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View Poll Results: How Should I Disqualify Myself From Jury Duty
When they call out your name, get up and sing the Star Spangled Banner 0 0%
Keep insisting you get a smoke break every three minutes 1 6.67%
Tell them you see absolutely nothing wrong with murder over and over 0 0%
Pretend you're deaf 0 0%
Appear at the summons dressed as a member of Kiss 4 26.67%
Raise your hand every few minutes and when they call on you act like you don't know what they're talking about 2 13.33%
Be yourself: Show up drunk 2 13.33%
Fart real loud and blame it on the judge 1 6.67%
Tell the judge you used to date his mother 2 13.33%
You're name is Gaz 3 20.00%
Voters: 15. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-20-2006, 10:51 AM  
CosmicPal CosmicPal is offline
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Jury Summons
I've received a jury summons and I'm not interested in participating in a jury- so here's your chance to offer up suggestions that might disqualify me.
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Old 02-20-2006, 10:52 AM   #2
Saulbadguy Saulbadguy is offline
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Old 02-20-2006, 10:55 AM   #3
RedNFeisty RedNFeisty is offline
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Tell them that you believe strongly in the death penalty, and that a person stealing a candy bar should have their hand cut off.
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Old 02-20-2006, 10:55 AM   #4
StcChief StcChief is offline
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Old 02-20-2006, 10:56 AM   #5
SLAG SLAG is offline
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Talk about how you commited a simliar crime and got away with it
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:00 AM   #6
Skip Towne Skip Towne is offline
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Tell 'em you don't need to hear the evidence. You can spot a criminal a mile away.
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Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:02 AM   #7
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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How about doing your civic duty, ensure a fair verdict for the accused?
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Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:03 AM   #8
Scaga Scaga is offline
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Tell them you went to school with the defendent and thought he was a real prick back then.
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Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.Scaga is not part of the Right 53.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:03 AM   #9
Smed1065 Smed1065 is offline
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:04 AM   #10
chagrin chagrin is offline
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I have always liked to use this one:

Defense Attorney: "Do you think that just because a person is accused of a crime, they are guilty?"

"Absolutely, let's be real here ma'am/sir; if the defendant wasn't guilty they wouldn't be here, would they?"

Or you can jst sit there and stare directly at the defendant while they question the other potential jurors.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:05 AM   #11
Saulbadguy Saulbadguy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian
How about doing your civic duty, ensure a fair verdict for the accused?
They don't pay nearly enough for all the money they have.
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Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.Saulbadguy threw an interception on a screen pass.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:05 AM   #12
Baby Lee Baby Lee is offline
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I'm off to waste my time there tomorrow. I'm sure as soon as they hear my profession, I'll get a thanks and a 'don't let the door. . . ' But the legislature, in their infinite wisdom, are no longer letting folks like me give an out.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:08 AM   #13
CosmicPal CosmicPal is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saulbadguy
They don't pay nearly enough for all the money they have.
No, they don't. According to the summons, the first three days are to be paid by your employer and the following days, you get $50.00/day.

If that wasn't bad enough, they mail you a check six weeks after you've completed jury duty.

At least that's what it says on the summons.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:09 AM   #14
Skip Towne Skip Towne is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baby Lee
I'm off to waste my time there tomorrow. I'm sure as soon as they hear my profession, I'll get a thanks and a 'don't let the door. . . ' But the legislature, in their infinite wisdom, are no longer letting folks like me give an out.
A lawyer on a jury.......how novel.
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Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.Skip Towne is not part of the Right 53.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:12 AM   #15
Predarat Predarat is offline
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Tell them you like to stab judges in the face.
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