Poop Bathroom tactics and farting in front of women you just started dating/seeing - Page 3

**2112** · 04-17-2011, 08:39 AM

I always had this fear of going over a girls house (when I first meet her) and blowing up the bathroom with a huge dump. or getting gas pains and having to fart to relieve them.

People of CP. tell me your horror stories in here.

Gracie Dean · 04-17-2011, 03:05 PM

Before the Crohn's I always went to the bathroom even if it was just to fart . Now, well Crohn's kind of changes things. My husband knows just by the smell how bad I am feeling and the closer to chemo day, the worse it gets. We invest in a LOT of candles and air freshener

Demonpenz · 04-17-2011, 03:22 PM

alpha males are proud of their poop

mikey23545 · 04-17-2011, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark

same here...actually, it's our most common conversation.

me: {fart!}
her: what'd you do...shit your pants?

sec

With mine it's usually something like "You realize that's not normal, right? You probably should get checked for cancer or something." Or, "I swear you must have the ass-end of some kind of animal. You can't be all human"

**bevischief** · 04-17-2011, 07:12 PM

I only fart when I am baking brownies.

threebag · 04-17-2011, 08:51 PM

The sooner the gas is passed. The closer you are to a blumpkin.

Mosbonian · 04-17-2011, 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by frazod

You know it's meant to be when you can fart and pull the covers over her head and she doesn't immediately pack her stuff and leave.

The ol' Dutch Oven...nothing like breaking them in right.

rtmike · 04-17-2011, 09:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by frazod

You know it's meant to be when you can fart and pull the covers over her head and she doesn't immediately pack her stuff and leave.

Quote:

Originally Posted by whoaskew

Or in the OP's case, that would means she's paraplegic LOL

Funny shit there, being a paraplegic & all.

rtmike · 04-17-2011, 09:29 PM

The wife & I had been dating for several months & we were laying on the couch. We had never passed gas in front of each other yet & she mentioned having gas & I said, "wow, so do I".

So I said how bout we fart together at the count of 3. I don't need to tell you what I did..or didn't do.

whoaskew · 04-18-2011, 12:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rtmike

Funny shit there, being a paraplegic & all.

Sorry about that. I wasn't thinking that one through.

04-18-2011, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rtmike

Funny shit there, being a paraplegic & all.

If we can't make fun of paraplegic or black folks, what's the point of jokes Mike?

If you can beat me in a footrace, I'll cut it out with the paraplegic jokes.

Otter · 04-18-2011, 12:28 AM

You know it's special when you're being spooned and let a big ripper fly at 2am, get slapped on the shoulder a couple times while hearing "ewwww, that was right on my leg" then go back to sleep like nothing happened.

She's a keeper.

booger · 04-18-2011, 03:10 AM

oldy but a goodie

does have fart noises otherwise it is SFW.

booger · 04-18-2011, 03:32 AM

this one always turns me on

Crush · 04-18-2011, 04:07 AM

It is all fun and games until someone sharts.

booger · 04-18-2011, 04:37 AM

speaking of sharts..........

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showt...t=tomato+shart

04-17-2011, 08:39 AM
2112 Reset Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Parts Unknown Casino cash: $8556765	Bathroom tactics and farting in front of women you just started dating/seeing I always had this fear of going over a girls house (when I first meet her) and blowing up the bathroom with a huge dump. or getting gas pains and having to fart to relieve them. People of CP. tell me your horror stories in here.
Posts: 22,057

04-17-2011, 03:05 PM	#31
Gracie Dean MVP Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $10004900	Before the Crohn's I always went to the bathroom even if it was just to fart . Now, well Crohn's kind of changes things. My husband knows just by the smell how bad I am feeling and the closer to chemo day, the worse it gets. We invest in a LOT of candles and air freshener
Posts: 12,955

04-17-2011, 03:22 PM	#32
Demonpenz I got Rice cookin in the micro Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Apartment "G UNIT!" Casino cash: $3102136	alpha males are proud of their poop __________________
Posts: 54,274

04-17-2011, 07:12 PM	#34
bevischief .... Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Somewhere Kansas Casino cash: $8659352 VARSITY	I only fart when I am baking brownies.
Posts: 27,731

04-17-2011, 08:51 PM	#35
threebag Snacks Are Under My Apron Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The Edge Casino cash: $3011660	The sooner the gas is passed. The closer you are to a blumpkin. __________________ Free DeBerg HayWire Greatest Mod Ever In big nasty kcnut we trust
Posts: 23,865

04-17-2011, 09:29 PM	#38
rtmike union paraplegic organizer Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: western Kansas Casino cash: $9094600	The wife & I had been dating for several months & we were laying on the couch. We had never passed gas in front of each other yet & she mentioned having gas & I said, "wow, so do I". So I said how bout we fart together at the count of 3. I don't need to tell you what I did..or didn't do.
Posts: 3,097

04-18-2011, 03:10 AM	#42
booger Don't Tug on Superman's Cape Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: clear out in the sticks Casino cash: $1488550	oldy but a goodie does have fart noises otherwise it is SFW. __________________ 2 Chronicles 7:14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
Posts: 12,500

04-18-2011, 03:32 AM	#43
booger Don't Tug on Superman's Cape Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: clear out in the sticks Casino cash: $1488550	this one always turns me on __________________ 2 Chronicles 7:14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
Posts: 12,500

04-18-2011, 04:07 AM	#44
Crush Amateur Poster Join Date: Mar 2004 Casino cash: $5237091	It is all fun and games until someone sharts.
Posts: 15,297

04-18-2011, 04:37 AM	#45
booger Don't Tug on Superman's Cape Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: clear out in the sticks Casino cash: $1488550	speaking of sharts.......... http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showt...t=tomato+shart __________________ 2 Chronicles 7:14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
Posts: 12,500