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Old 12-16-2013, 05:22 PM   Topic Starter
PunkinDrublic PunkinDrublic is offline
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Winner of Get My Grandpa Laid Contest dies hours before his appointment
Grandpa chokes to death on steak hours before sex for first time in over a decade

15 Dec 2013 12:01 Johnny Orris had won Howard Stern's 'Get My Grandpa Laid' competition and was about to enjoy a romp with two prostitutes


Johnny Orris, bottom right, won a coupon for sex at Nevada's famed Bunny Ranch

Howard Stern
An 86-year-old widower choked to death on a steak hours before he was due to have sex for the first time in more than a decade.

Johnny Orris had won Howard Stern's 'Get My Grandpa Laid' TV competition and was about to enjoy a three-in-a-bed romp with two prostitutes at the Bunny Ranch, a legal brothel in Nevada.

But tragedy struck when he choked during a celebratory meal at a steak house hours before he was due to claim his 'prize'.

Mr Orris' grandson Ed, 49, said he had been "on cloud nine" at the time.

The pair had flown in from Illinois and had already picked out two girls, Vanity and Caressa Kisses, at the Bunny Ranch.


Famed: Nevada's Bunny Ranch is one of the few legal brothels in the US

Facebook/Moonlite Bunny Ranch


Owner Dennis Hof said Mr Orris had wanted to have a steak "before the big game".

"Johnny said he was prepping for the "Super Bowl of Sex" and he never got there," Hof told New York's Daily News.

Ed Orris told TMZ he decided to use the free coupon himself although he didn't have sex with Caressa or Vanity because "that would have been weird."

Johnny's wife died 11 years ago and he said had not had sex with anyone else since.

His grandson entered him into Howard Stern's 'Get My Grandpa Laid' competition in October and Johnny had emerged as the lucky winner.



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Old 12-16-2013, 05:33 PM   #2
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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Thought he was getting some pussy, ended up choking on meat... a terribly ironinc ending to be sure.
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:39 PM   #3
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Yeah, it would suck if your last dying thought was "Missed that threesome by an hour."

So does the prize fall to the runner up? Might I suggest he have the tuna melt?
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:43 PM   #4
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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So does the prize fall to the runner up? Might I suggest he have the tuna melt?
far more appropriate, and safer.
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:53 PM   #5
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Yeah, it would suck if your last dying thought was "Missed that threesome by an hour."

So does the prize fall to the runner up? Might I suggest he have the tuna melt?
Grandson used the pussy coupon already.

I can hear him explaining, "my grandpa always taught me to not be wasteful."
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Old 12-16-2013, 07:19 PM   #6
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Yeah, it would suck if your last dying thought was "Missed that threesome by an hour."

So does the prize fall to the runner up? Might I suggest he have the tuna melt?
I was listening that day. If I recall correctly, the owner of the bunny ranch agreed to give all three finalists a free lay.
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:44 PM   #7
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I think it's time for Sheryl Crowe to add another verse to "Ironic".
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:45 PM   #8
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he was limp then went 'stiff'
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Old 12-16-2013, 06:18 PM   #9
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I think it's time for Sheryl Crowe to add another verse to "Ironic".
Or maybe Alanis Morissette should.
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Old 12-16-2013, 07:24 PM   #10
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Or maybe Alanis Morissette should.
I know. DAMMIT! I reopened this thread and immediately caught it, but knew it would be too late and scrolled down to see it pointed out to me. I get so few chances to make Alanis Morrisette references, so frustrating. Like Raaaiin on your wedding day!
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Old 12-17-2013, 10:29 AM   #11
MTG#10 MTG#10 is offline
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I know. DAMMIT! I reopened this thread and immediately caught it, but knew it would be too late and scrolled down to see it pointed out to me. I get so few chances to make Alanis Morrisette references, so frustrating. Like Raaaiin on your wedding day!
Well to be fair they both were popular around the same time, both are white brunettes, and both play shitty music so I can understand your mistake.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:22 AM   #12
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Or maybe Alanis Morissette should.


I was gonna say it'd be weird for Alanis.
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:46 PM   #13
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He was 86, so he was probably better off choking on the steak. He missed out on the bitter disappointment of his Viagra failing and at least he got to taste a good cut of beef. Beats getting eaten by a shark.
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Old 12-16-2013, 05:57 PM   #14
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Old 12-16-2013, 06:03 PM   #15
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