The Official Glory Years for ex-jocks thread

[KC Jones]

Come relive your greatest moments from playing sports! Tell everyone who doesn't really care and will only make fun of you what some of your fondest memories of playing sports are.

Something DemonPenz mentioned in another thread about coaches giving out stickers for your helmet reminded me of a few plays from back in the day. No need to limit it to football - share any ex-jock story as long as it's not a swimmer/soccer/bundle of sticks story

[KC Jones]

So the story that DemonPenz reminded me of...

We were up by 2 points towards the end of the game and I was in at DE while our opponent was driving dangerously close to FG range. The coach starts yelling my name and when I look over at him he yells something about getting 2 stickers for a sack. My first thought was "WTF, I want to win I don't give a shit about the stickers". Then I realized he was looking for some kind of reaction from me other than just starring at him like he was some kind of dumbass. So I acted all crazy and ran down the front of our D-line pounding everyone on the helmet. It seems to have worked well, because I knocked the OT on his ass and bowled the RB into the QB. It wasn't a sack cause he got rid of the ball, but I remember hearing him say as he was helped up "Who the **** has beef over there!?!?" I was grinning from ear to ear.

Damn, I do miss playing football in pads.

[Garcia Bronco]

i.e..the Al Bundy Thread.

We used to play tackle football in the USMC - without pads. That all stopped one Saturday when I sent 3 guys to the hospital, 3 other guys went (not my fault) and I spent some time at the dentist to make sure I didn't damage my teeth after hitting a guy and catching my mouth on his elbow. That was an unforgettable weekend.


I have more stories, but since my religious parents wouldn't let me do anything other than track in high school, most of them are boring old guy softball/volleyball/golf stories. Also played CB in the Corps - as a 200 lbs CB, I was bigger than most the LB's.

[KC Jones]

Originally Posted by Garcia Bronco

i.e..the Al Bundy Thread.

I tend to think of myself as more of a Hank Hill

[Skip Towne]

The " first liar doesn't stand a chance" thread.

[Rain Man]

In high school, I completed a calculus problem that our teacher had been assigning for almost 20 years, and no one had ever gotten it right. It kind of freaked him out.

(Hey, that's the best I've got. My parents wouldn't sign the permission slip to let me play football.)

[Baby Lee]

Scored a goal directly off a corner kick in an under-16 tournament championship. Was bending it like Baby Lee while Beckham was in short pants.
Turned out later that corner kicks are indirect, meaning it shouldn't have been allowed. But I've always been proud of my ability to place a long free kick anywhere I wanted.
Then in HS, we had our opening game against Lee's Summit who was #1 in the state, and I think ended up winning State that year. We had them 0-0 late in the game and I got a free kick at about 40 yards out. Put the ball within 3 inches of both the top and far posts at pace. But the goalie made a last minute leap to knock it over the top post. They scored in the waning minutes. That hurt.
Little did I know I should have spent my time kicking that oblong brown ball instead.

[Rain Man]

Wow. Baby Lee just trumped me for the least jockish post. I wasn't wearing soccer shorts when I solved the calculus problem.

[Hammock Parties]

It was 1994. I was 12.

It had reached the finals of the Carrollton Independent School District McCoy Elementary Spelling Bee.

All that stood between me and the title was Nicole Frederick, a hulking 200-lb girl that made even the biggest 6th-grade boy look like a 1st-grader. She lived on the same street as me, and I hated her with a passion.

Nicole, and the word "rotisserie."

I almost panicked. But then my training came back to me.

Kentucky. Fried. Chicken. Commercial.

Game over.

A cafeteria full of rabid 6th graders cheered me as I vanquished the hated yellow-haired fatty troll. I stood, and proudly displayed the Vulcan Salute. Live long, and prosper.

The trophy dictionary still sits on my weathered bookshelf. But it belongs to KFC. They do spelling right.

[CosmicPal]

How bout a sports blunder?

I was in a pee wee baseball league- must have been 6 yrs old I think....

But, my first at bat- I hit a grounder to the shortstop and took off running for first base- only to trip myself up with my shoelaces and fall flat on my face. I dashed up, losing one shoe, and took off for first base again- the shortstop experienced a little fielding trouble as he repeatedly tried to pick up the ball. Anyways, I finally made it to first base safe, only to trip over the bag and fall flat on my face again. Much to the uproarous laughter emanating from my teammates dugout.

As for some of my glory moments: Most of them are golf related. Hitting my first and only hole-in-one thus far was a special memory. I did it in front of some friends while we were playing in the junior golf program. The weirdest thing was- one of my buddies was watching from the green behind me as I hit my drive- he saw my shot go in. The very next week- I'm behind his group. We're on the green, and I watch him hit his drive in for a hole-in-one!

I won a handful of golf tournaments over the years and had great aspirations, but a sore lack of discipline disrupted any further advancement of my game.

I played little league football, baseball, basketball, and soccer as well....Football was by far and away my favorite sport. Some of my favorite childhood memories were playing football...it's no wonder I watch it with great delight today.

[Son of Logical]

It was the final season game of my Senior year (1998). It was against our crosstown rivals for the league championship and for a rotary cup.
It was 4 and 1 on our 40 yard line. I was the starting right tackle. The
ball was being ran right behind me. The Q.B. hiked the ball and at first our entire line was jammed, but I started to get a push on my guy. I onbacked the DE and our fullback followed me all the way to the endzone. The crowd cheered. Even though it was for the touchdown, it felt like it was for me. AHHHH...memories, I really miss organised football.

[Saulbadguy]

I was always terrible at sports. Fat awkard Jewish kids aren't too good at anything sports related, but one day I had my shining moment. We were up in our pitching machine pitch league something like 2-1, 9th inning 2 outs, and one of the opposing teams players hit one my way (right field, of course), and I stuck my glove in the air, closed my eyes, and ended up with the ball. I got a stupid little plastic trophy that said "Play of the Year", but it meant alot to me at that time.

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Wow. Baby Lee just trumped me for the least jockish post. I wasn't wearing soccer shorts when I solved the calculus problem.

Struggling to recover from your witty rejoinder reminded me of a couple of other glory moments.

Squatting 550 lbs. in 'Physical Fitness' class. Physical Fitness was the gym class the football team took to work out during school hours. And I was 100 lbs above their best. [As an aside, my gym coach (before whom I performed the squat) was Gregg Williams].

Not getting pinned wrestling in 9th grade gym. Sounds lame, but there was this hispanic guy who mauled people, very wiry, very rangy, very strong. In the course of the 2 weeks we wrestled in class, no one [including the wrestlers on JV] lasted more than a minute before being pinned. He tossed me all over that mat, but I went the whole six minutes.

[siberian khatru]

I hit a winning 17-foot jumpshot from the corner in a gym class basketball game my sophomore year of high school. I decided to retire while on top.