The Chiefsplanet Peoplewatching Thread

[Rain Man]

I often see or hear people saying or doing things that I find intriguing, but it's not quite worth making a thread about. I figure that other people might have the same experiences. Therefore, I hope that this thread can become a clearinghouse for those little observations that might not otherwise make the cut.

My first two would be:

1. I went to the optometrist today to get my eyes checked. In the waiting room, a family came in and sat next to me: a mother, a girl of about 13 or 14, and two young boys. The mother is talking on the phone and scolding the boys who are out of control, and then the teenage girl came over to her mother. She's got both hands up near her face, and asks the mother, "What is this?" My initial thinking was that it was something in her eye since we were, after all, in an optometrist's office. Then the girl says, "I thought it was a pimple, but I'm trying to pop it and nothing's coming out."

Where is your shame, young girl? Where is your shame?


2. I came back to the office, and got a cell phone call while I was in my lobby. I was standing there taking the call when this skanky, meth-looking woman in a tank top came in. She got in the elevator and departed toward the heavens. The thing that was most noticeable about her, other than the skanky part, was that she was wearing no supportive garments above the waist, and she badly, badly needed to be wearing them. (Not large, either - envision an inverted champagne flute made out of Slinky.) I finished my call and rode the elevator up myself, and when I got off on my floor, the woman was in the front lobby of the other company on my floor filling out a job application. I really think that a skanky-looking person with bosoms befitting a National Geographic photo should consider wearing a bra or something whilst going in to apply for a job.

Please feel free to post your own minor observations here in the future.

[Rain Man]

You know how the attractive chicks always hang out together? Well, today I discovered that it is apparently a universal trait and not just some aspect of American culture.

I was on a train, and whenever I ride this train I tend to see some sort of Amish/Mennonite/Quaker/Mormon fundamentalists. I have no idea who the group is, but the men all have Amish-style beards and the women wear bonnets and sensible shoes with simple dresses. They don't speak English, either, and I can't identify the language. They're interesting to me.

But anyway, back to the point.

This is a group that tends to be ... corn-fed. The women are generally kind of stocky and unattractive, and their sense of style doesn't help them much. By and large, this is an unattractive sect and I've never seen one of their women that would warrant a second glance.

But that changed today. I was sitting in my seat and a group of them was on the train, and all of a sudden I saw this Amish/Mennonite/Quaker/Mormon supermodel. Sure, she was in a bonnet and a shapeless dress and sensible shoes, but this young woman was smokin' hot. Gorgeous face, and you could tell that there were pleasant curves under that shapeless dress. She was around a 9.5 on the Bo Derek scale.

She was walking down the aisle, talking to the woman behind her that I couldn't see, and as they passed I got an eyeful of the second young woman. She was probably a 7, which makes her at least 5 points more attractive than any other Amish/Mennonite/Quaker/Mormon woman I've ever seen on this train. So the 9.5 and the 7 are hanging out together in a world of 2's and 3's. That's not a coincidence, and it's not like these people are exposed to television media or anything. I therefore conclude that attractive chicks will always seek each other's company, regardless of their culture or civilization.

I later saw them in the dining car with what I presume were their respective beaus. Those guys have to be thanking their religious deity for their good luck in snagging a couple of Amish/Mennonite/Quaker/Mormon babes in a gene pool that certainly didn't offer them good odds. I offer a 19-century fist bump to those two guys.

[Rain Man]

I suffered the ultimate indignity tonight.

I'm at the airport waiting for the bus tonight to get to downtown. The bus comes and I get in line, ending up behind some ultra-friendly, short stocky woman who talks at me for a bit. I mind my own business, and suddenly I hear an angelic voice behind me. Somehow, a young little hottie ended up in line behind me. Where she came from was a mystery.

"Sir, may I ask you a question? Do you know how much the bus costs to go downtown?" She had long brown hair, very notable thorax curves underneath a low cut tank top, and a pair of very short pink shorts.

I stand in shock for a moment. This is a unicorn moment. An attractive young woman just acknowledged my existence and even sought an interaction with me.

"$11 if you don't have a pass", I reply, setting up in my best James Dean pose.

Her big brown eyes got bigger. "Oh, no," she said. "Really?" She looked down at some bills in her hand and got one of those cute little worried eyebrow curls.

Holy cow. A young damsel in distress? And the nice thing about it was that she looked like she had a fair amount of sluttiness to her. You know the look. It was the look that hinted, "If you buy my bus fare I'll thank you by performing oral sex on you in the back row." Note that I'm not at a life stage where I can accept such an offer, but it's always nice to be asked.

My next line at this point would have been "How much do you need?" That simple line would have put this slutty attractive woman in my debt, leading to an offer of oral sex in the back row, and even if that's not allowable I bet she still would have flashed some breast or something. It was a Penthouse letter situation all the way.

Except for that damned stocky woman. Before I could even utter a word, she jumped in to MY conversation and stole MY line when the attractive young woman was talking to ME.

"How much do you need?" she blurted, falling all over herself to steal my thunder.

"I'm a dollar short."

"Well, here! I'll give you a dollar!"

I was going to give the woman a dollar. This was my scene. This was my moment. Everything was set up for me to gain the gratitude of a somewhat slutty looking damsel in distress. But NO!

And now it was ruined. I tried to seize the initiative back. "I'm glad to give you a dol-"

"Here! Here's a dollar! Stocky woman already had a dollar out and handed it to the young woman, who had beautiful slender hands with long fingers.

"Oh, thank you! You're awesome!" The young woman said. She took the dollar. "I owe you one."

"Glad to help, honey." Stocky woman smiled and turned back around, her job done.

And with that, I stood there castrated. I somehow now totally looked like a jerk because I didn't offer any money to a young damsel in distress. I went from Back Row Oral Sex (which presumably would have been offered) to Old Guy With No Chivalry in one interrupted conversation. That was it. Game over.

Women, please listen to me. Please. Never step into a situation like this. You have no business helping an attractive young woman if she's already talking to a middle-aged man. Let nature run its course. You killed me tonight. You sapped my will to live.

[crazycoffey]

You gotta keep the game going, you just missed a double mouth hug moment....

[TinyEvel]

Did the girl actually get on the bus? Or was it a con.

[Dayze]

sounds like that stocky lady might be getting a BJ in the back row of the bus later.

[Why Not?]

Originally Posted by Dayze

sounds like that stocky lady might be getting a BJ in the back row of the bus later.

Almost woke my 2 yr old up from lol.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by TinyEvel

Did the girl actually get on the bus? Or was it a con.

I saw her talking earlier to some obese woman in a muumuu who was smoking at the bus stop, which I'm pretty sure is illegal. I don't know if that woman gave her money or not, but she didn't seem like a high-value target for money, so maybe she was just asking for help with the bus system. The muumuu woman probably looked like she knew a lot about the bus system.

The hottie did indeed get on the bus, but whether she actually needed the dollar to do isn't guaranteed. She could have just been using her shorts and tank top to raise a little money for beer later. But if that was the case then I think she would have been going to men and not to obese women in muumuus. So I think she was a legitimate damsel in distress.

Even if it was a scam, I'd give her a dollar. Attractive young women don't just come up and acknowledge my existence and talk to me every day, so it's not really a scam if I got value from it.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Dayze

sounds like that stocky lady might be getting a BJ in the back row of the bus later.

I bet you're right. I should have paid more attention.

[Rain Man]

On my walk to work today, I saw three people who were obviously coworkers, going out for a cup of coffee or something. There was some goofy looking guy, an insanely attractive woman with the build of a female surfer, and a blind guy who was tapping down the street with his cane.

It seems particularly cruel to be a blind guy who works with a gorgeous female surfer.

[Hydrae]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

On my walk to work today, I saw three people who were obviously coworkers, going out for a cup of coffee or something. There was some goofy looking guy, an insanely attractive woman with the build of a female surfer, and a blind guy who was tapping down the street with his cane.

It seems particularly cruel to be a blind guy who works with a gorgeous female surfer.

But does he even know?

At first this question was whether he knows she is gorgeous but then I realized, he may not understand what that means.

[stumppy]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

But does he even know?

At first this question was whether he knows she is gorgeous but then I realized, he may not understand what that means.

Maybe he got to see what she looks like with his hands.........lucky bastard.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

But does he even know?

At first this question was whether he knows she is gorgeous but then I realized, he may not understand what that means.

That may be even more sad. You'd hope that he would have some sort of mental image of gorgeous, but you're right. Maybe he doesn't.

I wonder if she has a nice voice. They were talking, but I was too far away to hear if she had a melodic and lilting voice.

Originally Posted by stumppy

Maybe he got to see what she looks like with his hands.........lucky bastard.

My guess is no, unless he used it as some sort of introductory request when they first met.

[stumppy]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

That may be even more sad. You'd hope that he would have some sort of mental image of gorgeous, but you're right. Maybe he doesn't.

I wonder if she has a nice voice. They were talking, but I was too far away to hear if she had a melodic and lilting voice.



My guess is no, unless he used it as some sort of introductory request when they first met.

Wouldn't every blind guy do that ? I would.

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

That may be even more sad. You'd hope that he would have some sort of mental image of gorgeous, but you're right. Maybe he doesn't.

I wonder if she has a nice voice. They were talking, but I was too far away to hear if she had a melodic and lilting voice.



My guess is no, unless he used it as some sort of introductory request when they first met.

Well I'm sure he can still be aroused by females with his other senses. Just because he can't sense light bouncing off beautiful women doesn't mean he can't get turned on by some chick.

[threebag]

Maybe she is trying to help him see by sucking all the demons out