Tell your entertaining football stories here. - Page 2

**Rain Man** · 10-18-2006, 02:38 PM

Whether it's organized football, junior high football, or sandlot football, you can tell it here if it's worth telling.

I'll start.

Back when I wasn't decrepit, we used to play pickup football on our high school football field, and it was quite popular. We always had at least five on five, and there were occasional days when we had 11 on 11 or even more. We'd let anybody play who wanted in, so you'd occasionally get street toughs playing and stuff, but hey, it was football and so everyone got along.

A couple of times these two guys showed up, and one of them wanted to be the quarterback. He had a good arm, so his team let him be quarterback. I was on the other team.

After a few series, it became patently apparent that he was NEVER going to throw to anyone except his friend. Once we noticed this, we started double-teaming his friend, and he'd still throw to him. Then we actually started playing combo man-zones where we ignored every receiver on the field, and had his friend double-teamed with zones that rotated toward him. There was no way this guy was ever going to catch anything, but the QB kept throwing it to him and going three and out. It was quite amusing for my team, and the other team finally got so mad at him that they demoted him, and he and his friend left.

They came back one other time, and the team let him play QB again, but only on the stipulation that he not throw it to his buddy every time. I was on the other team again, and we immediately knew the plan wasn't going to work, so we went back to the double-team with double-zone approach, and this QB would throw into the teeth of it every time. It was hilarious. Finally we did something like trade his player for one of ours, and after that he was an okay player.

**Rain Man** · 10-18-2006, 03:32 PM

We were playing football one time in a pickup game, and this guy came and wanted to play. He was a giant. He was something like 6-8 and had to weigh 280 or more. We were all in high school, and the biggest of us didn't touch 200. We let him play, but had a rule that he couldn't be a running back. He agreed. It turned out that he was so slow that he wasn't a factor in the game at all.

SLAG · 10-18-2006, 03:35 PM

Jr High-

I played O- RG and on D- NT

while on D vs our heated rivials California Trail I noticed that when their Left Guard was in front of me they rant to the other side and then when the right guard was in front of me they went to my side-

I blew them up for 5 Sacks In one game!

Hammock Parties · 10-18-2006, 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by siberian khatru

It's like the future ghost of Barry Sanders entered my body for that one moment.

That happened to me once playing flag football with a bunch of Jemimah's Witnesses. I caught a short dumpoff pass, and juked three guys like I was possessed. Everyone was amazed.

I had a clear run to the endzone and I took off running down the sideline. Evidently the ghost of Steve Bono entered my body at that point because I didn't make it. I was so slow a defender came running up and started running BACKWARDS in front of me before taking my flag.

CoMoChief · 10-18-2006, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoChiefs

I was always the teacher's pet throughout my formative years. What can I say? It comes with the Jemimah's Witness territory.

You sound as if you were the class vagina.

**Rain Man** · 10-18-2006, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoMoChief

You sound as if you were the class vagina.

Ooh. Does this mean that the teacher was a lesbian?

siberian khatru · 10-18-2006, 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DMAC

The real reason I quit was the pot.

Didn't stop Randy Moss or Warren Sapp.

Hammock Parties · 10-18-2006, 03:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoMoChief

You sound as if you were the class vagina.

Pretty much.

stevieray · 10-18-2006, 03:56 PM

sixth grade ..ran a punt back eighty some yards only to ge tackled at the two yard line...becasue I turned around... just in time to see Jimmy Naudet catching up to me. QB was the coaches son, so the third QB sneak finally scored the TD. I was pissed.

My aunt came down from Omaha to watch the game, so that was cool.

**Rain Man** · 10-18-2006, 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevieray

sixth grade ..ran a punt back eighty some yards only to ge tackled at the two yard line...becasue I turned around... just in time to see Jimmy Naudet catching up to me. QB was the coaches son, so the third QB sneak finally scored the TD. I was pissed.

My aunt came down from Omaha to watch the game, so that was cool.

You should've just looked up at the Jumbotron.

plbrdude · 10-18-2006, 04:01 PM

Quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally Posted by CoMoChief
You sound as if you were the class vagina.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoChiefs

Pretty much.

admitting it is always the first step. good job.

**CosmicPal** · 10-18-2006, 04:08 PM

My freshman year at Pittsburgh State, I was playing pick-up football with the guys in front of the dorms. We had a game nearly every afternoon before heading into the dining hall for some grub later on.

Anyways, we've been playing for an hour or more and we were getting ready to quit when I suggested we run a fake punt. The game was tied and my teammates didn't really care if we won or not, but it was obvious the other team wanted to win badly, so I figured we'd "punt" it to the other team. None of them believed it would work when I said just let everyone through to block it. So, they did. Everyone came running through to block the punt and I faked the kick right at the perfect moment. Ran nearly untouched for twenty yards before the only person to beat was the punt returner- pulled a move on him and ran into the endzone.

Nothing that anyone hasn't done before. But, the coolest thing was when we were all walking to the dining hall, some guy came up to me and asked to speak to me. He was one of the coaches for the university football team. He said he liked what he saw in me and asked if I would try out for Pittsburgh State as a walk-on. I said, "No thanks" and went to go eat.

siberian khatru · 10-18-2006, 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CosmicPal

But, the coolest thing was when we were all walking to the dining hall, some guy came up to me and asked to speak to me. He was one of the coaches for the university football team. He said he liked what he saw in me and asked if I would try out for Pittsburgh State as a walk-on. I said, "No thanks" and went to go eat.

Folks, he left out the rest of the story:

"But the coach followed me into the dining hall and kept trying to recruit me. Walk-on punters in Division II are demi-gods, he said. Tons of bling and pussy. I'd get smart kids to take my tests for me, I wouldn't have to pay for a meal in Pittsburg ... Finally, I said yes, and became the star punter for the Gorillas and, later, the Buffalo Bills.

I am Brian Moorman."

Hammock Parties · 10-18-2006, 04:25 PM

I can't believe you turned him down. Obviously the Chiefs would have drafted you and you would have led us to the Super Bowl.

Hootie · 10-18-2006, 04:32 PM

I was always a flag football stud. In my high school, most athletes opted out of PE, but I didn't. It was my favorite time of the day. Well I was a little dick and I liked to show up all of the stoners when they actually tried playing sports in PE, so my PE teacher (who was also my basketball coach) never let me play and gave me a C for the friggin' course. How do you get a C in PE?! Needless to say I only started three varsity games my senior year in basketball and only averaged about 17 minutes per contest. I hate that guy.

Hootie · 10-18-2006, 04:34 PM

I was lucky to go to a small high school. The talent pool is really thin. You look really good when you're really nothing more than average. My only above average sports was baseball.

10-18-2006, 02:38 PM
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3198491 VARSITY	Tell your entertaining football stories here. Whether it's organized football, junior high football, or sandlot football, you can tell it here if it's worth telling. I'll start. Back when I wasn't decrepit, we used to play pickup football on our high school football field, and it was quite popular. We always had at least five on five, and there were occasional days when we had 11 on 11 or even more. We'd let anybody play who wanted in, so you'd occasionally get street toughs playing and stuff, but hey, it was football and so everyone got along. A couple of times these two guys showed up, and one of them wanted to be the quarterback. He had a good arm, so his team let him be quarterback. I was on the other team. After a few series, it became patently apparent that he was NEVER going to throw to anyone except his friend. Once we noticed this, we started double-teaming his friend, and he'd still throw to him. Then we actually started playing combo man-zones where we ignored every receiver on the field, and had his friend double-teamed with zones that rotated toward him. There was no way this guy was ever going to catch anything, but the QB kept throwing it to him and going three and out. It was quite amusing for my team, and the other team finally got so mad at him that they demoted him, and he and his friend left. They came back one other time, and the team let him play QB again, but only on the stipulation that he not throw it to his buddy every time. I was on the other team again, and we immediately knew the plan wasn't going to work, so we went back to the double-team with double-zone approach, and this QB would throw into the teeth of it every time. It was hilarious. Finally we did something like trade his player for one of ours, and after that he was an okay player.
Posts: 141,560

10-18-2006, 03:32 PM	#16
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3198491 VARSITY	We were playing football one time in a pickup game, and this guy came and wanted to play. He was a giant. He was something like 6-8 and had to weigh 280 or more. We were all in high school, and the biggest of us didn't touch 200. We let him play, but had a rule that he couldn't be a running back. He agreed. It turned out that he was so slow that he wasn't a factor in the game at all. __________________ I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit. Last edited by Rain Man; 10-18-2006 at 03:38 PM..
Posts: 141,560

10-18-2006, 03:35 PM	#17
SLAG Superbowl MVP Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: OOOOOOOOOOOOOLATHE Casino cash: $9910252	Jr High- I played O- RG and on D- NT while on D vs our heated rivials California Trail I noticed that when their Left Guard was in front of me they rant to the other side and then when the right guard was in front of me they went to my side- I blew them up for 5 Sacks In one game! __________________ Ad astra per aspera
Posts: 11,177

10-18-2006, 03:56 PM	#23
stevieray best in the biz Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Under Pressure Casino cash: $2465273	sixth grade ..ran a punt back eighty some yards only to ge tackled at the two yard line...becasue I turned around... just in time to see Jimmy Naudet catching up to me. QB was the coaches son, so the third QB sneak finally scored the TD. I was pissed. My aunt came down from Omaha to watch the game, so that was cool.
Posts: 71,259

10-18-2006, 04:08 PM	#26
CosmicPal Learn it. Know it. Live it. Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: St. Petersburg, FL Casino cash: $10004900	My freshman year at Pittsburgh State, I was playing pick-up football with the guys in front of the dorms. We had a game nearly every afternoon before heading into the dining hall for some grub later on. Anyways, we've been playing for an hour or more and we were getting ready to quit when I suggested we run a fake punt. The game was tied and my teammates didn't really care if we won or not, but it was obvious the other team wanted to win badly, so I figured we'd "punt" it to the other team. None of them believed it would work when I said just let everyone through to block it. So, they did. Everyone came running through to block the punt and I faked the kick right at the perfect moment. Ran nearly untouched for twenty yards before the only person to beat was the punt returner- pulled a move on him and ran into the endzone. Nothing that anyone hasn't done before. But, the coolest thing was when we were all walking to the dining hall, some guy came up to me and asked to speak to me. He was one of the coaches for the university football team. He said he liked what he saw in me and asked if I would try out for Pittsburgh State as a walk-on. I said, "No thanks" and went to go eat. __________________ - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - Four blessings upon my fellow planeteers: Older whiskey, younger women, faster horses, and more money.
Posts: 10,840

10-18-2006, 04:25 PM	#28
Hammock Parties I'll be back. Join Date: Nov 2002 Casino cash: $4590478	I can't believe you turned him down. Obviously the Chiefs would have drafted you and you would have led us to the Super Bowl. __________________ Chiefs game films
Posts: 278,303

10-18-2006, 04:32 PM	#29
Hootie Banned Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Dallas, Texas Casino cash: $10004900	I was always a flag football stud. In my high school, most athletes opted out of PE, but I didn't. It was my favorite time of the day. Well I was a little dick and I liked to show up all of the stoners when they actually tried playing sports in PE, so my PE teacher (who was also my basketball coach) never let me play and gave me a C for the friggin' course. How do you get a C in PE?! Needless to say I only started three varsity games my senior year in basketball and only averaged about 17 minutes per contest. I hate that guy.
Posts: 56,356

10-18-2006, 04:34 PM	#30
Hootie Banned Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Dallas, Texas Casino cash: $10004900	I was lucky to go to a small high school. The talent pool is really thin. You look really good when you're really nothing more than average. My only above average sports was baseball.
Posts: 56,356