ok who threw the kitten...in the wood chipper??

[onescrewleftuntwisted]

Brave kitty survives wood chipper
[You'll never chip me, 'cuz I'm f@cking innocent!]

In January the world gasped at the story of a cat who walked away from an archer's attack with an arrow through his shoulders. In March, a tough-as-nails kitty took six rounds from a marksman and lived to chase mice again. But a kitten in Florida has raised the bar for feline toughness after surviving a terrifying journey through the hungry teeth of a wood chipper.

Maury Swee runs a no-kill shelter in Boca Raton. Two weeks ago he got an anonymous call explaining the grisly details. It seems a kitten had fallen asleep inside a wood chipper. When workers flipped the switch, the giant tree-chewing machine spit out the bloodied kitten.

"This little kitten has pretty much used up his nine lives," joked Swee.

Swee met the caller at a nearby gas station and rushed the limp, mangled cat to South Dixie Animal Hospital in West Palm Beach. It was there that Dr. Salvatore Zeitlin began rebuilding the kitty.

"He just gets stronger and better with time," says Zeitlin.

The cat's head is now tilted to the side, the result of a broken neck. Two badly broken legs cause a severe limp. The right eye is in tough shape, but it works. Zeitlin's final surgery on the brave cat will be to remove a huge scab from the of his head.

As if this noble beast hasn't suffered enough indignity and pain, the fine folks who have saved his life have named him "Chippers."

[sedated]

should have used antifreeze

[hypersensitiveZO6]

Everytime you have sex, god kills a kitten.

[Alton deFlat]

Probably that mean SOB from Fargo

[onescrewleftuntwisted]

looks like its not safe to go to the beach at all

Beach Patrol officer drives over sunbather
By LYDA LONGA
Staff Writer

DAYTONA BEACH -- For the second time in less than a year, a sunbather lying on a towel on the sand was struck by a Beach Patrol officer.

Florida Highway Patrol spokeswoman Kim Miller said officer Robert Augustynowki, 43, was driving a Dodge pickup on Monday afternoon along the beach just south of Main Street warning beachgoers about impending rip tides when he ran over 20-year-old Danielle Taylor.

Miller said the young tourist from Georgia was lying on her towel while her boyfriend was enjoying the surf.

"Two of the tires rolled over her shoulder and her hip," Miller said Monday evening. "She started screaming and rolled over, and that's when he (the officer) saw her."

Beach Patrol spokesman Scott Petersohn said Augustynowski, who was driving between 2 and 5 mph, never saw Taylor because she was lying "just below a berm on the sand."

Paramedics took Taylor to Halifax Medical Center. Her condition was not available Monday night.

In August 2005, Beach Patrol officer Rob Horster, a 20-year veteran of the department, ran over a 25-year-old woman who also was sunbathing on a lounge chair. In that accident, the woman sustained cuts and bruises on her arm and side.

At the time, Petersohn said accidents involving the Beach Patrol are infrequent. But he also said he was surprised such incidents didn't occur more often.

"It could happen to anyone of us,"' Petersohn said then.

In 2003, a Miami Beach police officer ran over two French tourists as they sunbathed on the beach there. The officer, who was driving a Ford Explorer, was searching for two robbery suspects.

One of the women died later that day from "crushing injuries consistent with a rolling tire," according to an article published in the Miami Herald. The other woman, her sister, was in the hospital for a month recovering from a punctured lung and a lacerated liver, the newspaper reported.

The police officer was not charged in the accident.

[Pitt Gorilla]

NEDM