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Old 04-23-2009, 02:30 PM  
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Now I know why wii's are so popular...
Quote:
The OIOO is actually two devices sharing one common name, much like you will be sharing STDs with your roommates if you ever actually buy one. The OI and OO are a dildo and a synthetic vagina, respectively, that you slip over your WiiMote. This, in combination with special software that syncs up with Skype, allows you to virtually screw somebody over the Internet, a pastime which was normally only reserved for 4chan.

Supposedly the vibrations will feed back and forth between the two devices allowing two partners to simulate sex, and that's a fine idea for very sad people who are far away from each other, but it's also pretty dangerous. First and foremost, as pretty much any male can confirm, one is not exactly in the best mindset for subterfuge, post-orgasm. That is to say, the sated and deflated feeling that follows orgasm is not conducive to the thoroughness required for the cleaning up and hiding of pornographic or sexual materials. Still too oblique?

Fine: Somebody, at some point, is going to leave a pocket pussy on their WiiMote.

Do you want to put your penis in this? No? Congratulations! There is nothing wrong with you.

If you live in a college dorm, you're likely going to be responsible for coining the new term "Wii-STD." If you live with children, you're likely to be under arrest. If you live alone, you're likely to find yourself accidentally playing the most terrifyingly erotic game of Resident Evil 4 in the existence of man. And there are no therapy sessions for an experience like that; you just live with that darkness forever, until it finally takes you.


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Old 04-23-2009, 03:05 PM   #16
Lumpy Lumpy is offline
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You'd have something to do while your husband is reading romance novels.
Wait, what?!
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Old 04-23-2009, 03:48 PM   #17
TinyEvel TinyEvel is offline
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Old 04-23-2009, 03:52 PM   #18
Buck Buck is offline
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The hole seems a little small...
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Old 04-23-2009, 03:57 PM   #19
TinyEvel TinyEvel is offline
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The hole seems a little small...
Yeah. I hacked one for myself by removing the strings of this...
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Old 04-23-2009, 03:58 PM   #20
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Yeah. I hacked one for myself by removing the strings of this...
Tiny, I don't know that I should be the one explaining you to this but "head" doesn't mean you literally stick your whole head in a woman's vagina.
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Old 04-23-2009, 05:08 PM   #21
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Old 04-23-2009, 05:20 PM   #22
CaliforniaChief CaliforniaChief is offline
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THAT'S the Jay Cutler edition of the Wii-mote. You use it to play Madden '10 (with Cassel's picture on it, of course) and then use the female version to navigate your way through the off-season. They'll even decorate it in black and orange.
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Old 04-23-2009, 05:30 PM   #23
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Sounds like 1993!
I admit to dating older guys when I was 14, but I didn't experiment with gin until years later.
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Old 04-23-2009, 08:02 PM   #24
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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The hole seems a little small...
Its specially sized for Eggo fans.
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