text message instead. Gotta show respect.

[mlyonsd]

What if the father is a chief fan and thinks we should go OT with the first pick and give Castle another shot under a new coach?

[keg in kc]

Pretty sure I didn't.

Wouldn't now, either. Being nearly 40 myself.

Course I haven't dated anybody for 10 years. Not likely to be something I gotta worry about.

I did not. However, my first wife's father was estranged. I was with my current wife for 5 years before we were married so her father essentially told me it was time to marry her so we skipped right past the permission portion.

[DonkyPuncher]

Most women get married when they are adults, why would an adult have to ask the wife's parent's for permission??

On that note marriage is a dying tradition in itself

[Jenson71]

Originally Posted by DonkyPuncher

Most women get married when they are adults, why would an adult have to ask the wife's parent's for permission??

On that note marriage is a dying tradition in itself

That's a good point. The tradition legally stems from the Tort of Seduction. A father could sue in civil court the person who married/took away the daughter, because the daughter (and wife and minor-sons) were basically property.

Now it's morphed into a show of respect, but it doesn't seem that genuinely respectful or necessary to me.