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Old 07-16-2015, 08:21 PM  
Al Bundy Al Bundy is offline
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Man arrested for having sex with a Gator..
Sex With a Gator
Florida Man Arrested for Having Sex with an Alligator
JUL 13, 2015

EVERGLADES CITY, Florida –

People have had sex with pit bulls, and even parrots, but this incident is on another level.

Rupert Darwin, 59, kept a 12 foot alligator tied and blindfold for the last month, sexually assaulting the reptile multiple times a day.

Florida Man Arrested for Having Sex with an Alligator
Darwin is a relatively unknown fisherman who lives in the outskirts of the remote town of 400. Residents say he sticks to himself and described him as “odd.”

Police responded after a man out of a nature hike happened to walk by Darwin’s house and saw Darwin having sex with the alligator in his backyard.

The witness heard Darwin say, “next time you try to kill a man, you best get the job done. Now you’re my bitch forever.”

“It was the damn strangest thing I’ve ever seen,” the witness told police. “The gator didn’t even move. It was like it didn’t give a s**t that man was having sex with it.”

Collier County Sheriffs responded and arrested Darwin on multiple counts of animal cruelty and one count of illegally keeping a wild animal.

Excerpt from Darwin’s police statement:
The gator tried to eat me and this was revenge, pure and simple. I don’t have no sexual attraction to gators, but I wanted to teach this bitch a lesson. I could have just killed her, but that would have been too easy. She was getting what she deserved.

Darwin also told police he had planned to chop off the alligator’s tail and pull her teeth as part of his revenge scheme and had even considered performing noise torture on the reptile by playing what Darwin described as “****er music” over and over.

Darwin claimed the alligator had gotten a hold of his pant leg when he was fishing in a swamp and tried to drag him into the water. Darwin was able to escape without injury, but that had set his resolve to get revenge.

The alligator is being treated for relatively minor injuries and is expected to be released back into the wild within a couple weeks.
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:23 PM   #2
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And some of you actually thought Texas was going to give Florida a run for its money as the weirdest shit happens in that state champion.
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:34 PM   #3
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:36 PM   #4
Eleazar Eleazar is offline
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It seems unjust. The guy's last name is even Darwin.
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:38 PM   #5
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Arrested? The guy should win an award. He raped a ****ing alligator. Guy that tops that will be boning a shark!
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Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:38 PM   #6
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:38 PM   #7
Mother****erJones Mother****erJones is offline
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:39 PM   #8
Sully Sully is offline
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And we argue over who espn should give a courage award to.

This guy wins lifetime achievement!
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Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:40 PM   #9
Sully Sully is offline
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But really, the University of Florida Gators football team has been getting raped every Saturday for a few years, now.
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:43 PM   #10
Demonpenz Demonpenz is online now
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:57 PM   #11
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How did he teach that thing to roll over? Need a penz pic
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Old 07-16-2015, 08:59 PM   #12
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"The alligator is being treated for relatively minor injuries and is expected to be released back into the wild within a couple weeks."



Really? That soon? The alligator should be on suicide watch for that kind of trauma how is he going go hang out with his buddies in the wild? He needs to seek professional therapeutic help.
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Old 07-16-2015, 09:04 PM
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Old 07-16-2015, 09:06 PM   #13
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So he was basically revenge ****ing an alligator for trying to kill him, and was going to go all Hostel on it? That's pretty ****ing hardcore.
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Old 07-16-2015, 09:09 PM   #14
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dfasdfasdf squirter
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Old 07-16-2015, 09:10 PM   #15
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dfasdfasdf squirter
****, man. Burst out laughing at that one.
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