Any advice for a soon to be dad?

[Fat Elvis]

I currently have a daughter, but she came with the wife in the marriage so I didn't start raising her until she was five. We have a new one on the way (late April early May), and quite frankly this little creature is the most awesome force of nature I have ever encountered. At once I am very excited about having a baby, but at the same time I am flat out terrified by the prospect. I think that is normal to feel that way. Anybody have any advice on how to prepare for the new arrival?

Thanks

Fat E

[Phobia]

No real advice, but I can tell you a couple of things based upon my experiences.

I wasn't very interested until the kids became interactive - most dads aren't. So, prepare to be bored with the child for the first several months. They're boring creatures who eat, sleep, and shit. Don't feel guilty about it and don't fake it. Your wife should have this explained to her as well.

[InChiefsHeaven]

Get plenty of rest, you will need it. Kids are definatly more fun after a couple of months, but I don't know. I read to my daughter, talked to her alot when she was first born. Now she's 13 and talks back...I miss those days...sigh...

Seriously, enjoy every minute of it. It goes fast...

[wutamess]

Just take it by the horns and ride this thing on out.
I'm in the same situation (stepdaughter is now 8 and my own is 9 months). Thing is... You have to sit down and talk to the 5yo and let her know what's expected with all the attention going the new one's way that she's still loved no matter what. Thing is... no matter how much you talk they'll still feel neglected but at least they can get some type of warning as to what's expected. It's a helluva shock being the only child to having the attention go to the new child.

Also give her a sense of responsiblity and tell her she's going to have to be the big sistser and help do more around the house (yada yada yada) and help look after the new addition. Even though she won't be doing more just make her think she's going to be the big responsible one.

MOST IMPORTANTLY, you have to treat yours the SAME way you treated the child that's already here. If not she'll see right through it as well as the mother. Basically no favortism because of the blood relation. It'll be hard but you have to keep your eye on the prize of the final product, which'll be 2 damn good kids who turn out to be responsible.

Hope this helps and congrats...
We're expecting our 3rd in Late July.

[Marty Mac Ver 2.0]

You just described half of the male race...

[QUOTE=Phobia]They're boring creatures who eat, sleep, and shit. Don't feel guilty about it and don't fake it. [QUOTE]

[MOhillbilly]

Flush it before its head is to big.

[wutamess]

Flush it before its head is to big.
:eek:

That was a joke made in bad taste.
Besides, it's "too"

~ Very bad/senseless joke.

[InChiefsHeaven]

Flush it before its head is to big.

You ARE going to Hell...you know that right?

[Mr. Kotter]

I know it's hard to believe, but for the most part the previous responses are right on (except Mobillys silliness)....even Phil's. As the father of four, 9 yrs and under, the only thing I would add is it is simultaneously the most rewarding and exhausting experience of your life. Kids are wonderful and a source of great joy, yet they are much more work and time than I ever imagined as a bachelor--IF you intend to be a good parent, and IF you want to raise them right.

Anyone can become a parent; but it takes a lot of hard work, dedication, patience, and compromise to be good dad. Be flexible and be willing to adjust; read some parenting books, or make sure you talk alot with your wife if SHE does that. First and foremost, be willing to learn from your mistakes. Swallow your pride, admit when you are wrong, and then move on. It's much easier said than done. Best wishes and good luck. :thumb:

[Saulbadguy]

Flush it before its head is to big.
ROFL

[The Rick]

It's a very, very surreal feeling when the child is born. At least, it was for me. I just kind of felt like things were moving around me and I was in my own little world or something.

I think everything has pretty much been covered. They aren't very interactive for a while. It's still fun, but different from what you expect. At least it was for me. It doesn't take them long to start doing little things like smiling, etc. It seems like yesterday my daughter was born and now she's 16-months-old, walking, talking, playing games, etc. She's a blast now (well, most of the time anyway).

Those are two things to know. An unexplained phenomenom happens when your child is born. Time actually speeds up. The days, months, and years actually become shorter. On the other hand, one of the best things about having a child is the feeling that you would do *anything* for them.

[Phobia]

:eek:

That was a joke made in bad taste.
Besides, it's "too"

~ Very bad/senseless joke.

See what I mean about your sense of humor condition, Roger?

Everybody else thinks it was funny. This is ChiefsPlanet, not a baby funeral.

[chiefz]

Don't be afraid of the baby, at first you will feel like if you hold them wrong they will break but give it a little time and you will get more comfortable.

I know a lot of dads that have very little to do with their children until they becoming toddlers for that very reason.

Good luck

[morphius]

The lack of sleep was a killer for me. It sounds odd, but talk to the baby in the belly. When my son was born they moved him to the table to clean him up, and do their tests and what not, which of course lead to lots of screaming, but a few seconds of my voice he calmed right down. Phobia is pretty much right though, I don't remember having a lot of fun with the baby until he started learning things, though them learning to smile back you is kind of cool.

[wutamess]

See what I mean about your sense of humor condition, Roger?

Everybody else thinks it was funny. This is ChiefsPlanet, not a baby funeral.

Dude... the baby isn't even here yet and he makes a comment like that?
If someone thinks it was funny it probably was but, that doesn't mean that it wasn't offensive.
I know he didn't really mean it, but it was still bad timing IMO.

~I have no problem with Mohibilly.

[Phobia]

Oh - here's something else you probably already know, FE.

If that baby is fed, clean, warm, and not sick let her cry. She'll eventually learn to use crying to manipulate you if you allow it. If the child has no needs, it needs to learn that crying sucks.

[wutamess]

Oh - here's something else you probably already know, FE.

If that baby is fed, clean, warm, and not sick let her cry. She'll eventually learn to use crying to manipulate you if you allow it. If the child has no needs, it needs to learn that crying sucks.

That's the freaking truth... my 9mo old is spoiled as hell right now because the wifey comes to her every cry. It's to the point she can't even leave a room sometimes.

[Saulbadguy]

Oh - here's something else you probably already know, FE.

If that baby is fed, clean, warm, and not sick let her cry. She'll eventually learn to use crying to manipulate you if you allow it. If the child has no needs, it needs to learn that crying sucks.
Yep. When first born when they cry, their is usually something wrong...but they learn fairly quickly.

[MOhillbilly]

:deevee:you all had your chance,now death is your only release.

Al Bundy was funny cause its true.

[htismaqe]

Get plenty of sex now...

[BigMeatballDave]

I cried when my son was born. Alot. I cut the cord. For me, being a Dad is the greatest. My boy is only 6. I have a Long way to go. Its VERY HARD WORK! Extemely frustrating at the time when they are little, can't speak. You don't know what the hell they want. I've found that the best thing you can do is just love them, and spend time with them. My son just loves it when I just sit with him and watch cartoons. I hate cartoons, and he knows. Still, he just wants me there...

[JimNasium]

I really enjoyed the infant through 2 1/2 years stage. The most frustrating years for me were from about 3-5 years of age when they really struggle with the transition from a toddler. I'm having a blast with mine now. They are aged 6 and 8.... in particular the 8 year old is fun to watch as she has become very curious intellectually. It's fun to explore art museums, zoos, science centers and the like with her or explore various types of music.

[JimNasium]

I cried when my son was born. Alot. I cut the cord. For me, being a Dad is the greatest. My boy is only 6. I have a Long way to go. Its VERY HARD WORK! Extemely frustrating at the time when they are little, can't speak. You don't know what the hell they want. I've found that the best thing you can do is just love them, and spend time with them. My son just loves it when I just sit with him and watch cartoons. I hate cartoons, and he knows. Still, he just wants me there...
I refused to cut the cord on mine. I told the doctor "That's what I'm paying you to do." She looked at me like I was a crazy man or something.

[BigMeatballDave]

I refused to cut the cord on mine. I told the doctor "That's what I'm paying you to do." She looked at me like I was a crazy man or something.It felt kinda weird. Like cutting a thick rubber band...

[ROYC75]

Anything that you remember about your parents going against your opinions, multiply that times the # of kids.

Really, whatever you liked as a kid growing up will be mild compaired to what your kids will face.

[ZepSinger]

I currently have a daughter, but she came with the wife in the marriage so I didn't start raising her until she was five. We have a new one on the way (late April early May), and quite frankly this little creature is the most awesome force of nature I have ever encountered. At once I am very excited about having a baby, but at the same time I am flat out terrified by the prospect. I think that is normal to feel that way. Anybody have any advice on how to prepare for the new arrival?

Thanks

Fat E

I was in almost the exact same position as you about 13 years ago. The future wife had a 4 yr. old daughter that came with the marriage... then, we proceeded to procreate. 3 more daughters.

Can't say much for fun-time interaction of either the infant or teen years(stepdaughter is now 17), but man, I am truly lovin' spending time with my 2, 5, and 7 year olds! This is the time when they think you are the greatest thing in the world; and they LOVE spending time with you, doing everything and anything with you.

The most important thing I can tell you is- these special years go by SOOOO fast. Just a few short years that seem like months. Enjoy them! Spend lots of time with your kids, make those memories- play with them, read bedtime stories to them, make them lunch, be silly with them, pray with them, etc.. Hey, if you don't have fun with them now, they won't want to have fun with you later.

Just 2 cents from a sentimental father of 4 girls.. :deevee:

Z

[Radar Chief]

For absolutely no good reason, take a nap in the middle of the afternoon. And be sure to enjoy it cause it won’t happen again for a while. A LONG while.

[KCWolfman]

You have seen the posts on this board and you want advise to start a kid off here?

My advise, go elsewhere for advise.

[BigMeatballDave]

I was in almost the exact same position as you about 13 years ago. The future wife had a 4 yr. old daughter that came with the marriage... then, we proceeded to procreate. 3 more daughters.

Can't say much for fun-time interaction of either the infant or teen years(stepdaughter is now 17), but man, I am truly lovin' spending time with my 2, 5, and 7 year olds! This is the time when they think you are the greatest thing in the world; and they LOVE spending time with you, doing everything and anything with you.

The most important thing I can tell you is- these special years go by SOOOO fast. Just a few short years that seem like months. Enjoy them! Spend lots of time with your kids, make those memories- play with them, read bedtime stories to them, make them lunch, be silly with them, pray with them, etc.. Hey, if you don't have fun with them now, they won't want to have fun with you later.

Just 2 cents from a sentimental father of 4 girls.. :deevee:

ZAwesome!
:thumb:

[htismaqe]

Get plenty of sex now...

It needs to be repeated...

[Radar Chief]

Get ready for plenty of this :deevee:, this :Lin: and this Raiders
and say goodbye to this :hump: and this ZZZ .

[htismaqe]

Get ready for plenty of this :deevee:, this :Lin: and this Raiders
and say goodbye to this :hump: and this ZZZ .

Perfect summary...