Divorce....

[baitism]

Well, yeah it sucks. Could someone who has been through a divorce with a spouse that was cheating send me a PM? Kansas laws. I need to get the hell out of this situation and could use some advice. Thanks.

[SAUTO]

[QUOTE=Yosef_Malkovitch;13631241]

Originally Posted by cooper barrett

Ahhh, there we go. Good ol' Cooper Blowhard. Since you outed yourself, I'll go ahead and confirm Hamas's guess. Yes, it was you.

And no, I won't be drawn into another discussion with you. I've better things to do with my time.

He won't be able to respond in this thread anymore.

[Frazod]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Because when you marry you become one unit in the eyes of the state. So when you split there isn't her shit and your shit, it's just the shit belonging to the entity. And if the entity becomes 2 separate entities, the logical solution is half.

Yeah, it sucks, but it's the law man.

[Yosef_Malkovitch]

[QUOTE=SAUTO;13631248]

Originally Posted by Yosef_Malkovitch

He won't be able to respond in this thread anymore.

Thanks for letting me know. I was steeling myself to not respond to the onslaught of insults and long-winded stories about how he knows so much more than me even though, ya'know, I'm the one with more than a decade of experience practicing law.

OP: the offer stands. You may have already talked to an attorney, but if not, PM me. No charge to talk and let you bounce ideas off me.

I only do uncontested divorces (and that doesn't sound like what you've got) so I won't be able to do everything that you need, but I'm happy to knock ideas back and forth.

[eDave]

AFter being married twice, with both ending up cheating, I have come to terms that it was my fault in the end. There had to be a reason that two women I loved would do this. The reasons are personal but I figured it out.

My joke to people is that I can get the woman, I just can't KEEP the woman.

baitism - If her cheating is something you can never forgive then move forward with divorce, heeding the advice given here. If not and you want to save this, ask why it happened and work on that.

[kjwood75nro]

Originally Posted by eDave

AFter being married twice, with both ending up cheating, I have come to terms that it was my fault in the end. There had to be a reason that two women I loved would do this. The reasons are personal but I figured it out.

My joke to people is that I can get the woman, I just can't KEEP the woman.

baitism - If her cheating is something you can never forgive then move forward with divorce, heeding the advice given here. If not and you want to save this, ask why it happened and work on that.

That's the problem with marriage...it takes away a man's ability to give a woman options for her actions, which results either in a happier, healthier relationship, or a quicker, less painful breakup on a relationship that would fail anyway.

In bait's case, her cheating could allow him to give her the option to end the relationship, or to stay but with demotions (i.e. she loses her say, he gets side pussy, etc.). But since he's married, the options go away as courts are unacceptably biased towards women. With marriage, it's just fingers crossed that the woman won't do something ****ed up and get rewarded for it anyway.

[eDave]

Originally Posted by kjwood75nro

That's the problem with marriage...it takes away a man's ability to give a woman options for her actions, which results either in a happier, healthier relationship, or a quicker, less painful breakup on a relationship that would fail anyway.

In bait's case, her cheating could allow him to give her the option to end the relationship, or to stay but with demotions (i.e. she loses her say, he gets side pussy, etc.). But since he's married, the options go away as courts are unacceptably biased towards women. With marriage, it's just fingers crossed that the woman won't do something ****ed up and get rewarded for it anyway.

GTFO. You missed the point entirely.

And I'm not implying this is his fault. Just offering a life lesson. In the end, if you are giving your WIFE what she needs and she to you, cheating doesn't happen. Unless she's a nympho or something.

First lesson in marriage: Don't stop ****ing your wife.

[kjwood75nro]

Originally Posted by eDave

GTFO. You missed the point entirely.

And I'm not implying this is his fault. Just offering a life lesson. In the end, if you are giving your WIFE what she needs and she to you, cheating doesn't happen. Unless she's a nympho or something.

First lesson in marriage: Don't stop ****ing your wife.

I'm not saying it's his fault either, just saying that the game of marriage is rigged to the point of absurdity.

As for your claim (paraphrased) to "do right by her and she won't cheat," divorce/family courts across this country are absolutely saturated with the shattered lives and hopes of men who had that optimistic, yet misguided, mindset. It goes beyond giving her good sex; it's a mindset where she looks at you with admiration and respect.

Women's cheating isn't like men's, where men just want to get off on something different. Women's cheating is more emotional. A man can cheat, then go home and continue the relationship. If a woman cheats, then the relationship was over long before that.

But again, married vs. not married messes up the dynamic.

[stevieray]

Originally Posted by eDave

First lesson in marriage: Don't stop loving your wife.

FYP

women want:

love
security

men want:

respect
fidelity

[BWillie]

Originally Posted by stevieray

FYP

women want:

love
security

men want:

respect
fidelity

Men want: feed me, **** me and then .

[Prison Bitch]

Originally Posted by eDave

GTFO. You missed the point entirely.

And I'm not implying this is his fault. Just offering a life lesson. In the end, if you are giving your WIFE what she needs and she to you, cheating doesn't happen. Unless she's a nympho or something.

First lesson in marriage: Don't stop ****ing your wife.

That is so totally false.

People do shitty things to others for all sorts of reasons and we don't rush to blame the victim. If someone steals from you we don't say "Well you're the problem! You didn't lock your garage door properly!" No, we say "That person is a shit and should face charges"

With respect to sex, sure; there's some compatibility there. And if you bark at someone all the time they won't be turned on. But people who cheat are generally just assholes

[Prison Bitch]

Originally Posted by stevieray

FYP

women want:

love
security

men want:

respect
fidelity

They both want the same things.

[Prison Bitch]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Because when you marry you become one unit in the eyes of the state. So when you split there isn't her shit and your shit, it's just the shit belonging to the entity. And if the entity becomes 2 separate entities, the logical solution is half.

Yeah, it sucks, but it's the law man.

That's totally false. Premarital assets are generally protected esp for short duration marriages.


And why shouldn't couples split marital assets? They married. They're of Equal importance both as earners and parents. And both need some financial means to care for kids if they're involved

[stevieray]

Originally Posted by BWillie

Men want: feed me, **** me and then .

No, that's a teenager mentality.

[SPchief]

Originally Posted by Prison Bitch

That's totally false. Premarital assets are generally protected esp for short duration marriages.

100% truth. Because I owned the house before the divorce, (and the equity in it before hand) I walked away with it and she walked away with the cc debt

[Flying High D]

Don’t stay married for over a year. Short duration duly noted.