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Old 05-13-2014, 07:11 PM  
BigRichard BigRichard is offline
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My Junk Was On Fire!!!
I just got done making some Indian cuisine that called for a couple of serrano peppers. I chop them up throw them in and wash my hands. Something like 20 minutes later I have to take a piss. I piss, wash my hands and proceed to go back to finishing up the cooking.

About three minutes after pissing I notice this warm sensation in my pants and I say to my wife, hey must of had a little pepper still left on my hands. Another three or four minutes go by and I am starting to hurt a little down in the nether region.

I decide I am going to go get a wet wash cloth to help cool it down. I go to the bathroom and get a wash cloth, wet it and try applying. No such luck, it just isn't helping.

By this time my dick was pretty well on fire and only getting worse. Hey look on the counter, I have aloe I was using for my sunburn. It feels kinda like a sunburn so what the hell I will give it a try.

At this point I am yelling at my wife to start googling what neutralizes the burning from peppers. She walks in the bathroom and here I am, penis in hand, standing in front of the fan(with aloe covering it) trying to cool it down. Not only is none of this working I think I have spread the burning by using my hands to spread the aloe. She is laughing her ass off at this point, I was not so amused.

Her google search turned up that yogurt can help. So she brings me a cup of yogurt and I start rubbing it on. Once again I think I was just helping to spread the burn which at this point has me about doubling over in pain.

Time for a cold ass shower. I strip down and go running for the shower. A nice cold stream of water seemed to soothe the burning. My wife is still googling to find other options and finds that baking soda can help so here she comes with a box of baking soda.

The baking soda seems to have some dulling effect to the burn. I continue to put more on it and finally there is some relief to my pain.

So here I sit typing this with baking soda all over my junk, my wife laughing at me, and I need to piss again but am afraid to at this point. On one positive note the Indian turned out delicious.

And I know, I should have rubbed anti freeze on it.
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Old 05-13-2014, 10:39 PM   #31
RippedmyFlesh RippedmyFlesh is offline
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Although she laughed at least she was trying to help. I would have had her go to an ice cream stand and bring home a huge( I would need huge after all I am a CP member) soft ice cream. Dip it in and say "Dessert honey?"
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Old 05-13-2014, 10:59 PM   #32
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Old 05-14-2014, 01:48 AM   #33
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Hey rub some Bengay on it . .
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Old 05-14-2014, 05:53 AM   #34
InChiefsHeaven InChiefsHeaven is offline
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This is why whenever I work with peppers I wear gloves. Once I was just chopping up some jalepenos and after washing my hands, inadvertently rubbed my eyes. Holy shit, that sucked. It then occurred to me...what if I had to piss?

Been wearing gloves to chop hot peppers ever since.
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Old 05-14-2014, 06:29 AM   #35
Eleazar Eleazar is offline
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I've heard it helps if you dip it in antifreeze
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Old 05-14-2014, 06:31 AM   #36
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Old 05-14-2014, 06:51 AM   #37
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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This is why whenever I work with peppers I wear gloves. Once I was just chopping up some jalepenos and after washing my hands, inadvertently rubbed my eyes. Holy shit, that sucked. It then occurred to me...what if I had to piss?

Been wearing gloves to chop hot peppers ever since.
Yep.

I've known many people to eat wings at the bar and come back from the restroom crying.
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Old 05-14-2014, 06:54 AM   #38
BigRichard BigRichard is offline
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Originally Posted by InChiefsHell View Post
This is why whenever I work with peppers I wear gloves. Once I was just chopping up some jalepenos and after washing my hands, inadvertently rubbed my eyes. Holy shit, that sucked. It then occurred to me...what if I had to piss?

Been wearing gloves to chop hot peppers ever since.
Yes, lesson learned, the hard way.
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Old 05-14-2014, 07:26 AM   #39
Nickel D Nickel D is offline
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While she was laughing at you, you should have fingered a couple of her holes.
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Old 05-14-2014, 07:28 AM   #40
Dayze Dayze is offline
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I thought Serranos weren't as hot as jalepenos?


I've done the same thing, however, though with Jalepenos. su*******ed.
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Old 05-14-2014, 07:34 AM   #41
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The hottest jalepeno (2000-5000 Scoville) is equivalent to the mildest serrano (5000-1500 Scoville).
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Old 05-14-2014, 07:44 AM   #42
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hmmm. didn't know that. Not sure whey I thought it was the other way around.
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Old 05-14-2014, 08:06 AM   #43
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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hmmm. didn't know that. Not sure whey I thought it was the other way around.
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Old 05-14-2014, 08:20 AM   #44
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hmmm. didn't know that. Not sure whey I thought it was the other way around.
The chile pepper rule of thumb: The smaller it is, the hotter it is.
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Old 05-14-2014, 08:23 AM   #45
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One camping trip I went on, there was a guy who rubbed habenero all over his balls on accident the same way you did. It was hilarious watching him run from campsite to campsite and back. He was eventually able to soothe it a bit by rubbing butter on, so now we call him butternut, or squash if we are in polite company.
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