Catricide

[Zebedee DuBois]

I want to commit catracide.

We have a cat that thinks outside the box too often. I don't think this animal has any redeeming characteristics. It is afraid of the outdoors. It is afraid of mice. It might beat up on a cricket. It considers the litter box as just one of many options. It needs to die.

Of course, there are other family members that seem to think the cat is cute.

Thus, I need to find a way to dispatch the cat and yet have it look like natural causes, or at least like I didn't have anything to do with it's demise. That means the corpse can't be mutilated or wet...and I can't have any incriminating scratch marks. If I could do the deed, and then leave the body on the stairs or somewhere for someone else to discover....that should dispell suspicions.

I've thought of putting her in a cooler and displacing the air with nitrogen or some other gas.

Any ideas?


For those of you that have tender feelings for felines, pretend I said "Bronco lover".


Any ideas?

[Lzen]

You don't need to kill the animal. He just needs a little behavior adjustment. Here's a device that should do the trick.

[Taco John]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Desk drawers. Is that close enough?

That's pretty good, but not as effective as a hamper...

[Iowanian]

Originally Posted by gblowfish

Thanks for the neg rep, Mr. Kavorkian.
"up meds psycho"
Yeah, I'm the one with emotional and psychological problems here.
I'm done with you people.

yeah...and its hippy, animal rights, jerkoffs like you, who find an animal that has been run over, or stepped on my a larger animal like a cow...has a broken back, and keep it alive to suffer for another week, where as the "barbarian" is kind enough to put a quick round in its brainpan to end the pain.

"you People". You'd have made a really shitty caveman. Now run along and Protest Disney for that whole "Old Yeller" thing.

When you write up the "I hate Iowanian" article for your website, be sure to quote me on this: "Suk Mah Baows". Now, get along with your stomping off like a 13 year old girl-fit.

If more of you Utopian Dipshits would have grown up on a farm, maybe you too, would have learned that sometimes, even though its not pleasant, the kindest act you can do for an animal is to shoot it.

[Chief Faithful]

Originally Posted by Iowanian

As of last count, there was 1...ONE that nature hadn't polished off...coons, dogs, tomcats aparently don't like kittens, cattle hooves, cars. Nature is a hell of alot more cruel than Humans(check that..the average human) could think of being.

I've seen coons clear a barn of almost 100 cats in a week.

[Iowanian]

whata dilema......Dareth you eliminate Rocky racoon, to save the life of Felix and Garfield?

what a conundrum. End a life to save a life?

oh the choices....

I know, catch Rocky the Racoon and move him to a "no kill shelter".

Better wear some non-leather gloves, and a padded safe transportation cage with adequate ventilation.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Iowanian

yeah...and its hippy, animal rights, jerkoffs like you, who find an animal that has been run over, or stepped on my a larger animal like a cow...has a broken back, and keep it alive to suffer for another week, where as the "barbarian" is kind enough to put a quick round in its brainpan to end the pain.

"you People". You'd have made a really shitty caveman. Now run along and Protest Disney for that whole "Old Yeller" thing.

When you write up the "I hate Iowanian" article for your website, be sure to quote me on this: "Suk Mah Baows". Now, get along with your stomping off like a 13 year old girl-fit.

If more of you Utopian Dipshits would have grown up on a farm, maybe you too, would have learned that sometimes, even though its not pleasant, the kindest act you can do for an animal is to shoot it.

Without reading the whole thread, which would undoubtedly psychologically scar me and drive up my therapy costs significantly, I think there's a big difference between mercy killing an injured animal and killing a pet that's misbehaving.

[chagrin]

I just offered the non-kill shelter as an alternative. I don't recall going animal rights crazy on anyone

[Iowanian]

that wasn't really directed at you cha.

rainman.......When I grew up, if the "dog of the month" were to as much as growl at a visitor...It went "away".

There are alot of levels of Misbehavior, and I know its probably against the grain, but I think that sometimes, it is a perfectly viable option.

Not long ago, my dog, who I spend alot of time dinking around with, usually let go along when I go somewhere(not work related) was having a problem...Severe shit attacks, and dominated my house twice...............un-acceptable.

I took him to the vet, and as they were writing up the $150 bill for the "guess and expensive food".....he started to talk about "surgical options"..at which Point I stopped him and said

"I like my dog. He's a good dog and I have alot of time invested in him, but the Value of his life is $200, and I'll put him down before I spend more than that"

I wouldn't enjoy it, I wouldn't like it, but I'll be damned if I'll be one of the people that spend $1k+ to get my dog worked on.

I know others do, and thats their choice and I respect it. I'm probably just less sensitive after growing up, seeing the things I saw on the farm.

many times, the kindest thing was to put an animal down. Sometimes born too small( runt pigs) would get chewed to death by the others if you didn't give them a whack.

Like I said....nature, is a cruel Bitch.

[chagrin]

Ohhhh, sorry then, carry on

[Rain Man]

Yeah, the medical care thing is a whole different topic, too. There are a lot of different philosophies there, and to be honest I don't think any single one is superior to the others.

I worry about this as my cats get older. I'm a big softie, but at what point would I say, "That's too much money."? I just hope when it happens that it's an easy and obvious decision.

[MOhillbilly]

i dont get off on killing but i dont feel anything either.

[onescrewleftuntwisted]

THROW SOME ROCKS AT IT GIVE IT A GOOD RUNNING START AND THEN

TARGET PRACTICE

10 GAUGE, TURKEY LOADS SHOULD DO THE TRICK






side effects include: messy
gotta find the shovel
digging good sized hole
rocks on grave (do you want the dog to dig it up)
lime

[Brock]

Originally Posted by gblowfish

How bout I send a link on your post to the ASPCA and your local municipal government? Still want to kill an innocent animal?

Dipshit, I don't think posting about killing cats is illegal yet. Write your freaking congressman if you're that upset about it.

[Biohazard]

I think you should auction the cat off here on the planet , and box him up and ship him to whom ever was the highest bidder, so that no one has to hear of the cat being killed, and you make alittle money and are rid of carpet ruining furball! Problem solved

[ct]

Originally Posted by arc

... No body means less grief and the family will eventually get tired of waiting for it to show up.

You ever been to Aruba?