Social Etiquette: an interesting Facebook quandary.

[Direckshun]

So I'm in a bit of a quandary regarding my Facebook page. It's a minor issue, but it's kind of interesting, which makes it a decent offseason topic.

I've got a Facebook page. Yes, I know, lame, except that mine is very active. I update it every day or so with musings, pictures, music, and yes, political thoughts that scurry across my brain from time to time. Pretty standard stuff, I think, and my page has been updated on a near-daily basis for at least five years now. You're welcome to mock Facebooking and all that, but I enjoy it both as a way to keep up with friends and family and as a platform to express myself in whatever minor ways I can.

One of the things I've genuinely appreciated are my political updates. I'm decidedly, actively liberal, and I have friends across the political spectrum that will respectfully and pleasantly discuss the issues with one another. It's been this way for several years on my Facebook page, and it's one of those things in life I treasure -- you can't get pleasant political disagreement anywhere, but it's been right there for my enjoyment on my wall.

I know the standard feedback at this point would be (a.) don't Facebook, (b.) being liberal is dumb, (c.) why waste your time posting political shit on FB, or some combination of those pieces of advice. But that's not what I'm bringing up today.

Here's where the quandary kicks in.

I've gotten a new supervisor recently. I met him when he became my supervisor, so we have had no prior relationship. At work, he has the reputation of "likeable curmudgeon" -- much like milkman here on this forum. He's an older guy, always crotchety, he's always grumpy, but he's willing to stick up for you, and he generally means well. That's his reputation, anyway, but I do get this vibe when I work with him in person, but I've only known him under a month. There's always "kids these days" bullshit coming out of his mouth, but he otherwise seems a nice enough guy.

Within a week or so of working directly with him, he sends me a friend request on FB. I'm generally protective of my identity on the Planet, but if you know me enough to find me on FB, I've got nothing to hide, so I accept.

Within the day, he starts leaving comments on every single one of my political statuses. Which, in and of itself, I wouldn't mind.

But his comments are arch-conservative trolling. I don't care about the conservativism, as I'm FB friends with ChiefsPlanet's own patteeu and we've sparred on my wall several times. But pat doesn't screw with the generously cordial atmosphere I've accrued with my political discussions on FB. This guy doesn't give two shits, matter of fact he is intentionally abrasive with his comments. And he is hyperactive with his comments -- it's not a hit-and-run. He semi-floods the discussions with these remarks.

On a recent discussion about the immigration crisis we're going through with the 50,000 kids right now in camps at the border, he says he doesn't give two shits about kids that are breaking the law, and """zings""" that "what I want to know is how they train those flies in the UNICEF commercials."

Yeah. That's the kind of genius we're talking about here. And it trolls my other friends who are attempting to have an earnest conversation, and they get progressively more pissed off, and the conversation is shot.

Listen, I don't mind that he and I disagree on the issues. I live in the Ozarks and roughly half my friends do, but I manage to have reasonable discussions with them. This guy is being really abrasive, and it's weird because I work under him, so it's a delicate situation to begin with on my personal FB page.

Let me know how you'd handle the issue. It's obviously not a huge deal, but it is an awkward situation and I'm stewing on how best to resolve it.

Keep in mind that any advice that involves time travel ("you clearly shouldn't have friended him") is not terribly useful, as I lack that power at this point in time.

Thoughts?

[WhiteWhale]

So you're one of those people who posts multiple times per day and often hammers 'friends' with political propaganda ad nasuem?

Gratz dude. You are THE most annoying type of person on facebook.

As for a solution to your problem: I know this is a strange idea... but did you try asking him to stop?

[Garcia Bronco]

Stop the political stuff for awhile and then remove him or religate him to another group that can only see certain things.

[Bowser]

You should PM Bob Dole for top shelf advice.

[Fish]

You don't need any social justification for defriending someone, no matter who they are. Are you afraid of some kind of backlash at work over your conduct on a personal Facebook page?

[mr. tegu]

Tell him you are concerned about his posting habits while he is supposed to be working.

[Mennonite]

Never talk about sex, politics or religion in public. Trust me on this. I learned that lesson the hard way. You tell a few people about the dream you had last night about ****ing Hillary Clinton on a stack of Bibles one time and they will never let you teach Sunday school again.

Bunch of holier than thou brats.

[cmh6476]

so how do they train those flies?

[Mennonite]

Originally Posted by cmh6476

so how do they train those flies?

They don't. They're all computer generated. 50% of every dollar donated goes to George Lucas and ILM just to make those flies. The other half is spent researching new ways for Lucas to rape your childhood. Still a worthier charity than the Ronald McDonald House. Just how big of a house does that clown need?

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Dunerdr

Work? I thought you were a democrat.

[AustinChief]

Originally Posted by DaFace

Ideally, you wouldn't have accepted his request in the first place. I generally try and keep work people off of my Facebook friends list unless I generally consider them to be friends outside of work.

That said, I'd think you have two options:

1. Hide your posts from him. You can either hide him specifically, or you can create a group for people who you don't really want to interact with and add him to it.
2. Remove him as a friend. This would probably be tricky since you just added him, but I'd just let him know (in person) that you try and keep your Facebook account private and that you'd prefer to keep it that way.

Chances are you could go with #1 for a while, then quietly delete him in six months without his even noticing.

I would go with a variation of #1

Create a group that is everyone except him then when you post a political topic just click the dropdown that changes it from being viewable by PUBLIC/FRIENDS/ETC to [Custom Group]

[Bob Dole]

Who in the hell accepts a friend request from Simons higher up the food chain at work? That's just asking for trouble.

[DaFace]

Originally Posted by AustinChief

I would go with a variation of #1

Create a group that is everyone except him then when you post a political topic just click the dropdown that changes it from being viewable by PUBLIC/FRIENDS/ETC to [Custom Group]

You can do the opposite too. Just make it so that it's visible to friends EXCEPT the annoying boss guy group.

[AustinChief]

Originally Posted by DaFace

You can do the opposite too. Just make it so that it's visible to friends EXCEPT the annoying boss guy group.

Yup but that requires an entire extra click and TYPING! TYPING FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!!!

[Hammock Parties]

Just place him on facebook ignore. Out of sight, out of mind.

[BucEyedPea]

Originally Posted by mr. tegu

Tell him you are concerned about his posting habits while he is supposed to be working.

That'd be too uppity and perceived like mutiny telling the boss to get back to work. Geesh!