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Old 09-24-2008, 09:15 AM  
Chiefnj2 Chiefnj2 is offline
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Farting is now considered a misdemeanor
CHARLESTON, W.Va. (WSAZ) -- As if getting a DUI wasn’t enough, a man arrested for driving under the influence got in a lot more trouble at the police station.

Police stopped Jose Cruz on Route 60 in South Charleston Monday night for driving with his headlights off.

Then, he failed sobriety tests and was arrested.

When police were trying to get fingerprints, police say Cruz moved closer to the officer and passed gas on him. The investigating officer remarked in the criminal complaint that the odor was very strong.

Cruz is now charged with battery on a police officer, as well as DUI and obstruction.
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:17 AM   #2
Simply Red Simply Red is offline
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You've gotta be shitting?!
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:17 AM   #3
Goapics1 Goapics1 is offline
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Originally Posted by Chiefnj2 View Post
CHARLESTON, W.Va. (WSAZ) -- Jose Cruz
Didn't he play for the Houston Astros in the late 70's early 80's?
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:18 AM   #4
Frazod Frazod is offline
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Oh shit my picture's going to be in every post office in America.

And how funny that my 50,000th post was about farting?
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:18 AM   #5
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Oh man - I need to go surrender to the authorities.

Maybe the Mr. Blonde mystery has been finally solved.
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:20 AM   #6
chasedude chasedude is offline
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beer farts!! FTW!
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:21 AM   #7
Rausch Rausch is offline
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I'm ****ed.

No permit for a concealed weapon...
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I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:21 AM   #8
mikey23545 mikey23545 is offline
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In that case, some of my farts will be considered felonies, if not capital crimes...
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:25 AM   #9
Redrum_69 Redrum_69 is offline
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have the republicans thought about this as a possible alternative to fossil fuels....
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:35 AM   #10
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Im working on a self-propelled auto using natural gas .. but can't get "ole growler" to hook the tube to her ass ...
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:41 AM   #11
TrebMaxx TrebMaxx is offline
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This just stinks! How dare anyone outlaw one of my favorite hobbies. Don't let this news get to my wife. She will be calling 911 on me, especially on chili or ham and beans night.
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:43 AM   #12
Rausch Rausch is offline
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Originally Posted by mikey23545 View Post
In that case, some of my farts will be considered felonies, if not capital crimes...
Rule 3298: don't fart on the mailman...
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"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).
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Originally Posted by rico
I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:50 AM   #13
Gonzo Gonzo is offline
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Originally Posted by frazod View Post
Oh shit my picture's going to be in every post office in America.

And how funny that my 50,000th post was about farting?


I was just going to say you were hosed Fraz...
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:56 AM   #14
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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I've farted in at least half a dozen police cars over the years.

If I'm getting a ticket, I'm straining to near danger if I must to bust ass.

Silent but violent are my favorite. Its a moment of pleasure, when you hand them back the signed document, collect your license and see the moment of disgust as they realize what happend.
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Old 09-24-2008, 10:21 AM   #15
Kerberos Kerberos is offline
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My wife could have enough to have me convicted of attempted murder with some of my ass bombs she has endured while married to me.

She reads this shit I may have to start actually leaving the room and going outside to relieve my pains.

This just ain't right. DAMMIT CARL
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