Doin it like rabbits

[kstater]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080509/ap_on_re_us/18_kids

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. - It's a happy Mother's Day for an Arkansas woman — she's pregnant with her 18th child. Michelle Duggar, 41, is due on New Year's Day, and the latest addition will join seven sisters and 10 brothers. There are two sets of twins.
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"We've had three in January, three in December. Those two months are a busy time for us," she said, laughing.

The Duggars' oldest child, Josh, is 20, and the youngest, Jennifer, is nine months old.

The fast-growing family lives in Tontitown in northwest Arkansas in a 7,000-square-foot home. All the children — whose names start with the letter J — are home-schooled.

Duggar has been been pregnant for more than 11 years of her life, and the family is in the process of filming another series for Discovery Health.

The new show looks at life inside the Duggar home, where chores — or "jurisdictions" — are assigned to each child. One episode of the new show involves a "jurisdiction swap," where the boys do chores traditionally assigned to the girls, and vice versa, Duggar said.

"The girls swapped jurisdictions, changing tires, working in the garages, mowing the grass," she said. "The boys got to cook supper from start to finish, clean the bathrooms," among other chores.

Duggar said she's six weeks along and the pregnancy is going well. She and her husband, Jim Bob Duggar, said they'll keep having children as long as God wills it.

"The success in a family is first off, a love for God, and secondly, treating each other like you want to be treated," Jim Bob Duggar said. "Our goal is for each one of our children to be best friends, and everybody working together to serve each other makes that happen."

The other Duggar children, in between Joshua and Jennifer, are Jana, 18; John-David, 18; Jill, 16; Jessa, 15; Jinger, 14; Joseph, 13; Josiah, 11; Joy-Anna, 10; Jeremiah, 9; Jedidiah, 9; Jason, 7; James, 6; Justin, 5; Jackson, 3; and Johannah, 2.

___

On the Net:

Duggar family Web site: http://www.duggarfamily.com

[blueballs]

Originally Posted by RadeAM2

I tried this position once. It does not work.

give her some more lettuce
and try it again

[Delano]

Holy ****ing shit. Scourge of the Earth.

Wikipedia says he made his money selling and leasing real estate.

[Herzig]

One of my wife's friends dressed up like Michelle Duggar last Halloween...pretty funny!!!

[Sam Hall]

Report: Someone Totally Doing It Somewhere Right Now

CHICAGO—According to a groundbreaking new study published Monday in The Journal Of The American Statistical Association, somewhere on the planet someone is totally doing it at this very moment.

"Of the 6.7 billion inhabitants of Earth, approximately 3.5 billion have reached sexual maturity," said Dr. Jerome Carver, a mathematics professor at the University of Chicago and lead author of the study. "From a statistical perspective, it simply stands to reason that at least two of these inhabitants are totally going at it right now. Like, as we speak."

"But it's probably way more than that," Carver added. "Like at least a hundred."

The multidiscipline study, which tapped leading experts in several fields, including reproduction and population sciences, found overwhelming evidence that there is never even a second when someone is not doing it.

An analysis of the data, based on a new statistical model referred to as "Rauchembauer's Overlap," indicates that, given the sheer number of people in the world, by the time the first set of people is done doing it, someone else has already begun getting it on.

In addition, the findings suggest that there is a "good, to very good" chance that someone is doing it close by.

"The nearer you get to major metropolitan areas, the more likely you are to be in proximity to those making it," said California Institute of Technology probability theorist Howard Bergsson, who contributed to the report. "For example, we're in Chicago, a city of three million people. Someone is probably doing it right down the street, or maybe even somewhere in this building."

"And even if they're not, you have to keep in mind that it's nighttime in England right now," Bergsson added. "So someone is, in all likelihood, doing it over there."

While exciting in its own right, the new revelation has also lent credibility to several long-held theories, including the idea that those doing it are either partially or totally naked, and that the doing it itself may in large part involve a process known as "humping."

Citing the global population boom, Carver went on to demonstrate a strong correlation between rising birth rates and the new doing-it probability model.

"Roughly 350,000 babies are born every day," said Carver, who is currently working on a new report entitled "Making It: A Comprehensive Survey Of Sexy Stuff Happening All Over The Place." "And how does that happen? I'm telling you, people are just getting it on like crazy—just all the time."

"Think about it," Carver continued.

Carver said the most important aspect of the study is that it accounts for variables often overlooked in earlier inquiries, an error which may have resulted in a much lower estimation of the worldwide frequency of going at it.

"Other studies addressing this phenomenon made the faulty assumption that people only do it in bed," Carver said. "But people can do it anywhere. Sometimes even in the shower. Or the basement."

According to observers, the study's secondary findings are in some ways even more surprising: Given the fact that not everyone goes all the way all the time, the report predicts that there are at least four times as many people currently frenching or getting to second base than there are doing it.

"The number of people being felt up right now is astronomical," Carver said.

Though the evidence presented by the study appears to be irrefutable, it has already found its share of detractors within the scientific community.

"No way," said Dr. Lane Keilor, a professor of theoretical mathematics at the University of Rochester in New York. "Gross."

Courtesy of The Onion

[milkman]

So, what your telling us Sam, is that in the world where there are 3.5 billion people who have reached an age of sexual maturity, there is someone somewhere "doing it" .

Imagine that and think about it for a minute.

One other thing we do know is that among those 3.5 billion people who are doing it at some time or another, Goatse is never one of them.

[Herzig]

Originally Posted by milkman

So, what your telling us Sam, is that in the world where there are 3.5 billion people who have reached an age of sexual maturity, there is someone somewhere "doing it" .

Imagine that and think about it for a minute.

One other thing we do know is that among those 3.5 billion people who are doing it at some time or another, Goatse is never one of them.

[Bill S Preston]

All their kids' names begin with the letter J. It must be damn confusing remembering who is who. I wonder if they still have trouble finding someone to take out the trash?

[blueballs]

It's not difficult to pick out the gay one
or as Milkman would say the Goatse one

[RadeAM2]

She needs to have about 7 more. 18 isn't enough.

[Rausch]

Originally Posted by blueballs

It's not difficult to pick out the gay one
or as Milkman would say the Goatse one

The dad?...

I suspect artificial inspermination...

[Rausch]

I've always wondered about people with like 6+ kids.

Are they that good at it or that bad?...

[NewChief]

Originally Posted by Herzig

I live about 7 miles from Tontitown(Pronounced Tawny Town). It was started by a group of Italian Catholics...it really surprises me that the Duggars live there. I know the wife/Michelle grew up in Springdale(according to my coworkers)...so they must have located there after marrying Jim Bob. This area is not as country as some would make it out to be. Between Fayetteville, Springdale, Rogers, and Bentonville(which all border each other) there are over 300,000 people and some huge fortune 500 corporation headquarters...Walmart, Tyson, JB Hunt

Do they live in that house that you pass on the way to the landfill? I always thought that was Jim Holt's house, because it had a ton of Jim Holt signs out front and looked like some strange home schooling compound. The pictures of the Duggar's house looks like the house on the way to the landfill, though.

[Chief Pote]

Originally Posted by Nightfyre

Think he has to whack off into the cavity at this point?

that's sick.

[Morgus]

Somebody doesn't want China to win.

[dtebbe]

Originally Posted by Bill S Preston

All their kids' names begin with the letter J. It must be damn confusing remembering who is who. I wonder if they still have trouble finding someone to take out the trash?

My dad has 12 brothers and sisters, and my poor grandma has never been able to get them straight. Throw in about 50 grandkids now... and she's lucky to know her own name. She really is a saint. I can't begin to express how much I love, respect, and admire my granny

DT