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Old 09-14-2013, 10:02 AM   #1
Chief_For_Life58 Chief_For_Life58 is offline
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Her Mom is so special and no wonder her daughter is a complete f**kup!

Since Lindsay Lohan hasn’t f**ked up in a while, one of the Lohans needs to keep up the family’s pristine reputation as responsible citizens of society and that Lohan was White Oprah of course!

CBS New York says that the matriarch of the Wild and Wonderful Lohans was arrested on Long Island at around 11 last night after getting caught speeding on the Northern State Parkway while in her usual state: plastered into another dimension. The police say White Oprah’s white BMW was going 77mph in a 55mph zone. When the police pulled her over, they immediately smelled White Oprah’s natural scent of vodka, bad decisions, f**kery, burnt weave glue, wet cigarette butts and sweaty balls.

White Oprah put her mouth on a Breathalyzer and it read: YUP, SHE’S A LOHAN AND NOW I NEED ANTIBIOTICS! White Oprah blew a .20, over twice the legal limit. Because White Oprah is a sue-happy grifter who is always thinking ahead, she screamed that the police injured her while arresting her ass. An ambulance showed up and after they examined her, they determined that yes, everything about her is broke down, but they didn’t find any injuries. White Oprah knew the jig was up, took it all back and said she was never injured.

The cops gave her tickets for the DUI and speeding. She’ll have to show her face in court on September 24th. After she was booked and her mug shot of beauty was taken, she released to a sober party. Yeah, I think the real news here is that White Oprah actually knows someone who’s sober.
id hit it............with a 2x4.....just so she knows I mean business before I goto town on it
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Old 09-13-2013, 06:58 PM   #2
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Breaking news: Lohan fell asleep.

JFC ...
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Old 09-13-2013, 07:00 PM   #3
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Old 09-13-2013, 07:12 PM   #4
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I'm down with a mother/daughter combo...
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:21 PM   #5
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I'm down with a mother/daughter combo...
Yes.. If there's a line, I won't cut in front of StonedStooge or you, I'm patient...
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:24 PM   #6
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Yes.. If there's a line, I won't cut in front of StonedStooge or you, I'm patient...
Fair enough. I won't leave a mess, I'll be double wrapped.
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Old 09-13-2013, 09:11 PM   #7
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:10 PM   #8
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VonLohan!!!!!
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:11 PM   #9
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VonLohan!!!!!
But with side boob.
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:17 PM   #10
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VonLohan!!!!!
Every time you post this, it makes me think of Lindsey Vonn.

Which, in turn, makes me pretty happy.
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Old 09-14-2013, 12:22 AM   #11
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Every time you post this, it makes me think of Lindsey Vonn.

Which, in turn, makes me pretty happy.
Until you remember that she's banging that scumbag Tiger, who's had his dick in every cheap piece of ass in SoCal, from stippers to porno skanks to Denny's waitresses to Lindsey Vonn.

I mean, I know the guy is loaded, but shit girl...you're hot and I would assume do okay on your own. You really have to denigrate yourself like that?

I used to think she was hot as hell, but everytime I see her now it's "skank."
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Old 09-14-2013, 12:24 AM   #12
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Until you remember that she's banging that scumbag Tiger, who's had his dick in every cheap piece of ass in SoCal, from stippers to porno skanks to Denny's waitresses to Lindsey Vonn.

I mean, I know the guy is loaded, but shit girl...you're hot and I would assume do okay on your own. You really have to denigrate yourself like that?

I used to think she was hot as hell, but everytime I see her now it's "skank."
Don't hate the player.....
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Old 09-14-2013, 06:49 AM   #13
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Until you remember that she's banging that scumbag Tiger, who's had his dick in every cheap piece of ass in SoCal, from stippers to porno skanks to Denny's waitresses to Lindsey Vonn.

I mean, I know the guy is loaded, but shit girl...you're hot and I would assume do okay on your own. You really have to denigrate yourself like that?

I used to think she was hot as hell, but everytime I see her now it's "skank."
So all you're really saying is a Denny's waitress told you to **** off when you tried to hit on her and you still don't have enough coin to buy your way into a porn scene...

Really....you're just mad that he's ****ed them all and you've not ****ed one - just that one church "skank" that didn't know how potent fuzzy navels really are...

See, we can all be offensive towards people we've probably never met..
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:26 PM   #14
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she looked good in that crap movie where she plays a stripper.
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Old 09-13-2013, 08:45 PM   #15
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Damn, I looked at Lindsay's mom... and was like, Damn Lindsay is aging quick. Holy shit.

Then I realized it was her mom. Then I was like... For an old chick, I'd probably hit that.
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