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02-24-2015, 12:38 AM | #2 |
"You like to drink?"
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Fibercon mother****er
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02-24-2015, 12:39 AM | #3 |
Banned
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AKA: The day after Chipotle.
Personally, I am always on guard for hard gas these days. My days of reckless farting are over. Had to ask my old man WTF with that. I thought he would have a heart attack he laughed so hard. Haven't talked to him in a few months since and he won't return my calls. |
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02-24-2015, 12:48 AM | #4 |
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Citrucel or Metamucil is what you need,
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02-24-2015, 12:54 AM | #5 | ||
Mindful Taoist German
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I don't have a problem $#itting.
I'm doing it too much. I'm spraying fire...
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02-24-2015, 12:55 AM | #6 | ||
Mindful Taoist German
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02-24-2015, 12:56 AM | #7 |
Arrowhead Trail of Tears
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: KansasCity
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Sometimes I eat a bunch of gummy fibers from Walgreens and attempt to silently gas out my household while trying to blame it on the dogs but eventually the stink it too powerful and the truth comes out... Along with more room clearing gas
Those are the best grocery shopping days, walk up in any section and drop a bomb like that then people scatter like roaches with the lights on. |
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02-24-2015, 01:07 AM | #8 |
Certified Bourbon taster
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Location: Shawnee KS
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Lower carb/hi protein diets can cause more gut-woe than need be as you jump in head first. You'll live better retaining some 'good carbs'. Try a bowl of low-sugar instant oats + a big TBL - or 2 - of chia seed, another spoon or 2 of oat bran and extra boiling water. Add some fresh or dried fruit, if you need it (chop up 1 or 2 dried apricots) Stir, wait 3 or 4 minutes, stir again and eat. Other types of oats may work better for you, this is how I handle the problem. That'll be 10-12 grams or so of fiber, a good start to your day.
Add a small avocado at some point during the day as a snack - split it, pit it, add some hot sauce/salt/pepper and eat it out of the skin w/a spoon. An addictive habit. Even small ones will have good fiber and good mono-oils. This time of year I buy these @ Aldi, 4 or 5 every few days and let them ripen in a brown paper bag. Aldi avocados are really small and cheap...just what you need. A big salad w/your greens + canned & rinsed chickpeas or red beans + mushrooms/onions/carrots will also help - add some canned fish if you like, good olive oil-packed tuna can make up half your 'oil' for vinegar & oil dressing. I make spicy-as-hell Indian style split pea soup all the time (dal) - a bag of peas, a big 64oz can of chicken broth in the crock pot over night or before I leave for work. Come home, chop up half a head of garlic, set it aside while you chop and saute a large yellow onion in some olive oil. Add cumin seeds, crushed red pepper and your garlic. Now a couple of TBL of curry powder -stir well and add it to your crockpot. Rinse the pan w/some box wine or water and add that to the pot. Add a rinsed can of garbanzo beans or other beans, a can of chopped green chile, a can of chopped tomatoes. Give it half an hour to warm up and enjoy. Since I eat this stuff often my guts are used to it. Lots of protein, lots of fiber. You can add your fish to your salads - I add sardines (not everyone likes 'em) but try some good canned yellowfin tuna in olive oil + red onions + canned/rinsed beans as a simple salad. That's good, hot or cold, add any leftovers to greens - or smush 'em up and use 'em in 'pita pockets'. Lower carb is hard on the bowels at first, but if you work your way that way using 'extra good carbs' from souces w/beau coup fiber you'll feel better. And so will everyone forced to stand near you. You may want to invest in a bottle of beano or a knockoff like 'beanzyme' for the first few months. After that your gut will be full of the right enzymes and your friends will stop pretending they don't know you.
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02-24-2015, 01:49 AM | #9 |
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02-24-2015, 01:52 AM | #10 |
I'll be back.
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Classic Rausch stylings wrapped up in a shit thread.
THIS IS CHIEFSPLANET I just drank some Metamucil because my turds have been rock hard lately. I'm not sure what it is because I stopped drinking milk.
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02-24-2015, 01:59 AM | #11 | |||
Mindful Taoist German
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Should have taken a day off the last two but they usually provide mass and "ease of use" for the colon. And by that I mean it also acts as a stool softener...
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02-24-2015, 02:18 AM | #12 |
Banned
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And women thing THEY have it hard.
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02-24-2015, 03:53 AM | #13 | ||
Mindful Taoist German
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Women things probably are hard.
Whatever they are...
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02-24-2015, 07:54 AM | #14 |
Gimme My Berries Back!
Join Date: Apr 2006
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That happened to my former MIL when she visited and ate our diet.
Your body's not used to it, something is wrong with it or it's not right for your body type. Usually, less carbs means less of this. I'd see a doctor or a good nutritionist. The doc just to make sure nothing is wrong with you but you'll probably just get a prescription. A nutritionist because they know diets more. You need someone to look at YOU. |
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02-24-2015, 07:55 AM | #15 | |
Gimme My Berries Back!
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Lots of Vit C will do it too. |
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