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Old 09-13-2005, 01:08 AM  
luv luv is offline
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You think she should?

Our insurance rep is going to die the next time my boss sees him. He went to visit her daughter to see what she wanted to do with the balance of her 401-k from when she quit work. He has probably talked her into signing up under him for the Army Reserve. Not a bad thing, right? Well, she has a 4 yr old daughter that she wants her mom (my boss) to take care of while she's gone for 6 weeks for basic training. The 4 yr old has been in Kansas for the last three weeks visiting her dad. I told her that she should suggest he keep her for the 6 weeks of training. I can't believe our insurance rep would try to sign her up knowing she's a single mom. I'm sure $1500 per month for one weekend a month and two weeks a year sounds good to her right now though, since she is looking for work.
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Old 09-13-2005, 01:11 AM   #2
JOhn JOhn is offline
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Not sure I understand the problem....

What's wrong with a single parent signing up to serve their country?
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Old 09-13-2005, 01:14 AM   #3
luv luv is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JOhn
Not sure I understand the problem....

What's wrong with a single parent signing up to serve their country?
Who's going to take care of her daughter? And if she gets called to war? My boss has half raised her granddaughter...she feels she's getting too old to start parenting FT again. Even if for 6 weeks. If the girl's dad has to keep her that long though, she fears his mom would talk him into fighting for full custody.

Otherwise, I would see absolutely no problem with this scenario.
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Old 09-13-2005, 01:55 AM   #4
Taco John Taco John is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JOhn
Not sure I understand the problem....

What's wrong with a single parent signing up to serve their country?

That's a pretty dumb question.
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Old 09-13-2005, 01:57 AM   #5
Taco John Taco John is offline
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I have a different set of values than apparently half of America though when it comes to raising kids. Seems to me that you have a duty to make certain they have at least one parent around to raise them. If you're it, you shouldn't be putting yourself in situations where they lose that parent for an extended period of time, or permanently.
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Old 09-13-2005, 02:01 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taco John
I have a different set of values than apparently half of America though when it comes to raising kids. Seems to me that you have a duty to make certain they have at least one parent around to raise them. If you're it, you shouldn't be putting yourself in situations where they lose that parent for an extended period of time, or permanently.
I agree.
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Old 09-13-2005, 02:17 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taco John
I have a different set of values than apparently half of America though when it comes to raising kids. Seems to me that you have a duty to make certain they have at least one parent around to raise them. If you're it, you shouldn't be putting yourself in situations where they lose that parent for an extended period of time, or permanently.
Exactly. I mean, it's not like my boss doesn't love her granddaughter, but she's not her daughter. She says she isn't the type of grandma she wishes she could be. She wants to be able to spend time with her and spoil her, then send her back to mom. But instead, she's more like a second mother. Not fair to her or the kid.
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Old 09-13-2005, 03:00 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luv2rite
Our insurance rep is going to die the next time my boss sees him. He went to visit her daughter to see what she wanted to do with the balance of her 401-k from when she quit work. He has probably talked her into signing up under him for the Army Reserve. Not a bad thing, right? Well, she has a 4 yr old daughter that she wants her mom (my boss) to take care of while she's gone for 6 weeks for basic training. The 4 yr old has been in Kansas for the last three weeks visiting her dad. I told her that she should suggest he keep her for the 6 weeks of training. I can't believe our insurance rep would try to sign her up knowing she's a single mom. I'm sure $1500 per month for one weekend a month and two weeks a year sounds good to her right now though, since she is looking for work.
I'm just a tad bit confused. Did he or didn't he talk or into it... or is she just thinking about it?? If she hasn't signed anything yet.. I say NOOO she shouldn't do it. If she did get sent off to the Middle East that would be way too sad for the baby!! $1500.00 a month may sound good now... but not when she's seeing people die everyday and living through hell in the middle east, IMHO. It just wouldn't be worth it to me, if it's the money she's after. If it's because she seriously feels strong enough to put her life on the line for sake of this country then I have the utmost respect for her, but still feel it's unfair to the child again... just my opinion.
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Old 09-13-2005, 03:45 AM   #9
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First off, once she is done with basic training, she isn't going to be getting $1500 for one weekend a month. It will be around $300 for one weekend. Two weeks annual training will probably be in the neighborhood of $1200.

The Army requires that all single parents, and dual military submit a family care plan and update it on an annual basis. A family care plan is a detailed plan of who will take care of the Soldier's dependents in the event a Soldier is called to active duty. The Soldier is required to provide a notarized care agreement signed by the person who will be the primary custodian for the children. If you boss doesn't want to be responsible for the children, she is not required to sign the agreement.

TJ's suggestion that no single parents be allowed is unfortunate and would eliminate a lot of quality Soldiers from the Army.
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Old 09-13-2005, 06:15 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taco John
I have a different set of values than apparently half of America though when it comes to raising kids. Seems to me that you have a duty to make certain they have at least one parent around to raise them. If you're it, you shouldn't be putting yourself in situations where they lose that parent for an extended period of time, or permanently.
Great post. I agree.
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Old 09-13-2005, 06:16 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luv2rite
Exactly. I mean, it's not like my boss doesn't love her granddaughter, but she's not her daughter. She says she isn't the type of grandma she wishes she could be. She wants to be able to spend time with her and spoil her, then send her back to mom. But instead, she's more like a second mother. Not fair to her or the kid.
Shouldn't your boss be mad at her daughter rather than the insurance rep? The daughter is the one who is apparently planning to dump her kid on grandma. The insurance rep is just offering an opportunity.
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Old 09-13-2005, 06:23 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taco John
I have a different set of values than apparently half of America though when it comes to raising kids. Seems to me that you have a duty to make certain they have at least one parent around to raise them. If you're it, you shouldn't be putting yourself in situations where they lose that parent for an extended period of time, or permanently.

I, gulp, have to say that this is very well stated.
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